Implied Male Superiority?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by D_Rosalind Mussell, Jul 24, 2010.

  1. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

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    Just an observation here, so please don't flame me to the wall. There seems to be an undercurrent that (because this is a "porn" site) we should expect and accept that misogyny and discrimination in general will happen. While I don't agree with this, what do you think? Does the focus of this site subconsciously imply that male perspectives are granted more credibility and, therefore, superiority on lpsg? And if so, should we just expect and accept this as the status quo?
     
  2. cherychoper

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    No, I don't feel that is implied at all. Just my point of view. This site is for men who think they have large penises, and the men or women who like looking at or discussing said implement. Beyond that I see no implication.
    Having a large penis does not make it's owner superior, either to males or females. But can be considered a subject of conversation or questioning.
     
  3. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Actually I've seen lots and lots of (normally male) members post shoulder shrugging posts about how the female members should expect and tolerate rampant sexism and misogyny on LPSG, using a variety of rationalisations of varying degrees of spuriousness. Some use arguments about freedom of speech to justify letting misogyny go unchallenged, others claim the misogyny on LPSG is no more prevalent than in RL and it's just representative of a certain constituency of male opinion and that challenging it is pointless. Some seem to think that LPSG should act like some kind of Male/Female encounter group where misogynists can be re-educated by the the female members as though the female members where like a living bank of agony aunts/sex therapists to whom all the little pathetic sexists should come for a peek at the female side of life.

    What I see a whole lot less of from male members is posts which directly and unequivocally challenge other male member's misogyny and sexism. I see a lot of excuse making and a lot of appeals for patience and I even see accusations of PC overreaction to misogyny. I'm pretty fed up of it actually. I can fully understand why members like Dolfette just had enough and fucked off.
     
  4. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

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    I actually understand why Dolfette left, too. I haven't been a member of this site for too long, but I've read a LOT of threads and ended up joining because of strong female perspectives like Dolfette's and MR's. I see a lot of male members here seek such perspectives on lpsg, so I think a continued exodus of other female members will hurt the overall quality of this community.
     
  5. cherychoper

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    I couldn't agree with you more.
    Although I joined to post photos of myself, a thing many men seem to enjoy, I have found the discussions started by many of the women here to be very instructive.
    I guess I am also at fault for not bashing any misogynist language or comments. But my excuse would be my not taking the time to argue with the fools. The same would go for racist, or other offensive writings.

    Please, Ladies, try to ignore the fools and continue your insightful comments.
     
  6. Endued

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    I'm not seeing any undercurrent myself, to be honest. All I've seen is a lot of ignorant people spouting a lot of offensive rubbish, and they tend to nail their flags to the mast pretty clearly so I'm not seeing it I'm afraid.

    As for the reason why there is a lot of offensive rubbish posted here, I don't think it has anything to do with the focus of the site per se, rather the crowd it attracts, in the sense that straight men (undoubtedly the group where misogyny is most common) are more prevalent here than outside the forum. Therefore you're undoubtedly going to see more people talking shite here than in most other groups you could find. Sadly, by extension, this also means that there are fewer people to point out to the shite-talkers that they are talking shite, and it can seem as though there are none at times. But to me it's a case of an abnormally high number of bad apples rather than any inherent trait of the people who come to this site as a whole, or any adopted culture or custom.

    As for expectations and views on acceptance, I don't see why anyone's would differ on LPSG compared to among the population as a whole. There are God-knows how many idiots on this planet and some will offend you at some point, and with a forum this size you're undoubtedly going to run into some here too.

    But there is another meaning of acceptance, about how you choose to take someone's vews or behaviour. You have every right not to accept one person's idiocy and you can tell them/ignore them/attempt to educate them/whatever. However, that has nothing to do with the forum on which you are interacting.
     
    #6 Endued, Jul 24, 2010
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2010
  7. petite

    petite New Member

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    It's posts like these that continue to make you one of my favorite LPSG-ers of all time.

    Thank you for taking the time to verbalize these thoughts so well.
     
  8. HiddenLacey

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    I agree with you Petite! Hilaire is such a great guy!

    Sadly I have just ignored most of it. Maybe I'm contributing rather than helping by being silent. It is in my nature to be silent until I'm angry or my feelings are hurt.
     
  9. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Ah that's a really nice thing to say, thank you Petite. :wink:

    I just wish it were a heterosexual guy you could pay that compliment to, I mean they're the ones who're supposed to love and desire women. If only the love and desire came with respect and a healthy attitude more frequently.
     
    #9 D_Tim McGnaw, Jul 24, 2010
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2010
  10. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Ah you're too sweet, both for the compliments, and because you don't get in to all the harsher cut and thrust around here. Some people are good at aggro, some are good at being kind and friendly :wink:

    It's people like you and Petite that make this place worth logging on to regularly.
     
  11. cherychoper

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    Ok, so now you have really made me feel guilty. I guess my silence is not acceptable. In stead of just moving on I should express my disgust.

