If your genitals could talk...

Intrigue

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well the cock would think he's in charge while the balls feel like they do al the work! And they would talk like a grumpy old Jewish couple. The cock always fussing at the balls for getting in the way. And the balls at the cock fr never getting them a raincoat. They always end up soaked! ;-)
 

D_Tim McGnaw

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My dick would speak Galician. It would quote 15th century Aragonese love poems and seduce you with it's mellifluous charm.

I mean come on, if I can't be then natural justice dictates that my dick should be a smooth muthafucka.
 

D_LeonardoDeCrapio

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Among others.....

"Ahh it burns like razors."
"Don't stick me in there, it's warm and sticky"
"Bengay makes condoms..?"

"Please, shave me, I'm being smothered down here."
"Where is my cell phone, I'm so tweeting about her piercing."
"I wonder who I'm going into tonight..?"

"Nice to meet, you, my name is penis! What's yours?" "Oh vagina, that's a pretty name."
~ Plunges in~


"Great, more lotion."
"I just had sexxxx, and it fellttt sooo gooodd... Felt sooo gooooood. I got put, inside of her." ~Mean while the Lonely Island & Akon instrumental plays in the background, whilst white fireworks explode in the background~

"In all 50 states it's illegal to put a bag over someones head, hey ass hole! Tell your girlfriend to poke a hole in it so I can have some breathing room."
 

LaFemme

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Mine sounds like Marilyn Monroe and she has a breathless giggle when tickled - but she is secretly very smart. She shivers with pleasure when stroked the right way and her silky softness is feminine and welcoming. And she always asks for what she wants.
 

sleepiboi

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They would be in a calm happy voice at first saying "Thank you for taking care of me by giving me free haircuts, and oil/lotion massages."

It would then proceed into yelling at me saying "WHY HAVEN'T YOU HAD SEX YET! I WANT TO BE USED! IT'S LIKE HAVING A CAR AND NOT DRIVING IT! STICK ME IN SOMETHING!" I think at this point...lol
 

D_Budd_Hert

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WTF !!!!! just because your a SadoMasochist doesn't mean I am ! Get these damn piercings out of me and quit trying to stick your finger down my throat ( Danny Devito as narrator )