I really need advice...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by schwulboy1989, Oct 12, 2009.

  1. schwulboy1989

    schwulboy1989 Active Member

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    It's been almost 7 months since my boyfriend (of 18 months) and I broke up, but every time I try getting back on the dating scene, as soon as it becomes serious I panic and run. I don't know how to start trusting guys again, and I don't know how to meet guys, either...:confused:

    I'm too afraid of STDs to random hookups, and I don't know any gay guys that would hook up if I wanted to...:crazy2:

    Any advice? we can talk here, or on yahoo...just put in the message "lpsg RDJ"

    Thanks, guys!
    -Chris
     
  2. schwulboy1989

    schwulboy1989 Active Member

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  3. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

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    Maybe you just need a bit more time to recover from the last relationship. You said when it starts to get serious you run. Just be honest with yourself and the new people that you meet and say, "I'm getting over my last relationship and not ready to start something new right now." A dinner date and a movie and a roll in the hay is not a relationship or a commitment.
    You will start trusting others again when you are comfortable with being in a relationship again. Meanwhile there is nothing wrong with dating around. I did it for years until I settled down.
    I don't know where you live but you can meet new people almost anywhere, at work, school on line at the supermarket, I met someone after they rear ended my car on the 405 once. Give yourself some time and don't be too hard on yourself.
     
  4. schwulboy1989

    schwulboy1989 Active Member

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    thanks NY :)
     
  5. D_Harry_Nutz

    D_Harry_Nutz New Member

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    If you are afraid of STDs and stuff, make sure you get to know the person you are going out with for a while. Get to know if they are the type of person to be sleeping with other guys or not; you might be lucky and end up being someone's first.
     
  6. schwulboy1989

    schwulboy1989 Active Member

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    i mean...i understand that there are condoms, and that as long as i ask, it should be fine...

    but i really don't want like aids or herpes or something crazy like that...or anything, for that matter...
     
  7. D_Sawyer Wiener

    D_Sawyer Wiener Account Disabled

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    I don't like hook ups either... the whole used feeling afterward kinda sucks. I may be in a completely different situation than you are right now but I can empathize... I'd really like to find someone to start dating or start a relationship with but I have NO idea where to even begin to find people... I mean I've gotten PMs suggesting Craigslist or Manhunt.net... HA no way! I already have horror stories of those places... I'm extremely paranoid about STDs as well so idk what to tell ya for that other than play safe.
     
  8. helgaleena

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    Dating and sex are actually two different things. Make friends with your own hand and don't pressure yourself to have sex so very fast. If someone cant respect your saying 'I'm not ready' they are not going to respect the rest of your personality either.
     
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