I'm a straight man... I just love men.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_orleandersee, Jul 15, 2010.

  1. B_orleandersee

    B_orleandersee New Member

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    does that make sense? because right now thats how i feel.. i feel like an extremely sheltered straight man who likes other men who preferably are straight.. not so interested in gay..

    i have never and will never touch a woman and i've only ever been with men.. still, i feel just like a straight man into other straight men.
     
  2. marky08

    marky08 New Member

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    hi, im straight man who like you prefer staright man..
     
  3. maxcok

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    So you like having sex with men, and you have absolutely no sexual interest in women.

    Are we missing something? How exactly are you "straight"? :rolleyes:

    It sounds like you don't want to identify as gay, even though you are.

    To answer your question, no, it does not make sense.
     
  4. B_RedDude

    B_RedDude New Member

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    I guess to some guys, the label, even if it's unambiguously accurate, is frightening, but sucking some guys cock, or getting fucked by him, is not.

    Why is that? Could it be that some people care too much about what other people think?

     
  5. EnglishMan

    EnglishMan Well-Known Member

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    You are a gay man, who has not come to terms or accepted who or what he is.

    If you look like a duck and quack like a duck...guess what?

    You obviously see gay and straight as two completely different things, when you say 'not so interested in gay.'

    But not all gay men are interested in show tunes, cooking and the latest womens fashions.

    Some gay men even like sport.

    You say you will never touch a woman and have only been with men, which makes you as 'gay' as anyone on this list.
     
  6. v32bone

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    Just enjoy how you feel and don't worry about labeling yourself. Consider yourself sexual and don't worry what anyone else labels you. Life is too short to spend endless time worried about such things.
     
  7. EnglishMan

    EnglishMan Well-Known Member

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    P.S. The 'straight men' you are having sex with are probably not as 'straight' as you think.
     
  8. flame boy

    flame boy Account Disabled

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    Interesting assessment, may I ask what makes you believe you are straight? Being defined by ones sexuality is not something many people wish for -- but there certainly does come a point when one must evaluate their situation. You have only ever slept with men and are only interested in having relations with the same sex - this is what being a homosexual is.

    You don't have to come flying out of the closet but If I was in your situation, I would really look at my life and try to come to terms with who I really am. It would be a shame to live a whole life as something you are not.

    You may find other men who say "Yup, I'm straight too" - does this somehow provide comfort or solace that what you are doing sexually is somehow not gay? As others have said, these men are most likely saying this for the same reasons you are.

    There's nothing wrong with being gay, you don't have to shout it from the rooftops, but it would be a great shame if you didn't look at who you truly are. Some people say "so what, labels are stupid" - which to a degree is true, but (in my opinion about your situation) living a lie is not something that is is healthy or encouraged.

    Really interesting topic.
     
  9. crescendo69

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    I'm the king of Siam.
     
  10. B_orleandersee

    B_orleandersee New Member

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    I really don't know how I came to think of this.. it's just really how I feel.. like an epiphany. I really don't know what the hell i feel about this right now and i just confused my own self which is weird.. i dunno, i mean, i like men.. love em.. i love a nice fat juicy cock and some hairy balls to go along with it i just don't feel gay.. i don't mean 'gay' as in the lifestyle.. i dunno.. so this means i'm gay pretty much? i don't dislike fashion or aerobics or dance music or anything.. im not identifying with the lifestyle.. i dunno what im identifying with i guess im identifying with everything that 'gay' is.. history wise, culturally wise etc.. i make no sense, i know that.. very interesting... it interesting because i've never really had to 'come out'.. someone else did it for me.. i told them and in turn, they told everybody else and threatened to beat them up if they gave me any shit about it so i.......... holy hell this is way too much philosophizing for one day. i need a beer,
     
  11. maxcok

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    You need a coming out gay support group, and if you're lucky, some supportive friends.

    Good luck.
     
  12. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Well lucky for you being a homosexual doesn't change who you are as a person, you remain whoever you want to be and have to make no real changes of who you are to accommodate your desire for men.

    You don't have to identify with the baggage of being gay, you should just be honest with yourself, because if you can't be honest with yourself then who can you be honest with?

    It's not something to fear either, there are so many worse things you might have to come to terms with in life, being honest with yourself about your sexuality and moving on from that are really simple, well at least they are once you've done so even if they seem like huge issues at the time.

    Being gay doesn't change who you are as a man. If you have a personality and life you're happy with now, calling yourself gay and admitting the guys you have sex with are also likely gay or bisexual isn't going to make you change those things.
     
  13. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

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    I love steak, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm a vegetarian and only want to eat steak with other vegetarians. I'd never go to a backyard barbecue with real meat-eaters.
     
  14. invisibleman

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    I'm a straight man... I just love men.
    It doesn't make any sense to me. Good luck. :confused:
     
  15. swiss_stallion

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    I think i can understand. Only the words don't make sense. But i think i understand what you mean! I always say, i'm not gay, but i love men. But of course I'm gay. I had my coming out with 18 years old. everybody know me as gay. I live in a relationship with my husband since 13 years and we get "married" last year. I am as gay as gay can be.

    maybe its the question if you identify yourself only over your sexual orientation. I do not! I am what I am and my sexuality is just a part of me and not the only aspect who makes my personality. I'm not "a homosexual". I am me! Homosexuality is a part of my life but not what makes me who i am!

    Maybe that makes sence for you guys outthere? sorry since my english is not perfect its always hard to describe my thougts...hope you get what i mean... :)
     
  16. NCbear

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    I think the OP and the last poster on this thread share something: They want to be known as people who happen to be gay, not gay people (with the adjective always and inevitably coloring the noun, somehow making it different from the norm).

