If Your Straight-ish How Do You Signal Interest To A Guy?

dmigrant

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I am dad like, in the closet. I tend to prefer 25-30 year old Wally Cleaver types. Just nice smooth guys who are normal but like men. A friend got hit on at a family gathering. Just that kind of guy came up to him, started talking, and basically said 'I would like to play with you". My friend went back to the younger guys hotel, they had a great time. My friend bottomed for the first time in 20 years. The younger guy spent about 45 mins giving him a nice range of slow fucking.

Since I am in the closet, I am cautious about how to connect in person. I like the surprise of interest. Its easy to find on Grindr, but in person like a bar or event, its nice if a guy shows interest and it leads to a nice connection.

How do I know, signal, or exhibit the kind of sign that starts the connection?
 

dmigrant

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Seriously???
Sorry. Really what I mean that are quiet young men who don't pontificate and act out. Who are not super political. People interested in others, study hard, good education, are making it through society without a lot of hassle. Don't do drugs. Emotionally strong. Quiet alpha.
 
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A friend got hit on at a family gathering. Just that kind of guy came up to him, started talking.. its nice if a guy shows interest and it leads to a nice connection.

How do I know, signal, or exhibit the kind of sign that starts the connection?

I think you know the answers. It is the same with any other sort of person. You chat with them, laugh at their jokes, show interest, buy them a drink.. Careful with touching though. Some people don't like that boundary crossed for a bit.

Someone who is being flirted with will know it.

The issue I think you are having is actually doing it. You know what to do, but it's taking that step to let someone know you are interested that is making you pause.
 

Brodie888

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The chances of finding a gay man to have sex with you randomly in public is small. So the amount of sex would be infrequent.

My suggestion would be to find a gay sauna or known beat if you don't want to use the apps.
 
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dfw051980

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So if you meet a guy you suspect is gay and you want to pursue something with them my advice is

1st off be extremely nice and friendly. Make it so the other guy feels comfortable being himself around you and you aren't threatening.
Smile and make eye contact, laugh. make sure they get a sense you are comfortable.

2nd. Compliment them. if they work workout mention that they look like they work out, or tell them you like the way they dress or something. Or if they seem like a fun person make sure to tell them that.

3rd and i think this is the most important step into snagging a guy. LET THEM SEE YOU CHECKING THEM OUT. If you find them attractive look at them, check out the goods. And when they see you looking, smile. Dont look away. If they return a smile your way you definitely got them lol.
After that (now all this depends on the situation and the environment you are in). If you are in a bar or social gathering stand close to them, do some subtle physical touching... like if they are standing next to you let your arms touch. Do the old buddy shoulder pat/grab that straight guys do lol. But subtle again keep it friendly, don't be to aggressive with all this.
Also if you see them checking you out make sure to give em a show lol. Leer them in with showin off your assets. Maybe scratch your chest underneath your shirt so you can flash a little bit of skin, if you lock eyes during this again smiling is the most important key. Now if you want to rush along the sexual flirtation (like you trying to hookup sooner rather than later). Keeping your hands around your crotch area is def a signal to wanting to have some immediate fun... if you do a quick grabbing of your crotch while hes looking at you will definitely speed things along hehe.

Lastly when it comes to conversing be friendly and be yourself and make sure they know you are a pretty chill person to be around and if the subject of what you like to do for fun or in your spare time always respond with a phrase like "Im pretty open when it comes to having fun". A subtle way of saying hey if it comes to sex im pretty open. (avoiding saying cliche things like I have a bunch of gay friends, or gay guys always hit on me. unless you are already friends with the person this could be seen as a turn off).
again all this depends on the environment. I wouldnt necessarily do a crotch grab in the store lol.
But key take aways Smile, be friendly and keep eye contact (either looking at their face or body).
 

dfw051980

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I think you know the answers. It is the same with any other sort of person. You chat with them, laugh at their jokes, show interest, buy them a drink.. Careful with touching though. Some people don't like that boundary crossed for a bit.

Someone who is being flirted with will know it.

The issue I think you are having is actually doing it. You know what to do, but it's taking that step to let someone know you are interested that is making you pause.

agree with this poster. Pay atttention to the clues that the person you are into are throwing out. If they are returning your smiles, laughing at your jokes, they look comfortable being around you then you got a good chance they are into you.

Here's one thing. If you are in a bar or something and either you or the other person is with a bunch of people ask the person you are interested in "if they would like to go to the bar and get a drink". Doing that gets you 1 on1 time with the person and any flirtation can be done with more privately and discreetly.