Ummm...with all due respect Bb i don't think he was doing that at all. He was expressing what he wanted and wanted to know if that was not the norm for gay society. Just becuase his desires and ideals for a first date do not correspond with yours does not inherently mean he is "slut shaming." What would be the phrase for someone calling a person out for not wantng to be slutty? Live and let live.
It's ike getting pissed at someone who asks "Is everyone into some kind of kink, cuz i like pure vanilla, and was wondering if I was in the minority for the gay culture." While not for me (i have to have some kink) I wouldn't dream of accusing them of ..."kink shaming", I guess? Any more than I would feel the desire to critisize a person for an unshared kink. I don't get sounding, but I am not going to try to "shame" a person who does. If it gets them off, great. I expect them to respect me and my desire to not have it performed on me. If they tried to shame me for not trying it or being closed minded to it, there is the fuckin door.
Thank you very much for the defense, as you were absolutely right that I was not "slut shaming" anyone.:smile:
This whole topic came to my mind because of this one little incident that happened.
OKay so this guy emails me online. And he was really cute and adorable. I dont know about some of you, but when I start to communicate with a guy I like, my mind starts playing all these games and visuals. So anyway, we exchanged numbers, and we had a date planned. We were gonna hang out and actually go on a date. Like a real date, where I pick him up and then we go out to eat and have a few drinks. So Im like YeS!
Anyway, a few days pass and I hear nothing from him, but I still try to maintain some form of communication by sending a couple of texts. Well the day comes, and he totally bails out on me. Which is fine, if you dont want to hang out, cool, onto the next.
So I get him out of my system, but then lo and behold, after a couple of weeks, he says Hi. But all he wants to do is fuck. I guess he was so horny that night. And I said no i cant today.
But the thing that bothered me was the fact that what would've happened if i did say yes to the sex? Clearly, there was an attraction. Did I actually lose the chance to actually get to know this guy? Thats pretty much where all of this is coming from.