I think I fckd up

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Ari_Hola, Jul 23, 2011.

  1. D_Ari_Hola

    D_Ari_Hola Account Disabled

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    I dont know for sure but I think I might have just fckd thinks up with my best friend. The other night we were smoking and we started to jack off weve never done this before but we were both high (hes straight) and I didnt think anything of it and well neither did he. We started watching straight porn and he brought up the topic of me sucking his dick of course I wanted to but I didnt say yes or no I just kept jacking off. I really didnt know if he was joking because he said it in a kind of serious way. Then he said hell suck mine if I sucked his first I didnt say no just that he do it to me first. He then asked if he could fuck me in the ass and that he was so horny and he grabbed my ass several times. It didnt leed to sex so I pushed it a little I started touching his stomach and grabbing his ass to see how far hell let me go but he just laughed and pushed me away. He showed me his dick and it was at least 7in semi and it turned me on he was definitely bigger then me im only 5 1/2 hard and I showed him because he wanted to compare. So I kept touching him never his dick but I think I just over did it. I dont know how he took it when we sobered up, I stayed the night and we didnt talk about it at all in the morning we just acted like nothing happend but it did feel a little different but nothing big. Its just he doesnt know im gay and I feel like I pushed it a little to far, hes straight and I dont know how he will handle me being gay and after last night I feel like he knows its just hes my best friend and we do everything together and I really hope this doesnt come between our friendship I just hate that something so stupid like me being gay could ruin our friendship
     
  2. WillyLong

    WillyLong Active Member

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    This is like Superman thinking that a pair of glasses will hide his true identity. Dude, he knows you're gay. Because he's straight <wink, wink>, while none of his friends or family are looking, he wants you to be the woman so he can be the man. If that's what you want, go for it. If you feel you deserve better, someone who both identifies as gay and wants to have gay sex with you, then you know what you have to do.
     
  3. helgaleena

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    He wants to stay in the closet is all. Are you okay with him lying about it like that? Would that fck with your friendship in other areas? Or do you want to just keep playing it by ear and enjoying each other without slapping labels on each other? The stuff he's asking you to do is not 'straight'. If he considers himself straight and still does those things, he's like a lot of guys in denial. No matter what sex things you do, he's still the same guy. And he wants to keep calling it 'friendship', too. Maybe he thinks you are going to find a chick someday, and it will not be a big deal if you do not get around to that. You'll still be the same guy too.
     
  4. Gecko4lif

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    Yeah no straight man would ever do that. He is in denial.

    Only question now is do you want to pull him out or wait
     
  5. UKPianoBoy

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    Good luck. I wish you well in your situation. Percentages and labels hold you back. Be organic and a decent being first. Preferences do not define anyone.
     
  6. D_Ari_Hola

    D_Ari_Hola Account Disabled

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    I know what yall mean its just that i know hes straight he likes girls I just get so confused because hell do gay stuff to me and when I do it back ohh im automatically gay its like what the fuck and I try not to make a big deal about it and just play it off as nothing...... Its just were at the point in our friendship where we tell each other everything and I feel like I cant tell him im gay I dont want to tell him so we can fuck I just want him to accept me
     
  7. spoon

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    i think he probably knows your gay. and, as everyone else has mentioned he's in denial. once a friendship has crossed into having sex it can be a slippery slope. (no i wasn't trying to be funny.)
     
  8. spoon

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    and, no i don't think you fucked anything up!
     
  9. D_Ari_Hola

    D_Ari_Hola Account Disabled

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    And thats what I dont want to happen I keep thinking if I would have just come out and said it yeah lets fuck and we did what would happen next do I really want to chance it just so I can get some dick.

    It just makes me mad that im afraid to come out to him, I mean if he is my best friend why should it mater if im gay or straight
     
  10. helgaleena

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    Just because he likes girls doesn't make the stuff he was doing with you 'straight'. You don't have to tell him anything. Just keep doing whatever it is you do and see what comes of it. He's bi at the very least, doing that kind of stuff, but maybe he doesn't want to talk about it, just do it.
     
  11. rbkwp

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    DONT SWEAT IT Matey i think he will be cool with it all..
    think your just over worrying yourself
    his hinting along sexual lines i think is good, maybe he has no Gay inclinations at all, either way i have an inkling he will be an even better friend to you once things get established between yas

    Thanks for the clear explanation i can almost see similar happenings with myself and str friends from way back.
    Nothing major comes of it. all good clean youngster fun
    all the BEST
    enz
     
  12. helgaleena

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    ^^^ this. :wink:
     
  13. BarelyMoreThan6

    BarelyMoreThan6 New Member

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    Since he was the one kind of pushing your buttons on the sex stuff, I don't think it matters to him. He enjoys your company and will continue to. Forget the labels, other than the one that says your BEST FRIENDS of course.
     
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