In love with what i can't have...

[mymilkshakez]

Man i feel like such a loser. I am in love with one of my teachers, who is a guy and I cant get him out of my head. Every day I wonder if I see him around, and just have nice bonding time.. I have never felt this way before, it's weird.. But their is a challenge, he is about 30+ years older then me, has 3 children, and a wife. I hate this feeling, its never the same with admiring superstars because you know you can't have them, but I actually know this person and do all i can to impress, but he shows no interest in my intentions, it hurts..

any common experiences?

 

[invisibleman]

Yeah. If the guy is married with kids...you definately don't have permission to fall in love with him.

It hurts. But it will hurt more, if you cause them to divorce. She can sue your ass for damages for fucking up her marriage.

 

[goodwood]

gosh - sorry to hear this.
it sounds like you are very focused on this guy.
nothing good can come of your attention towards him.
a suggestion - try to focus your attention on other interests
or pursuits. it can't happen with him and the sooner you come to
terms with that, the better off you'll be. good luck.

 

[B_625girth]

me too! she is 30 yrs younger than me. she is easy to talk to, very mild mannered, and doesn't go thru a lot of mood swings like a lot of gals. we are friends, but she has sensed that I want more. I am in good shape for my age. she has even commented that when she hugs me, there's no fat roll. unfortunately, not too many hugs are given, she does tell me she loves me, but that is in a friend way, or possibly she sees me as a father figure. her parents are divorced, and have been for quite awhile it seems.

i have accepted the fact that what we have going now is all that it will ever be. I don't accept it very well, and sometimes now I avoid seeing her or don't hang around for very long. it sux, but I can't beat father time.

 

[D_ZeThonginator]

Well women all have those private thoughts. I hope you find a man down the road that brings those out of you and isn't afraid of it. Nothing you feel is wrong, as long as you never put him in a situation where he is aware he has a choice. In fact you have good taste, sounds like a charmer... go find more, and let the current one be your private fantasy.

 

[lopo2000]

Well, you can't control what you feel, we all will in some point of life, fall in love with the wrong person. So, there's nothing wrong with that. But, you can always control how you act. If you treat the feeling as your experience in liking a wrong person, then you'll learn how to deal with it in the future. Treat it as a learning experience. It hurts, I know, been there done that, but this kind of hurt will make you stronger...believe me...

 

[lopo2000]

And, I forgot to add, don't pursue it...

 

[helgaleena]

This is what is called a Crush. or Love Unrequited. It is party of learning how to love, how to feel for another human being deeply. And it has happened to me countless times.

Dealing with one's own feelings are like dealing with raw bread dough.

 

[sexplease]

No one know where Cupids arrow will strike ... or where it won't.
alas, such is life.

 

[earllogjam]

I wouldn't say you're in love because love is a two way street and you really need to know the person to be in "love". You're deeply infatuated.

Regardless it hurts. I think everyone's been in your shoes here.

No way out of it I'm afraid. Time or untill another distraction or infatuation comes along to take your mind away.

 

[D_Anton_Pavlovich_Jerkhov]

Man i feel like such a loser. I am in love with one of my teachers, who is a guy and I cant get him out of my head. Every day I wonder if I see him around, and just have nice bonding time.. I have never felt this way before, it's weird.. But their is a challenge, he is about 30+ years older then me, has 3 children, and a wife. I hate this feeling, its never the same with admiring superstars because you know you can't have them, but I actually know this person and do all i can to impress, but he shows no interest in my intentions, it hurts..

any common experiences?

Oh, yes, all of us have been there before, and it doesn't happen only to the young.

You may say this is amoral, but the fact that he is married and much older than you wouldn't be a hitch or a hindrance, as long as he wanted you, too, right or wrong, because as I seem to gather, this is lust rather than love, and plainly said, you basically want to make out or have sex with him.

I'm just curious to know what you are doing to impress him. Be careful, if he is not the closet, he may read this as harrasment and you can be in trouble.

If you have given him plenty of signals and he hasn't responded, you'd be better to back off. Deal with your feelings for him while you masturbate.This may bring you some relief, and time will also help you.

 

[LGX]

Yeah, it sucks. There are so many times I'd wanted to fuck someone, but there is one huge factor in the way. I think its because we KNOW we can't get with the person. Typical human behavior.

 

[lopo2000]

Oh, yes, all of us have been there before, and it doesn't happen only to the young.

I really like this piece of reminder... I always thought having a crush should be only for teenagers and young adult... But now I'm 24 and still having crushes...

 

[need2bsexy2]

MRS. MUSSLEMAN

That really is her name and she was my English teacher in Middle School. She was georgeous and wore mini skirts. I was 13. She would sit on the front of her desk, towards the class, and lean back...I was in heaven. Those were the most beautiful legs and stocking tops and garter belts I have seen.

 

[Darkriff]

Cute crush, but I wouldn't act on it, if he's already married and settled then you have nothing to gain from trying to reverse that, if you even could. Move on, it'll get easier with time.

 

[B_625girth]

follow up from post #4....she emails me early Sat morning, 3 am, to tell me basically that she and her bf did not hit it off. they never do it seems. and she wonders how my nite went, what did I do, and if I had any drama. of course, at 3 am I sleeping, so I reading this about 8:30 the next morning. and I am thinking, man, if I was 20 yrs younger I would be loving & nailing this chick daily. and how big of douche bag this supposed bf of hers must be. I don't understand why she doesn't drop him, they go thru shit like this everyday. she digs him, but him not so much on her. I know who he is and think she could do a LOT better. of course, at least til now, I haven't said that. But one day soom, out of frustration, I'll just blurt it out.

 

[helgaleena]

Blurt out! Please! :lmao:

I am laughing because wouldn't a 'father figure' be expected to give such advice anyway?

An old flame had a younger gal who came to him to talk about her love life all the time, until she once said she felt protected with him and he said, yeah, but who will protect you from ME? He said her eyes got very big indeed. She saw him with new eyes and they tried it out. Not that it lasted.

 

[B_thickjohnny]

I really like this piece of reminder... I always thought having a crush should be only for teenagers and young adult... But now I'm 24 and still having crushes...

I'm 53 and still have crushes!

 

[B_625girth]

crushes??? man, i get infatuated, seriously lustful.

 

[invisibleman]

Yeah. If the guy is married with kids...you definately don't have permission to fall in love with him.

It hurts. But it will hurt more, if you cause them to divorce. She can sue your ass for damages for fucking up her marriage.

See?!! This is what I am talking about.

Source: The price of an affair? $9 million : News-Record.com : Greensboro & the Triad's most trusted source for local news and analysis