Hey guys. Some of you asked for an update on everything, so this is long over due. My bad
As much as I’d like to report that we hit it off, sorry to disappoint. Nothing has really happened between us since my last post, but some other interesting things have happened since.
Within the past couple weeks we have started hanging out more often than we ever did. I think this is partly because of my persistence with him and he’s finally starting to cave. We are actually in the same group as each other again to make our next film so I’m seeing him quite frequently. About two weeks ago we started working out together on random days, and on several occasions he’s invited me back up to his place after making his friends leave (ok, so he’s invited me up
every time). We’ve spent hours on his porch just shooting the shit, and he’s started opening up to me and telling me things that he doesn’t even tell his best friends in class.
One afternoon we were planning on working out and he told his other friends to meet at 6.30 but he told me to come whenever. I got there about 30 minutes early, and one of the first things he said to me was “ok, so no one else is going to be here until 6.30. Let’s go have gay sex.” I was quite shocked at what he said at first, but he just smiled and I said “ok!” and just laughed. Unfortunately we didn’t have sex haha, but we ended up just talking more. On one occasion before that we had gotten back from the gym and his friend was still at his place. We all talked for a while, and I couldn’t help but notice him staring at me through the corner of my eye. As soon as I made eye contact with him he would just look away. More recently a couple in our class has recently had a violent break up and he’s been talking to me about the girl. The way he talks about her makes me think that he’s developing a bit of an infatuation for her but he doesn’t want to make a move just yet because of what just happened between her and her ex. I’ve asked him several times “do you like her?” to which he just stares at his cigarette for ages and finally says, “I don’t know.” It’s weird because not too long ago he told me that every time he speaks to her he becomes less and less attracted to her, and then his story completely changes. He told me about how on set they’re always “catching each other’s stare,” which sounded all too familiar to me because the same thing happened between him and I several months prior.
Just last night he invited me to go to the movies. He didn’t say that other people would be going, but I knew there would be. I knew for a fact that he invited that girl so I made a point to ask if I could bring a girl I knew (I didn’t want to end up being 3rd wheel for the evening). My friend and I got out there early and he soon arrived on his own (looking hot as ever, I might add). We asked him what he wanted to eat, and he looked at me and said (in a serious way) “I want a bit of **** (me)…” my friend was surprised but it was quickly dismissed. We sat down and had a bite to eat before the others arrived and he asked me to go on vacation with him to Asia over the summer with him and his friend. Naturally I said yes, although we’ll have to see what happens. She later arrived with two other friends from our class and naturally he started to shift more of his attention on to her. We sat next to each other in the movies as well but we barely talked. Afterwards we all went our separate ways and I took my friend home. When I was half way back to my place I had my phone out contemplating whether to text him and see if he wanted to hang out for a bit, but before I could even type out a message my phone started to ring and it was him! (Perfect timing perhaps?) He wanted me to go over to his place and have a beer, so of course I obliged. We talked way in to this morning, but he was just telling me more about the girl in our class and I was only catching half of what he was saying due to lack of interest. Last night got me thinking though – could he just be starting to trust me more and thus he’s considering me more of a friend? I find it odd that he’s telling me all these things rather than his best friends. He’s actually asked me not to tell people about what we talk about, and when I bring up the girl in our class in public he makes gestures to tell me to not say anything. I actually asked him about why he’s trusting me and he just told me that God gave him the ability to make accurate assumptions about people and that I’m a “good, great guy.” After I left I sent him a message telling him that I haven’t been 100% truthful with him and that next time we hang out I have something to tell him. I’m debating whether I’m going to make the right choice telling him how I’ve felt about him, but I figured it would give me closure so I can move on. That, and I don't expect a negative response, even if he doesn't feel the same way.
During a party the other night we had all been drinking and he pulled me to one side and asked me to take him home later that night. I found that odd as well since he drove himself and he lived less than a mile away from the party, and he didn’t seem too out of it at all. I figured this would be the time if anything were to happen. I took him home and before he got out of my car he leaned over to me and gave me a hug while pressing his head against my arm. I figured if anything were to happen between us it would have been then and there since we were both inebriated. It didn’t, and I took that as a sign that nothing will happen. The thought that he might be using me crossed my mind as well.
So yeah, that is kind of it in a nutshell. I didn’t want to write another novel this time, but I figured I’d skim the surface on what’s been happening between us. I still feel like I’m getting signals from him, but now I’m positive that I’m seeing and hearing what I want to see and hear. It also doesn’t help how other people in my class have insisted that they think he’s gay as well. Maybe he’s covering it up? Maybe he isn’t gay? Maybe he’s bi? I don’t know.
