I'm Lost in Life

[DaMoose]

So I graduate this year (I've just turned 18 recently), and I will be going to a community college (Valencia in Florida) for the first two years of my collegian years. I do not have any clue what I want to do with my life, I am completely lost. What should I do to try and figure out what I am "destined" to be? lol All help is appreciated!

MOOSE

 

[viking1]

I'm afraid I can't help you. I'm 45 and I still feel lost. When you figure it out please tell me how you did it.

 

[chicagosam]

Worry less about what you should do, and explore what you like. Learn everything and anything that you can. You will eventually find your way. As Viking implied, we all go through many profession changes in our lives as we grow. It keeps life interesting. Even those of us past 40 still will often wonder what we will do when we grow up. Enjoy your youth and explore all your options. You'll be fine.

Good luck in your college career and in your life, Moose. Sam

 

[IntoxicatingToxin]

I agree a bit with what chicagosam said.... Explore what you like. I believe that the best thing you can do for a living is something you thoroughly enjoy. So start there... think about what you love to do for fun, and see how you can do that for a living!

 

[earllogjam]

It's easy to get sucked up by society's view on what you should and shouldn't do - go to college, get married, have children, get a good job, be a good boy, do as I say, do what is respectable, don't be a bum,...etc. Just be aware of this. The world is open to you now think big about your life and where you want to go. It's scarry starting out but you will find people to help you on the way and people that share your intrests but you need to seek them out. Make as many friends as possible older and younger, men, women, kids. No one makes it on their own, reach out and ask what you can give of yourself what turns you on gets you excited. If you don't know you need to find out as quickly as you can by trying everthing out, asking around, go exploring. People who like what they do generally are better at it than those that hate what they do, obviously. You need to find out for yourself what is important to you and what isn't then everything will be clearer. Know that everbody older than you has gone though this rite of passage and still may be going through it. Kids are so sheltered these days from the "real" world that its out of the frying pan into the fire for most. Faith in yourself and the future, Clarity, and Courage were key for me. What ever you do just know that you are OK and we're all in the same boat Kid. Oh yeah floss and take care of your teeth you won't regret it. High Five. Go get em.

 

[surferboy]

dude, i hear ya. i'm coming to the closing of my freshman year of college (i'm going to BCC). i kept jumping between majoring in teaching english lit and minoring in journalism, to nursing. i've just decided to go into nursing. talk to the advisor at yer school.

 

[Knight Attrition]

I'm over at UCF, have been for 4 years. I do have a major but I just can't seem to find the motivation to finish it. I fear that by the time I'm happy with life and know what I want to do, I'll be 65 and will have wasted my life.

 

[transformer_99]

Pick something you think you'd want to do for the rest of your life that if you never got paid a dime for, you'd enjoy doing. That way you'd be happy and do the best you could to do the best job at whatever it is. Now that you've picked a profession or job to become an expert at, find out what it takes to become the expert, highest levels of education, what certifications and professional designations are required. This way the money should follow. The path to becoming that should not only be a challenge, but something you enjoy doing all along the way.

 

[B_big dirigible]

So I graduate this year (I've just turned 18 recently), and I will be going to a community college (Valencia in Florida) for the first two years of my collegian years. I do not have any clue what I want to do with my life, I am completely lost.

Normal. Fortunately you don't need a plan yet, and even if did have a plan, it would be premature.

Your first year or two should be exposure to things you never ran into when you were "down on the farm". Serious college-level courses in, oh, I don't know, anthropology, modern art, network theory, English literature, classical mechanics, system dynamics, organic chemistry, integral calculus, dynamical astronomy - some of these will be real eye-openers, things you never saw in high school. Any worthwhile college experience should be much like trying to get a drink from a fire hose.

After that your problem will be whittling down what you're going to study. There are far more interesting things than one can cram into a college career, or for that matter into a lifetime. But you have a couple of years before you have to worry about that.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

I am 19 and in school to be a social worker... and I don't even want to do that.... ideally I want to be a sex researcher.... but that isn't available to me here... so I'm going to get a masters in social work first...
Anyways sorry for rambling...
Is there a ugh... general course you can take to get your feet wet, and see what you might like?

 

[ceg1526]

Moose:

You're 18 and have the whole world in front of you. Explore, do good, be bad, build some memories, stretch, grow. Always ask yourself if, in the balance, your having fun - if you're not, change something. Don't let life pass you by because you can decide what to do.

Set some goals: Christmas in the southern hemisphere, a beer on Everest.

Pick something you enjoy for work. I've seen too many guys that get up in the morning to go to a job they absolutely hate. You'll probably have a dozen careers before you die (hopefully not before 2090), including some that don't exist today.

Oh, and don't take too much advice from old farts.

Take care

Ceg

 

[BigA]

I don't think you're too lost yet. Take them general courses. Then chose your major carefully. That's my advice. Oh yeah, and have fun... but not too much fun

 

[B_big dirigible]

Set some goals: Christmas in the southern hemisphere, a beer on Everest.

I was going to say something like "and don't waste your life on frivolous shit just to impress your lameass friends." Good thing I didn't.

If it's something you can do by buying an airplane ticket and renting a taxi at the other end, it's not much of a goal.

