Immersing Myself Into The Community

User50986

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Hi all,

I've never been someone that's had a ton of gay friends. I don't particularly participate in the "gay scene", I barely drink and don't like loud, crowded bars/clubs. I'm not promiscuous either. However, I would love to meet more gay men and become a bigger part of the community. Do you think it's easy to do with all of the typical "gay" things that I'm not interested in? 31, Philly area. Also a fan of the bear community.. possibly a member?
 

briacon429

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Hi all,

I've never been someone that's had a ton of gay friends. I don't particularly participate in the "gay scene", I barely drink and don't like loud, crowded bars/clubs. I'm not promiscuous either. However, I would love to meet more gay men and become a bigger part of the community. Do you think it's easy to do with all of the typical "gay" things that I'm not interested in? 31, Philly area. Also a fan of the bear community.. possibly a member?

Short answer is yes! I’m nowhere near Philly, so I can’t speak to the scene where you are. But it’s very possible for you to get into get involved in the community. It all depends on what you’re interested in!

Is there anything in particular you’re into? (The bear community is great, though the way you framed the question, it’s just the tip of the iceberg!)
 

User50986

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Short answer is yes! I’m nowhere near Philly, so I can’t speak to the scene where you are. But it’s very possible for you to get into get involved in the community. It all depends on what you’re interested in!

Is there anything in particular you’re into? (The bear community is great, though the way you framed the question, it’s just the tip of the iceberg!)
Hey, thanks for the response. I'm interested in lots of things! I'm a roller coaster lover, I'm a big fan of movies and TV shows, and I'm even a transit/urban planning nerd. How's Cali? I used to live in LA.
 

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I'm also not in the Philly area, but as someone who stopped drinking a long time ago and who never liked going to clubs, I relate to your question.

I'm a big fan of the MeetUp app. You can search under ""LGBTQ" or under whatever interests you have. The hiking group that I found in my area has hundreds of interesting smart guys and for many of them drinking/dancing are far down their lists of activities.
 

User50986

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I'm also not in the Philly area, but as someone who stopped drinking a long time ago and who never liked going to clubs, I relate to your question.

I'm a big fan of the MeetUp app. You can search under ""LGBTQ" or under whatever interests you have. The hiking group that I found in my area has hundreds of interesting smart guys and for many of them drinking/dancing are far down their lists of activities.
Such a good idea! I've used MeetUp in the past and it's great. It was especially helpful when I moved to LA to make some new friends. Good thinking and thank you!
 

briacon429

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Such a good idea! I've used MeetUp in the past and it's great. It was especially helpful when I moved to LA to make some new friends. Good thinking and thank you!
Since you mentioned roller movies, TV shows, and transit, you can always get involved in those communities too! Philly isn’t LA of course, but I’m sure they have something akin to the Cinematheque, maybe on a smaller scale? I do know transit has a community of its own, seeing as how you’re right on the Northeast Corridor….
 

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Hi coaster freak,

You already the biggest part of the gay community by being a member. There are many gay men who feel the way you do, "don't like to participate in certain events." The bear community is wonderful and they have a lot of events that you could participate in. Growlr is a good app that more so caters to the bear community. Also there are a lot of local reoccurring bear events in almost ever major city. It will not be hard for you to find ways to immerse yourself in the fashion that makes you happy. I also am not promiscuous, don't go to gay bars and all that you elude to. I know it's overwhelming at first but don't be afraid to do something out of your comfort zone. I often found that when I pushed myself to go to Touche an awesome gay bar in Chicago, or steamworks (a bathhouse) I had an amazing time and meant so many amazing men and people and yeah I played. Looking back I don't regret it but you will regret what you do not do.
 
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tito21

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Short answer is yes! I’m nowhere near Philly, so I can’t speak to the scene where you are. But it’s very possible for you to get into get involved in the community. It all depends on what you’re interested in!

Is there anything in particular you’re into? (The bear community is great, though the way you framed the question, it’s just the tip of the iceberg!)

I don’t think OP is looking for just the tip from a bear. He wants the whole length.
 
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headbang8

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Gay Bear Coaster Lovers' MeetUp Group? Sounds awesome!

BTW, I have a coaster maker as a potential client, and apparently introverts like coasters more than extroverts. Why do you think that's so?
 

chrisrobin

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Hi all,

I've never been someone that's had a ton of gay friends. I don't particularly participate in the "gay scene", I barely drink and don't like loud, crowded bars/clubs. I'm not promiscuous either. However, I would love to meet more gay men and become a bigger part of the community. Do you think it's easy to do with all of the typical "gay" things that I'm not interested in? 31, Philly area. Also a fan of the bear community.. possibly a member?
Mate, you are not alone, many members of the gay community don't want to mix in the bars and clubs and bath houses etc.
And its possible to go through life without doing any of those things (to excess) and still lead a happy healthy gay existence.
 

User50986

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Gay Bear Coaster Lovers' MeetUp Group? Sounds awesome!

BTW, I have a coaster maker as a potential client, and apparently introverts like coasters more than extroverts. Why do you think that's so?
Haha would you join my Gay Bear Coaster Lovers' MeetUp?

Not sure why. Maybe because our love of coasters makes us "different"?