    In some ways, I share this feeling. I'm a human being first--a citizen of the galaxy, in Robert Heinlein's novel's memorable title. Secondary to me are gender, skin color, sexual orientation, geographic considerations, ethnicity, religiosity, and so forth.

    Yes, it would indeed be nice to, as the OP says, be gay without having to be "gay" in the same cultural ways others are gay. And to have others understand that you are in a long-term relationship with another man but that you're not what most people think of when they think of "gay." Not the stereotypical professions, not the stereotypical mannerisms, not any of that.

    But in the middle of "that's not me," I also tend to spare at least one thankful thought appreciating the efforts of those who went before me who smoothed my way--typically, those "gay" or "queer" types (those "sexual outlaws") who pushed the envelope of what "gay" could mean so that I could be more comfortable being myself. I thank those drag queens at the Stonewall for being so out and so brave. I appreciate those flaming guys and butch girls who don't hide--who live the stereotype every day and act as a lightning rod protecting me so that I don't have to feel as strongly what they undoubtedly feel several times a day: the intense hatred directed against difference in this society.

    So I don't "blame the victim" by hating to be around incredibly over-the-top gay men and women. Instead, I tell them how brave I think they are, and I congratulate them--often in front of homophobes, if I can--for dealing with homophobic bullshit every day of their lives.

    After all, their presence has made my kind of homosexuality seem more normal--which benefits me tremendously by deflecting some of that hatred.

    I suppose I'm saying to the OP that you don't have to be "gay" in the same ways other men are gay, and you don't have to behave the same way culturally, but you do need to realize that your freedom to choose another kind of gayness comes from stereotypical gays' and lesbians' bravery in being out and proud.

    NCbear (who tries to treat everyone as a worthwhile person who has earned his or her time on this earth)
     
  17. swiss_stallion

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    Wow, dear NCbear

    you absolutely get the point i was trying to say! And I'm even very thankfull all the brave gay men and lesbians who fight before us to make it possible for us to live our lifes more open and free! And i also go to the CSD in Z├╝rich to show up and say "im here" and i love man.

    Me and my husband live in a very small village in Switzerland with only 470 citizens. Most Swiss people are quit open minded and we live there without any homophobia crap to deal with. And thats because others have brought homosexuality into awareness of mankind. But i know, that is not possible everywhere. In a lot of african and arabian countries beeing gay is a horror! Even in some "civilized" regions of our planet its not easy living as openly gay. I hope this will change someday!

    Thank you NCbear for sharing your thouhgts and posting this in such good words!
     
  18. B_orleandersee

    B_orleandersee New Member

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    I second Swiss.. thank you NCBear.. I couldn't find a bear.. so I'm having wine.. I'm having wine for breakfast.. I dunno what the hell just happened this morning I just feel like my reality came crashing down for a short minute.. I guess I couldn't put it into words though NCBear and Swiss did one hell of a job.. I don't feel 'gay'.. I don't feel that my sexuality is wrong or any different though unlike NCBear and Swiss, I think that I kind of condemn those who dubbed themselves different because that's not who they are.. My sucking a cock and another man eating a pussy makes us any different exactly how? How are my feelings for a man or my erections for other men any different than that of a heterosexual man for a woman? I guess that other than society, I see no difference.

    If time stopped and reality became reality, people would still be people and children would still be children.. other than the purposes of reproduction, I feel no less of a man than any other man does or any less important than any other.. I hate the fact that my career deals with a bunch of pompous arrogant bastards that will get the female brainless cunt ahead of anybody else simply because she quickly spreaded her legs.. I never though it'd be that way though it is.. I work in the entertainment industry.. I'm more than well qualified to do tasks and complete certain projects though whoever is in charge, would much rather hire the chick with 36 d's simply because she's a chick and has 36 d's... If i walked around swinging around my 12 inch dick would that make me any different? Would that be permitted? How else would something like that be allowed...

    I'm slightly going off on a rant here and yes, im pissed. very pissed. men and women get tax benefits yet two men cannot.. women spread their legs and bear children it's as if everything is provided for them.. the world accomodates them and their lifestyle simply because they're women with kids.. Even then, they do through a shitty ass time and they solve it by having more kids..

    Before I go on, I would like to say that I do not mean to insult anybody... I'm not going to apologize to anybody and if you're offended by what I have to say, then blow me. Until I see a man flogging his cock on tv or on the big screen as often as I have to see a woman and her pair of tits flaunted in my face, then I don't want to hear it. I don't know what I'm experiencing at the moment I just know it's a hell of a lot of intense emotions and yeah, whatever, fine, i may be a little tipsy.. beautiful... you know what though? I'm a man who likes to drink and I bought this drink with my man money and what? are you gonna tell me now that my drink is gay? i payed taxes on this motherfucking bottle to help pay for your kids (cuz heaven knows i aint havin any) and still, I'm treated and classified as a second class citizen?

    Even then, a hell of a lot of 'you' have the audacity to dub my 'sexuality' as a mental illness and a sin? I'm not gonna go on.. I'm really super pissed and the more i continue, the more things I'm going to say and the more spiteful towards society I'll become and then I'll truly be a rebel without a cause.
     
  19. jonluke6ft2

    jonluke6ft2 New Member

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    OMG DUDE........You made me realize that I am pretty normal......Cause you are Messed up man.
     
  20. B_orleandersee

    B_orleandersee New Member

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    well, certainly I'm glad that I was able to help... still, blow me asshole.
     
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