 

[Love-it]

You have time and you aren't being forced into making a decision tormorrow. Engage people in conversation about their life and experiences and ask them their opinion on their profession. Be open to opportunities and ideas. Don't let anyone dictate what you should or shouldn't do. There are hundreds of directions from working for and in the environmental fields all the way to high tech computers. What are your interests?

There are high pay jobs in the commercial and residential electric and plumbing trades. Air conditioning, HVAC, are wide open in Florida. Don't be afraid of dirt, sweat and 40-50 hour work weeks.

Go out and volunteer a day of your life in the fields you are interested in whether it is social work or building houses, live the life for a bit, it may take more than a day but so what? There is a lot of honor in an honest days work.

 

[ClaireTalon]

So I graduate this year (I've just turned 18 recently), and I will be going to a community college (Valencia in Florida) for the first two years of my collegian years. I do not have any clue what I want to do with my life, I am completely lost. What should I do to try and figure out what I am "destined" to be? lol All help is appreciated!

If you don't know it, why don't pick some subject you think you could like, and study as a ROTC fellowship? At least one question you can have answered then, the one what you shall do with your life. Although I think the answer will be less given by you than it will be given to you. I did it myself, but I don't regret it.

 

[dongalong]

If you have a passion in life, try to find a career based on that. Work won't seem like work.
For example: Since you are a member at LPSG, you are probably passionate about sex, there are so many possibilities in the sex industry.

 

[BigA]

I think your pretty much in control of your own "destiny". May be cliche, but I don't see much to suggest otherwise

 

[HotBulge]

Don't worry too much: very few people know what they really want to be in life (professionally and personally) at an early age. This includes those people who "know" with certainty that they were born to be surgeons or lawyers. (What 16 or 18 year old has surgical experience? so then how do they know with certainty??). Many people often go down these well-defined career paths simply because the outcome is certain. At the end of 7 or 8 years of study and training, they know that they will be doctors or lawyers. They then just grow into being a doctor or lawyer after more experience.

Envision it like this: (1) What educational goals do you have? by 18 to 20 years old, after two years of post-secondary education, one has a good intuition if you want schooling beyone a bachelor's degree (2) What working lifestyle do you wish to have: open-ended vs. 9 to 5 vs 60(+) hr work weeks if needed. (3) What personal/financial lifestyle do you want to maintain i.e. that you are willing to work (or not work) hard for: just able to get by for your needs, working-class, middle-class, professional class, wealthy. Be honest with yourself; most people who are honest with themselves gravitate to the areas that most reflect their personal values. What sacrifices (short/medium/long term) or pacts with the devil (don't sell your soul too much or you'll regret it) are you willing to make. So, if you say by age 35, I want to be making $80-$100K per year, you know that it will take a combination of advanced education, managerial experience, and a high degree of responsibility on the job to earn. You can be a doctor, lawyer, manager in multiple fields, financial planner, real estate agent, whatever to reach that financial objective - as long as you put in the work.

Above all, identify three subjects and activities that you enjoy doing. Imagine yourself being able to pursue these subjecsts/activities for at least 40 hours a week. (That includes subjects that you like to learn about in school. Being a full-time student is your job!) Are you willing to commit? If you are doing something that you don't like for more than 2 years, you should consider how to move on and make the necessary transition.


Warning: Some subjects are easier to pursue while you are younger because it becomes more difficult to do as you get old. It's not the numerical age that makes it difficult, but where you are in life. (A made-up example) A 35 year old woman could to go to medical school, but it constrains her decision to have children b/c of a biological clock. Without a lot of support, it would be very difficult to be in medical school, studying 60+ hrs/ week while being pregnant, and worrying about how to maintain a toddler while going on an internship or a clinical rotation.

A Surprise : Late adolescence (18-20) years old can be an angst-ridden mess, regardless of your background. I've had several friends (and myself included) become super-focused after the traditional college years and, as a result, returned to school between 24 and 29. They discovered that they think much better or more clearly when they're not wrestling with personal issues. (There is some research to support that cognitive growth still occurs well into the late 20s and early 30s). For example, I've had friends from high school (back in the '90s) say they can now understand advanced math whereas in high school, they had no clue

I could go on .... but I"ll rest for now.

 

[BigA]

ultimately, take life advice from someone other than me. I was just trying to illuminate what I have done wrong.

 

[hypolimnas]

I do not have any clue what I want to do with my life, I am completely lost. What should I do to try and figure out what I am "destined" to be? lol All help is appreciated!

The first rule is not to try to please other people. That route is doomed. Then, the only other rule is to experience as much of life as you can, different studies, travel, and work, meet lots of different people until you are about 28-29.

In your late twenties it is very common to have another period of feeling lost. Some of the possibilities you had when you were in your late teens will be be closed to you, and it is a bit depressing. This is very, very common, nothing to get bogged down in though. Other opportunities will start to open up to you in the next few years after that.

I strongly agree with some of the others here, avoid anything that ties you down too much until your late twenties, because for some reason, by the time we get to about thirty, things seem to come together. Often the path is clearer, and you are becoming more like the person that you really are. Also by this time you will have experienced enough of life to start to make some good decisions to set the course for the next phase of your life.

There is nothing wrong with feeling a bit lost, it is very normal. It comes with an immense, often intimidating amount of freedom. We all experience it. Enjoy life nevertheless, become your own best friend, and remember that your own sense of well being and happiness is the ultimate goal that can be achieved in many different ways.

Good luck.