I need advice: (funny/embarrassing/interesting story)

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Refresh7, Mar 15, 2009.

  1. Refresh7

    Refresh7 Member

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    So I'm an 18 yr old college student and I'm home for the weekend. Obviously, I don't have a lot of opportunity to jerk off at my dorm, so when I'm home I take advantage. And my dad is always knocking at my door in such an annoying way. And over this past year, when my door is locked and I take a long time to answer it he thinks I'm like hiding something, and has since hinted or suggested that I was drinking or doing drugs behind the closed door.

    Anyway, today I was really horny since I hadn't jerked off in like 2 weeks. I was in my room having a really good jerk off (like really good) and my dad started knocking at the door. And he was really persistent this time as the rest of the family was out of the house. I wasn't going to answer and I wasn't going to stop jerking off because I didn't want to finish early and it was really good, so I ignored him. Then I heard him get the key to unlock the door while I was in mid-jerk, and I got really pissed. I just walked over and angrily opened the door completely erect telling him I was trying to jerk off. And he saw the harcore porn in the background. He laughed and seemed impressed by the porn and checked it out for like 5 seconds. I told him to give me like 2 minutes and he said ok. And I shut the door, and now I'm so embarrassed and regret how it went down.

    I walked in on him watching porn before this happened and he covered my eyes and changed the channel. I don't know what to do because he always treated me like a baby, and now, it seems as if he sees me more like a man now, so I don't know how what to say to him or how open I can now be, and on top of that I'm morbidly embarrassed but surprisingly feeling empowered. What do I do?
     
  2. Garth33

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    I think you handled it the BEST way you could have and completely removed any doubt about what you were doing!:rolleyes: You have no reason to be embarassed and he probably is WAY more embarassed than you right now. PLUS! Now you can have all the beer and weed in your room you want because the next time he comes knocking, just yell out "Please...I'm JACKING OFF!!!":cool:
     
  3. Refresh7

    Refresh7 Member

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    ^ lol that's true. But since the incident today, I have only talked to him in front of my mom and little brother. I haven't talked to him in private yet. What do I say? lol And now that he knows what I'm doing and I know that he does it too, should I be more open about it?
     
  4. SR_Manny Manparts

    SR_Manny Manparts New Member

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    WOw, thats a good, funny, interesting story!! But now he probably wont treat you like a baby now. And you guys can be more open!!
     
  5. Refresh7

    Refresh7 Member

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    Well we haven't talked yet since the incident and we barely talk at all in general. Even though I'm still shuddering with embarrassment, do you think I should take this opportunity to be more open?
     
  6. Garth33

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    I wouldn't bring it up (so to speak:rolleyes:) unless he does but I don't think you have to be more "open" about it when you effectively CLOSED the situation very well.

    Go back...when he was rattling the locked door (you were also smart to lock it becuase that implies "I want privacy!") he probably had 3 thoughts in his head...he's DRINKING...he's SMOKING POT...or he's jacking off!!! Now big Daddy thinks he's going to "bust you" by getting the key and coming in to find you drunk or stoned...instead, you open the door with a hard cock and a porno going in the background! It couldn't have been more obvious WHAT you were doing (you can't hide beer in a closet, pop in a porno, AND pop a boner in 2 minutes:rolleyes:) and he looks like the asshole for busting in on you in a private moment and most likely he knows it! I'm going to guess the next time you're home and the room is locked he'll knock then just go away...you are an adult after all and sure as hell he remembers what is was like to be a teenager. It's ackward I know for the first couple times but trust me, years from now, you guys will be laughing about this so hard you won't believe it.

    Best of luck bud!
     
  7. BirdinMo

    BirdinMo Member

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    Yes! This is a great time to open up to him and have a great relationship with him the rest of your life.
     
