I'm ready

B_Castello

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Yes Nicki8, I have start a new tread again lol

Since I came here, I feel change (a little bit) and more secure, and that makes me rather good, and it's because of the good comments and the good advise :smile:

So I make up my mine and I'm gonna talk to my best friend (you know the picture that I put of him and me in the water, he is the best looking guy in the all world) and I'm gonna tell him that I'm gay, but I will not tell him that I'm madly in love with him, that I will keep in my heart till I die.

So here is what I did today: I say (his name) I would like to talk to you this W-E about something important. He said what? I say, no I have to tell you in private. My mom is out of town, so lets go to her house and order some food and lets have some wine, then it will be easier for me to tell you. He says: what the fuck men, you worry me, are you OK, I say yes and I laugh.

So what I will do, I'm gonna get very drunk, or maybe not to to much and I will tell him that I like men, maybe more then woman (or maybe not, I'll see).

I'm soooooo soooooo nervous, but I want to feel free with at least one person that I know. :dance:
 

B_Think_Kink

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Alcohol helps, but that is sort of an immature way to let that out of the bag. But then again it will probably help in this situation.

Good luck and let us know how it goes. :)
 

canuck_pa

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Good luck Castello.

Coming out can be difficult but I'm sure you'll feel much better once you do. But I strongly suggest you don't get drunk. If you're sober you will be able to control the situation better and you'll be less likely to say something you would prefer not saying.
 

B_Castello

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It's gonna be the hardest thing that I never say in my all life, a little alcool will help lol

And I will tell you everything :)
 

nudeyorker

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Good luck with your friend... A word of advice? Don't use liquor as a crutch for difficult situations; you will feel better in long run. There are many difficult situations that we have to deal with in life and from my own experience it is much better to do it with a clear head.
 

larocca

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If you really think you're ready, then you should tell him. Doing is this way just makes it easier. I might use that technique one day far in the future.
 

B_Nick8

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You're going to get similar advice from all of us. This is an extremely important conversation and one that will ultimately be liberating for you almost regardless of the outcome but you need to be able to express yourself honestly and clearly.

There is almost no "wrong" thing you can say but part of your job in this situation is to be as sensitive to his feelings and reactions as you will hope he is to yours and you need to be able to be fully present to do that.

You are being very courageous and are taking a big step in your own evolution as a man. I hope you get everything you wish from this and know you'll be getting more than you realize.
 

B_Castello

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Yes I'm ready, to him only. Thanks guys and girls ;)

But last year my parents almost fund out... I was at this guy, his father work with my father, he is not a friend really, anyway, I was at his house in the pool and nobody was there, except us. Then we start kissing (I knew he was gay) and his mom arrived HIIIIII, she said: You better go to your home and I'm gonna call your father. I wanted to kill her. So when I arrived home my father say: Mrs XXX call me, I said yeahhh we were just kiding on a bet. So he said, dont do that at peoples house and have respect, and I'm gonna call your mom and she'll talk to you. But I never heard about it, so I guess they beleive my storie lol + sometimes I bring home some girl (but very rarely).

But I dont think I want to be with a guy for the rest of my life. The only exception will be my friend, and that is NEVER gonna happen anyway.
 

DiscoBoy

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Good luck! Remember, if he cares enough about you, he'll accept you. If not, then he wasn't worth your time to begin with.
 

B_Castello

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The day... tonight is the night, and I'm not nervous AT ALL, or maybe just a little bit. He just call me and say, so we still have a date tonight lol

I tell you all about it tomorrow :)
 

B_Castello

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I had a very good night, and everything went great.

He came over, I open a bottle a wine, we stard talking, then he told me (not long after opening the wine) what did you want to tell me. I said, I dont know, I have to drink a little more. He say why, I say, I just have to cause it's a bit hard. So he say, Are you gay? I did'nt answer, so he say tell me, are you, I say yes, my all body was sweating I think. He said, I kind of knew that what you want to tell me, and I thought of that before.

So he said, I dont care it doesn't make any difference with me. I said but dont tell anyone, he said of course not. Then he said is there something else you wanna tell me. I said no, he said are you sure? I said, of course I'm sure. He ask me if I had someone in my life, i said no (and it's true).

So we drank, order pizza, and bla bla bla, and he keep ask if I had another thing to tell him, it's not like I had kill someone on top of that and was confessing! And he ask me if I had the hot for him, I said, NO (fuch yeah) he said why, I'm to ugly for you lol I said no, he is my friend and not my type anyway (fucking lie). So he ask me what was my type, hairy I said (he has no hair, but I don't care). He also said he wasn't gay, I say I know that and I respect that. But he said if he had to do it, it would be with me (I think I came in my pants in that moment). I laugh and I said not a chance buddy (what a lier I am, but I listen to your advise and I respect him).

So we went out after and had a good time.

After, we took a taxi to go back home, and he hold my hand in the taxi and said, I'm happy you told me, you can always trust me and it will make us closure. So the taxi stop me at my house, he said, I had forget my cap at your house (it was true) so he told the taxi to wait. We went in the house, so he took his cap and THEN, he kiss me on the lips (for the 3 longest seconds of my life) and said, sorry I just want it to see... so I say: and? he said I dont know, so I said OK, he said I'm not gay, I say I knew that it wasn't a big deal. And he said good bye and left.

This morning I woke up, he whote me a message, saying that he was sorry for last night he was drunk. And ask me what I was doing... anyway everything is the same between us, I think even better and I always gonna respect him and keep my mouth shout and will never tell him my affection. He is my bestfriend, but I will always love him in my hart, more then I will never love anyone else.

Tad tam, So Nicki, am I a full growing men now? lol
 
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wallaboi

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Congratulations Castello. Understand, that it is possible to have wonderful relationships with straight male friends. Like you, I fell in love with my best friend from school many years ago. I think he knew I was gay before I did, or at least before I came to terms with my sexuality.

He is now married with children and his wife is also one of my best friends. One night when I was drunk, I spilled my guts, and told her how much I loved her husband (I have never told him). All she said was, "how could you not love such a beautiful man?" and gave me kiss and a hug. A confident and beautiful person herself!
 

B_Castello

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Thank you Nickki ;)

Walaboi, I only have straight friends. But it would be cool to have a gay one, just to exchange. And I think that the wife of you friend told her husband.

Yesterday we spend the day together, he ask me couple thinks about been gay, but not too much. And everything is the same as before, nothing change between us.