Do you think Valentine's Day has made all these feelings come to the fore again? Because you seemed to be getting a little better before this round of posts.
I'm not really sure what to say to you except to offer hugs. (I'll let the other women do the necessary ass kicking :tongue
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It gets better. It really does. People always feel like crap after a break up, even the break up and the relationship AREN'T messy ones. It takes time before things start to feel better again, but it always does get better.
Unlike Emjay, I don't think that you should forgive her. To me forgiveness always seems too much like saying what they did was okay. But you do need to figure out how to let go and move on.
To really heal, only time will help, but there are things you can do in the meantime. Learn how to love and value yourself. I think the best way to do this is to spend time communicating or hanging out with other people. Listen to the good things they say about you. Even if you don't feel they are true, the people saying the good things obviously believe what they are saying. If you accept that others really feel that way about you, over time you will begin to really believe there is some truth in the things they say.
I would usually suggest fucking someone else (not dating someone else - that wouldn't be fair considering where your mind is at the moment). But having read a few of your posts, I realise that probably wouldn't be right for you (still might be worth a try though). Just make sure you are honest with the woman if you do decide to try this route.
And FFS, your ex still OWNS you! The obsessive thinking about her, the strong emotions, they all mean that you are still allowing her to have a much bigger place in your life and your heart than she deserves. You need to deal with that, because it is eating you up inside. A way that I have found works for me is rather similar to something Emjay suggested. Give yourself a set time of day when you can think about her (maybe before you go to sleep at night). Spend this time remembering and analysing. Think about the bad stuff, but think about the good stuff too. Most importantly, remind yourself why it would never have worked out between the two of you. The rest of the day, if you start thinking about her - STOP! Think about something else! Actively change what you are thinking about. At first it won't be easy, but it will get easier the more you practice. Eventually you will find that you don't think about her nearly as much.
And no girl seems to like you anymore? Are you serious? I have no idea what your personality is like in person, but you seem like a nice enough guy (if with some issues). And you are gorgeous!!! As I have said before :redface:. I have no doubt the girls like you.
Remember that it does get better.