    I apologize, ladies, and will be more vigilant and proactive.
     
  12. D_Sparroe Spongecaques

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    If staying silent is your thing then carry on doing so.I'm usually very vocal if somebody irks me,usually it makes things worse.....so this time i stayed quiet.....and surprise surprise,world war 3 is almost happening,along with crocodile tears (not mine i might add!)

    Stay true to yourself and bubbles to what anyone else thinks.
     
  13. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    :wink: Hey don't feel guilty, feel righteous and justified :biggrin1:
     
  14. AlteredEgo

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    I can add nothing to this. As you often do, hilaire, you have posted perfection. Thank you.
     
  15. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    I don't bash them either, even when they royally deserve it, mostly because I couldn't be bothered having the argument. I find arguments of that kind frustrating, annoying and upsetting, and I hate feeling angry so I'd rather just avoid it. I've always been thankful for those strong women (and men!) who WILL argue about it. I've always felt they were fighting for me too.
     
    #15 B_subgirrl, Jul 25, 2010
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2010
  16. MercyfulFate

    MercyfulFate New Member

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    Where is all this misogyny going on exactly?
     
  17. WriterGirl

    WriterGirl New Member

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    Well said. The fact you consistently understand gives me hope. :wink:

    Unnfortunately, there are those who rationalize misogynistic comments. I find it interesting that some would actually expect nothing less from heterosexual males - and more interesting that people reading that would not disagree, especially the men themselves. It is an excellent point that women who love men should be with men who care for, love and respect women in general. It is occasionally difficult to be a woman in this forum, where many of the men do not speak out against some of the anti-female posts that are made. Some of the women who post on the site can be feisty - they need to be in this type of atmosphere.

    Someone mentioned that because misogyny happens in RL, it should be expected in the boards. I find that to be poor logic - it simply doesn't make it right. As others have pointed out, if other hate type comments (substitute racist or homophobic for misogynistic) were made, reactions are much more harsh and would come from more readers. If the bar is set that low on standards of conduct in the message boards, then hateful commentary will continue.

    Finally there are those who don't see any misogynistic comments or attitudes on the boards at all - even in their own writings. People like Dolfette are great because they would actually counter in a direct way. They share their thoughts freely and generously. I tend to respond only to posts that interest me. I will be the first to admit that unless a post spewing misogynistic/hateful/ignorant comments irritates me enough to respond, my personal thought is that a person who is so wilfully ignorant is not one who would ever pay attention to what I write.

    So I can see why some women find the atmosphere difficult to tolerate at times to the point where they have to take breaks or leave the community. The bottom line that the men (majority of the members) need to decide : is there a real desire for diversity including women. And if the answer is yes, then what is the majority willing to do to create an atmosphere where diversity including women is encouraged.
     
  18. thetramp

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    A very good post WriterGirl, in a thread that i find very interesting and important in general, because it points out the responsibility each of us members has to make this community a place where diversity can be lived.

    The misogyny happens in real live does not mean we are meant to just accept it.
    Yes it is true, women are still not of equal rights in many parts of the civilized world where men call women liberated. Still women earn less pay for the same job, still in many areas it is harder to get a divorce for the women than for the man, still in many areas the career opportunities are not equal and still boys and girl get brought up with antiquated ideas of what roles they have to play.
    But that all is no reason not to stand up for change.
    I do disagree with WriterGirl tho that the logic that if it happens in real live it also has to be expected here is poor logic. I consider it a valid point, but i agree with her that that does not make it right and does not mean it should be accepted on here.

    I have a strong desire for diversity including women as WriterGirl phrases it, and i am willing to stand up for it. And if everybody who does feel the same way would do that within their means we would change the community to a more tolerant place.
    I will sum my point up with the words of Karl Popper:
    We should therefore claim, in the name of tolerance, the right not to tolerate the intolerant
     
  19. EllieP

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Well, I'm one of the silent ones, too, but it's only because I don't give any of the idiots credence with a response. In my opinion, they are probably underage boys (physically and undeniably mentally) hiding behind a handle and the anonymity of the Internet. My only solace is the fact that these boys will probably never have an opportunity to reproduce in real life although they've mated many times in their mind. That's probably why they're fucked up in the head.
     
  20. double_digit

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    It puzzles me in troubling ways that threads and discussions like this are still occurring here...

    For me it is really, really simplistic and it works In Real Life(tm) as in the Internet:

    The Golden Rule.

    And if you're really feeling that perturbed over anything in particular - especially if it is anything that I may have said out of hand or color - IM me. LET ME KNOW...

    I like to fix problems. :D I am fast to apologize too for genuine mistakes. I made them so I own them. ;> Hopefully better for the experience.

    But honestly? It's fun sometimes to sit back and just watch the knuckledraggers duke it out, especially when it turns into infighting amongst themselves. :D :popcorn:
     
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