  8. karldergrosse

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    Sounds as if maybe your father-son relationship is pretty well like too many of them: not particularly close in a number of ways, especially perhaps in the sense of having received any parental sex information as you matured. (And if you're 18 and away at college, you are for all intents and purposes a virtually mature man now.) My own father never even vaguely brought up the topic but twice: once when I was 14 and he asked if I thought I should be circumcised (why, I never asked: my instantaneously bellowed "NO! was the end of the subject) and the day I started college, with some not-too-knowledgeable advice about disease-prevention (because girls might seduce me!!!). Once when I was 14 he accidentally opened the bathroom door that I had forgotten to lock and saw me jacking at the lavatory. With an apologetic "Oh!" he closed it and left. The incident was never mentioned. Then when I was 16 or 17 he noticed through the shower curtain (more transparent than I thought!) that I was wanking, whereupon he jerked the curtain back and demanded to know what I was doing. My not-so-innocent "Nothing!" put an end to it. So go figure--what sort of half-assed father-son relationship was that? Anyway, that personal digression to say that an undetermined number of family relationships and parental responsibilities could be better. Yours a case in point. Garth's first answer, though couched humorously, is a good one, I think. Your father had to know that you masturbate, and have been doing so for some years. Strange that he ignored that knowledge and insisted on insisting. What else would you likely be doing in your own locked bedroom. If he doesn't bring the subject up further, you could simply damper any embarrassment on the part of either of you (which shouldn't be there in any case) by going on normally as if the incident had not occurred. But why not take this opportunity, if you can manage it by easy degrees, to open up closer, more man-to-man communication with your father in all ways. He might well be relieved for you to take the lead. ~ As for your opportunities to jack off in your dorm, why few? If it's because of a roommate, that's another case where communication can help. It goes without saying that he masturbates too, and may feel as boxed-in as you. Just start the conversation and work out the logistics between you: closed room door, closed bathroom door, times when one or the other is in class...or, my chosen solution: be open with each other, discussing a solution, maybe trying it mutually or simply not observing the other when he feels the need. Communicate, communicate, communicate. Jacking with or in front of peers is quite a time-honored, common activity, and nothing to be bashful about so long as everyone involved agrees. Courage and good wishes, buddy...and much hassle-free satisfaction in future! [P.S. While I was writing this, several other voices have chimed in, covering some of the same territory and reinforcing some of my opinions. But I'll let it stand as is.]
     
    #8 karldergrosse, Mar 15, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2009
  9. Refresh7

    Refresh7 Member

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    ^ I communicate with my roommate about it, but with our schedules, it just doesn't work out like I need it too being that lately I've been a little excessive in the needs department. lol And I hate the idea of him opening the door while I'm in the middle of things, which is what my dad was on the verge of doing. lol

    And speaking of my dad and communication, a buddy of mine's dad, had walked in on him jerking off a little while ago too, but is now open with my friend and will give him playboys and will even chill and have a few beers while watching porn with him.(such a cliche), and they're really cool with it. Sadly enough, me telling my dad I was jerking off was probably the most emotionally-shedding/private thing I've told my dad in years if at all in my life. I'm a very private person and people are always telling me I should loosen up so I feel like I should take this time to be more cool about it and next time I'm watching porn or walk in on him watching (because it always happens) should I be more casual with my dad?
     
  10. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    Never had that kind of experience, but then my folks never burdened me with the kind of stuff about the dangers of "self abuse" my peers got. I assumed that my dad had discovered the joy and relief a bit ot hand work could give a young fellow and being a decent sort of fellow himself he did not in any way want to detract from such joys as his sons might be having.

    We all make the mistake, it seems to me, to credit our parents with less good sense about masturbation than we ourselves have. Respecting privacy cuts both ways: I never entered my parents' bedroom when the door was closed without knocking and they respected my privacy in the say way. And, no one ever asked what I was busying myself with.

    In any case, I see no need for embarrassment on your part. Your dad confirmed that his son is a sensual fellow (like himself) and that his son's "systems" are in good working order.

















    r
     
  11. Garth33

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    dude...we're trying to give you honest advice and you seem to be trying to steer this into a "should I jack off with my dad" thread and the answer to that is a definite "NO!"

    so what is it? Up to you man but don't jerk US around here...
     
  12. Refresh7

    Refresh7 Member

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    Whoa slow down. I was asking if I should be more verbally casual around my dad. He is aware of my business now and the only thing we have in common is that we don't emote often. I don't do the whole sharing thing and I don't know about other guys' relationships with their dads. You misunderstood me, and in full honesty, after looking at how I wrote what I did in I see how I could've misled you but that was not what I was trying to convey...
     
