So I was in a Yahoo chat room one night just to get my rocks off I guess, and I had a nice talk with a guy who lived in CA and told me a site called adam4adam.com, so I joined it...made a profile, I got a lot of responses mainly from people looking for NSA sex, which I wasn't interested in. Ever since I broke up with my exgf I knew I wanted my next relationship to be with a guy. It's been almost a year so I was waiting for the right person, not rushing to find anyone. So I met this really cute korean guy, he's only been in this country 9 months and only speaking english for about a year, but he speaks it well enough. He's extremely nice, generous, gentle, etc. The interesting thing is he has only had one boyfriend himself, and was cheated on also like my exgf did to me, so I guess we have an understanding of the pain associated with that. After a lot of talks we also both like sex but realize it isn't the most important thing in a relationship, neither of us was looking for a fuck buddy. So anyway, I've fooled around with only one guy in my life, and it never went past oral. I know I saw the posts somewhere about the proper way to uh...clean yourself, down below. I tried searching but failed (Sad for an ex-mod, I know). Also from the things I read, properly preparing for anal involves watching what you eat the day before or so? So how does a couple spontaneously have sex? Lastly, my boyfriend of about 5 days now has pretty much taken the lead on everything since I guess he knows I'm nervous and unexperienced when it comes to guys. He's the one who asked me out, he kissed me first knowing I was nervous, etc. I kind of wanted to surprise him taking the initiative sexually, but what should I do and when? I personally hated my exgf because I had to take the lead on everything, but I don't want to do anything too soon.