I really don’t know what to do anymore

funkiesponge

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hi everybody, basically for the last 9 years I have been in a straight relationship. In December while at work I met this guy. We had a few drinks after work a couple of nights nothing more . Then we got chatting and basically we both realised that things weren’t right in our lives and we had this night of pure passion . The night after we both said that we need to leave our current partners . We spent a lot of time together he was living with her so he spent a lot of time with me at mine . To cut a long story short twe spent time together a lot and we basically fell for each other . We both told our family’s and came out to everybody . Everyone knows about us everybody is really good and I felt truly amazing . He made me feel loved , needed , happy ness everything. He moved in and we are just a normal gay couple . Now 4 months later things are starting to change , I feel so low. He is a serious gamer he spends all his time on it . I litterly do everything for him will do anything for him. I make all this effor for him and he doesn’t give me anything back . He is the most amazing person I have ever met the only person who has ever made me feel the way I do . He is also still in contact with his ex and it makes me anxious because I feel at the drop of a penny I will be dropped . They even meet up together . I give up everybody I knew, give up a friendship with my ex because I didn’t want him to feel how he is making me feel . But he doesn’t understand when I say to him how I feel. He says your my life you know where my priorities are , but I don’t feel they are with me. He isn’t from the same country as me so I understand he doesn’t know anybody else other than his ex and me and says it just friendship but he makes no effort to find friends either . I try for him but there is only so much I can do . When he was with his ex he said the reason it isn’t working with her is because she spends all of her time on the ex box speaking to her ex and yet he does the exact same thing to me. Thing is I love him so much I feel for him and now I feel I’m stuck in a situation that I don’t know what to do .
 

LatinoThong

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Well...
Sounds like you guys did every so fast, dating, moving in, loving, and you didn’t spend enough time to know each other.
First, congratulations because you came out of the closet, if you did it for him, well, that’s a nice prove of love.
Sounds like both of you are immigrants, I’m a immigrant too and sometimes, i felt so alone and i trying to make friend all the time, so, it sounds like he is going through an adjustment of his life and his feelings about his whole situation.
If you are already in this insecure situation about his feeling and who he really is, and you don’t trust him 100%. I think you should get ready for everything..
Get support of someone is really close to you, your friends even your family, talk about this.
You did what you felt you should do at the time when you move together, and don’t regret that, you are here already. And it’s ok tell yourself “I don’t want this and I don’t deserve this”. You deserve give to yourself the best of the best. And if this is killing you. You can started over.
 

funkiesponge

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Thank you for your reply . Thing is I worship the ground he walks on, I love my life with him and deep down I do trust him 100% with my life . The only reason I’m secure about things is because my past relationship was abusive. Emotion about has taken its tole on me . And tbh I haven’t got over it . I thought that when I was in this new relationship it would change everything but it just acted as a Temporary bandage. I live in the uk and he comes from another county so I’m at home and he isn’t. Thing is he doesn’t realise that I have no friends or anything because my past relationship didn’t allow for it . So where he goes off with his ex as friends he has sonbody else .
 

Gj816

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Well dude, it sound like you need to take charge of your own happiness. When he goes out to see his ex. Why don't you go out to the local pub and start making some new friends

It's not like you're going out to hook up you're going out to hopefully meet and make some new friends.
 
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He is not into it as much as you and I don’t think he wants a real relationship. I think it will eventually end. Sorry for being so damn blunt, I could be wrong.

It sounds one sided and sounds like he is comfortable keeping you on the hook.
 
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