  13. 8060

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    This is my favorite part:

    Dude, this is your opportunity to flip the script with the communication with dad. I was younger than you are now when I started talking openly (like I do with my friends) with my dad about anything sexual. That's the kind of conversation he's having when he's not around you, with his friends. Maybe he's thinkin': Damn, I just wanna tell my son how I just fucked the hell out of whomever, or how bad I want to bust a nut, but I don't know how he'll take that from me:cool:. With this incident, you've been granted a pass to verbal sexual freedom around your biggest authorative figure in a protective environment to.

    So, when it's just the two of you, this is what you say (only a suggestion):

    Hey, Dad. Um, I don't smoke or do drugs. I don't drink because (take a short pause, contemplating look, clap your hands together and look him dead in his eye) I just don't. What I do do though is jerk off. And it was getting so good until you got to clankin' with the keys outside. Nobody else is even here. What could you have wanted so bad, Dad, that after you knock at the door (knowing I'm in here), I don't answer and you break out the keys? I don't have anything of yours in here other than some DNA swimming around in this dick that I'm trying to jerk off. So, what did you want?

    *

    When he says, "I wanted to know what you were doing," or even worse yet, "I didn't want nothing," put one hand on his shoulder, look at him very sincerely and calmly say:

    "Dad, I'm going to jerk off in my room behind my closed, locked door. You cheated me out of my last nut so I'm giving you a heads up so you don't come back with those keys. They wreck my concentration. Why don't you go bust a nut too & tell me about it later."

    What do you know? All of a sudden busting a nut sounds like a good idea to your dad & you've got this great new way of talking to him. Remember this was only a suggestion:cool:
     
    #13 8060, Mar 16, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2009
  14. nalbill

    nalbill New Member

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    Totally posted to generate responses to hopefully fuel the father/son fantasy bullshit. Good God - Next!
     
  15. karldergrosse

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    Refresh, you seem to respond directly to my post about you and your roommate--but you seem either to mistake or to intentionally avoid my meaning. When I say to communicate with him, I don't mean just to say that you masturbate and know that he does too...and too bad, so sad, we just can't do anything about our straitjacket situation. Reread: I'm saying that it is completely unnecessary for either of you to be held "hostage" by the other. Whether you need it more often than he does or not, just ask him to go on about his classwork while you go about your business on your bed or side of the room. I repeat: mutual masturbation or masturbating in the presence of the other (either watching or with back turned) is completely normal--nothing weird or perverse about it. I've seen it, I've done it (my long-time roommate was straight, but we were both cool with it, and it worked for both of us...and for many of our friends). I'll take any bet you want to place that by far the greater majority of men on this site (and anywhere else!) have done it at one time or another. That same old saying again: It's just a guy thing. Try to get comfortable with it. -- When posters here talk of a close father-son relationship, I doubt that any of us is in any way advising you to discuss the gritty details of actual practices, yours or your father's...and damn sure not encouraging mutual sexual activity of any sort with him. One's father is a support, a guide, a mentor--certainly not a jerkoff buddy or someone to exchange stories of sexual exploits with!!!
     
    #15 karldergrosse, Mar 16, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2009
  16. erratic

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    Wow, this thread went weird.

    OP, that was a perfect response to someone who was being way too invasive. If you're going to be nosy you get what you ask for.

    As for using this to have a more open relationship with your dad, why not? What else are you going to keep a secret from him? If you really do want to open up to your dad just do it the next time you two are alone together. Tell him about something important in your life. He's family. You say you don't emote much? Use your family to try emoting more. That's what family is for. Good luck.
     
  17. Viking_UK

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    Parents always assume the worst when it comes to their kids. He's probably relived to know that you weren't smoking or taking drugs and embarrassed at interrupting you, so chances are he'll give you a little more space now.

    Unless he says anything about it, just let the subject lie. By the way, he's probably told your mother about it too - or at least that she doesn't need to worry about you spending time alone in your room when you're home.
     
  18. musclemonkey5

    musclemonkey5 New Member

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    DEAR GOD, Yes pursue you dad for a better relationship. Hell no bring up the topic of masturbation again. He has been expecting this day for a long time, and was just a little shocked to realize it has come. Talking about sex with your father isn't the way to go about getting closer with him... unless you're trying to get in his pants, which I sincerely hope not.
    Is that Satan-damned simple enough for you people, stop giving him long shot fantasy crap advice!
     
  19. musclemonkey5

    musclemonkey5 New Member

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    ...unless you need to have 'the talk' with your father for clarification, but besides that..
     
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