I really hate myself for meeting guys sometimes...(((

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by nabludatelj, May 31, 2010.

  1. nabludatelj

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    I meet guys for some action, but it happens so rarely and I really hate myself for it.
    Just because I want something more than jerking off I do arrange a meeting with a guy to suck me off. Today it happened at the 5th time. OMG, where have been my brains. I really want to have sex with girls... and girls only but too shy to offer something to them... probably because I had action with guys only (oral sex and wanking). And afraid, if I fail.. (((
    argh... argh....argh.... so angry..
    Why do I keep doing that?
     
  2. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Why are you forcing yourself into a category? Can you not just accept that you are sexual and are attracted to men and women?
     
  3. crescendo69

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    I've just got to go straight so I can get all that male action, too.
     
  4. conchis

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    why the fuck don't you arrange a meeting with a girl? :confused:
     
  5. cklover

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    LOL...when will they ever learn?:rolleyes:
     
  6. nabludatelj

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    I can admit that I am attracted to guys some how. But why after all these meetings.. I have nothing except bad feelings. I do not really enjoy a time being with guy.. because I have something what worries me on the back of my mind...

    Today, I almost felt sick after that.
     
  7. D_Phallus P Phyllum

    D_Phallus P Phyllum New Member

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    No need to hate yourself, that won't help anyone.

    Girls can be a real pain in the ass. You'll find this out for yourself at some point, and then you'll miss this simpler time in your life when you get the occasional blow job off a stranger.
     
  8. TurkeyWithaSunburn

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    Because you're more than 1% gay. If you didn't like it you wouldn't be doing it.

    The sooner you accept that part of yourself the better off you'll be.
    (And more desirable and confident you will be in actually finding a girlfriend.)
     
  9. nabludatelj

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    Because I dont know.. how to arrange a meeting with a girl for sexual action only. To shy to do it in real life.

    I think I need to get a prostitute..)
     
  10. B_mitchymo

    B_mitchymo New Member

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    It would seem that there is something else interfering with your ability to accept yourself imo.
    Why are you feeling sick? What is it exactly making you feel like that?
     
  11. nabludatelj

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    If I am more than 1% gay, why do I feel sick after all these meetings?))..

    I know that I am doing that just because it is easier to pick up a guy than a girl..in my situation)
     
  12. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    I understand how you are feeling. When I was in denial of being gay many moons ago I felt as you describe each time I met a guy.

    You need to try and chill and be less hard on yourself. You say you are attracted to guys yet you do not enjoy it when you meet up with guys. You need to be honest with yourself about what you enjoy and what you are looking for.

    I don't mean to come across as preachy. I just want to help you discover yourself and be comfortable with what you discover.
     
  13. D_Harry_Crax

    D_Harry_Crax Account Disabled

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    I have no idea why you hate yourself. In fact, I have no idea why anyone ever has negative emotions (hate, anger, depression, regret, etc.) after consensual sex with another adult, as long as each party treated the other well from start to finish. I have NEVER had a negative emotion after sex. Mine have ranged from satisfied curiosity to satisfied balls to simple pleasure to outright joy, even sometimes a little humor (laughing only at myself, not the other guy).
     
  14. D_Harry_Crax

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    Also, nablud, I can tell why guys are lining up to suck your cock. I would.
     
  15. nabludatelj

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    Dont know.. to be honest...
    Because of the feeling that I am doing something that is really really disgusting for me, but I am doing this anyway ((
     
  16. TurkeyWithaSunburn

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    Then stop doing it. :tongue: or address what is going in the back of your mind. :smile:

    Go for what you actually want, it saves on ruminating why you went after what you really didn't want.
     
  17. B_mitchymo

    B_mitchymo New Member

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    Are you english born?
     
  18. nabludatelj

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    The problem is... that I do not deny the fact that I am attracted to guys...it is ok for me... BUT... I do not understand.. why do I meet them if everything that's happening between me and other guy is so disgusting for me after. and I really regret about it.
    I know for sure that I am not 100% gay. I think I would not feel in this way otherwise.
     
  19. Florida Boy

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    Sounds like you've got baggage. Baggage that you've created and use as a crutch. None of that is working to your advantage. Apparently, you are not shy propositioning a guy for a blow job. The same skills work with girls. I think, however, that you are already aware of that.

    Bottom line, the next time you arrange a blow job stay a while longer and get to know the person, male or female.
     
  20. nabludatelj

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    LOL..)) why did u ask this question..?)))

    English is not my native language.)
     
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