If Mccain wins...(NOT A POLITICAL THREAD)

Discussion in 'Politics' started by marleyisalegend, Sep 8, 2008.

  1. marleyisalegend

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    I don't wanna discuss the candidats or policies or anything. BUT....... if Mccain wins I will sign my life over as a sex slave to the first person who sends me a one-way ticket out of North America.

    My hobbies include suckin' dick, giving head, and especially orally pleasuring a man's penis. And lickin' balls. And I can cook too.
     
  2. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Sorry, ml, but nobody believes that kind of statement isn't political.
     
  3. cockoloco

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    Do not fear, Marley. You'll be welcome here in South America.:cool:

    You won't need to do the cooking so... um... we'll have fun! Yeah!
     
  4. marleyisalegend

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    What I meant was I didn't want this to be hijacked into a "Mccain said this" and "Obama said that" and "Palin smells funny" and "Obama is elitist" thread.

    This is about my sweet cocoa booty cheeks and the nasty, raunchy, sweaty, smutty, slutty things I'll do to whoever decides to give a brotha a helping hand.

    See! That's what I'm talkin' about. Never been to South America, sounds like it'll be a trip.

    Yes sir indeed. Did I mention that I enjoy sucking penis?
     
    #4 marleyisalegend, Sep 8, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 8, 2008
  5. cockoloco

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    How could you forget that detail! Not only you do it, you enjoy it!
     
  6. B_starinvestor

    B_starinvestor New Member

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    I'll be happy to kick in for your plane ticket to South America
     
  7. marleyisalegend

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    Here's my resume.

    Enthusiastic Dick Sucker​

    1. I can suck dick from behind. Get the guy in a buck and pull his dick behind him, between his legs.

    2. I have worked with a wide variety of food products. Chocolate-covered strawberries, ice cream, a Mcdonald's Mcflurry, honey, peanut butter, Starbursts, Motion Lotion, etc...

    3. I am very good at suckin' a dude off while he tosses my salad.

    4. I enjoy suckin' dick while the guy is driving.

    5. I have many jerking techniques at my disposal, all of which involve stimulating the major erotic zones with both hands, usually multi-tasking. Right above the buttcrack, between the anus and balls (landing zone), the testicles, the chest, nipples, right above the pubic line, behind the knee, thights, etc...

    6. 4 Years experience, never once had a client go soft on me.

    7. I can make guys shoot across the room, toes curl, eyes roll back, muscles tighten, and this is BEFORE you cum.

    I have many wonderful services to offer and have had metal plates inserted into my knees so you don't have to worry about them wearing out.

    Hmm, I'll have to share my services with you AND Coco. I'm up for the challenge, one at a time is boring sometimes anyway. I have two hands and two holes so I'm sure we'll find a way to occupy all of the above.
     
  8. Qua

    Qua
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    If McCain wins I'll be worrying about finding a good job in a couple years and investing in a bomb shelter. If Obama wins....I'll be worrying about finding a good job in a couple years and investing in foreign bank accounts.

    I don't think there's much reason to fret Marley. 4 years of McCain will be much kinder to your ass and balls than 4 more years of Bush.
     
  9. marleyisalegend

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    Here's a good joke I heard on the train; what's the difference between GW Bush and Mccain.....NOTHING!

    If you send me that plane ticket you can be as hard to my ass and balls as you want.
     
  10. dcw4

    dcw4 Member

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    marley,
    i live in Seattle, Canada.
    We have recently decended(?) to Canada, really,
    dont bother to check the facts, just believe me.
    I will need your address to send the tickets.
    Cant wait!
    dcw4
     
  11. marleyisalegend

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    Sweet! Looks like I've got some good prospects. I don't care about first class, I don't care if I'm flying amongst caged chickens, I don't care if the pilot is drunk, I just want to get outta here ASAP. Definitely willing to return the favor tenfold....Well, I'm not quite that flexible yet, but I'm workin' on it. I can definitely get my legs up onto your shoulder.
     
  12. dcw4

    dcw4 Member

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    i will have tyson beckford here too, just
    waiting for us!

    dcw4
     
  13. cockoloco

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    Marley, u iz miiiiiiiiineeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    LMAO!

    Hahaha, I can share from time to time too.
     
  14. marleyisalegend

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    ^Oh goodness, I may have to split my time between Canada (dc and Tyson) and South America (coco and starinvestor). All this culture is making me horny.
     
  15. dcw4

    dcw4 Member

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    CALL ME!
    Tyson and me want to have phone sex with you!

    I got the biggest,,, crush on you,,

    dcw4
     
  16. B_New End

    B_New End New Member

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    LoL
    Fucking great!
     
  17. marleyisalegend

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    Okay. Of course I'm going to have to visit you guys BEFORE the election, just to make sure I'm going to be in good hands. Remind me to bring my cocoa butter lotion, massage oils, fruit roll-ups (you'll understand why after I cuff you to the bed), handcuffs, and Doritos (in case I get hungry).
     
  18. cockoloco

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    I have all that here. You just need to bring your toothbrush. Underwear is optional.

    I just ran out of cocoa butter lotion. I have vanilla, is that ok?
     
  19. marleyisalegend

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    I'm thinking about doing a live webcast of my new lives in Canada and South America. I have to think of a dirty, suggestive, innuendo-filled title though.

    I'll bring three. One for my teeth, the other two are for....nevermind, it's a surprise.

    Underwear, what's that?:confused:

    Sure, that'll do. Is vanilla the scent or the flavor? Is this edible? I need that kinda information before I go sticking things in my mouth that don't belong there.
     
    #19 marleyisalegend, Sep 8, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 8, 2008
  20. cockoloco

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    ^Yep, highly edible. I don't use it much because it makes people want to bite. But we'll manage.

    For your webcast, what about: (It's a bit improvised)

    Marley: The pleasures of going down and up.

    It's a bit tacky, but what the hell...
     
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