Is it ethical to start seeing my FwB's friend?

[eyescream]

I briefly spoke to him about it this evening, I asked him "do you think it would be your business if I started seeing one of your friends?" and he said "no, I don't think it would be my business".

So I've officially got the go ahead! I am glad. I think it's hot to actually get to do a hot guy and his friend. Although today I also asked him his take on 3somes (2 guys 1 girl) and he was like NO WAY I'M HOMOPHOBIC so that part kind of sucks.

 

[Chase1600]

Good for you. It is not necessary for him to know which friend. If it suits, keep us posted as to how well the FWB relationship continues.

BTW, he can call himself homophobic if he wishes, and maybe he is, but as a gay man I don't think not wanting to have sex with another man - not even in a 3 way with a woman - makes him homophobic.

 

[Principessa]

I briefly spoke to him about it this evening,

I asked him "do you think it would be your business if I started seeing one of your friends?" and he said "no, I don't think it would be my business".

But you didn't tell him which friend. Hmm, I dunno. I still say this has disaster written all over it.


So I've officially got the go ahead! I am glad. I think it's hot to actually get to do a hot guy and his friend. [QUOTE]Although today I also asked him his take on 3somes (2 guys 1 girl) and he was like NO WAY I'M HOMOPHOBIC so that part kind of sucks.

You think your soon to be bf is gonna be okay with you fucking his friend? Do you seriously think they won't be talking about you and comparing notes?

 

[Chase1600]

[/B] You think your soon to be bf is gonna be okay with you fucking his friend? Do you seriously think they won't be talking about you and comparing notes? [/SIZE][/FONT]

Principessa, this wasn't the issue she raised. While we both questioned her reference to ethics, she was asking if it was fair to the FWB to have sex with his friend without telling him. When she told him she was thinking of having sex with one of his friends, would he mind, and he said no, he opted to not ask which friend.

Maybe they do know. Maybe the friend asked him about her. Maybe lots of things. One thing that is no longer maybe, is not knowing how he would feel if he were to discover it and she had said nothing.

 

[eyescream]

BTW, he can call himself homophobic if he wishes, and maybe he is, but as a gay man I don't think not wanting to have sex with another man - not even in a 3 way with a woman - makes him homophobic.

I completely agree.

Maybe I should get him drunk and then ask him again.:biggrin1: I think this whole homophobia thingy is just ridiculous but oh well.

My whole life I've only asked 2 guys if they'd be up for a 2-guys-1-girl 3some and they've both linked it with being a gay thing. Can't win them all.

[/B] You think your soon to be bf is gonna be okay with you fucking his friend? Do you seriously think they won't be talking about you and comparing notes? [/SIZE][/FONT]

You mean my soon to be FB (Mr.Y)? Yeah, that's what I'm worrying about now. He had a thing for me a few years back and told everyone including my current FwB (Mr. X) about it. So he might be a little bummed out about that.

It's a complicated situation because me and Mr.Y don't have as many mutual friends as Mr.X and I.

So when I asked Mr.X "do you mind if I do one of your friends?" he won't know exactly who it is because we share a lot of friends.

Mr.Y on the other hand, we only have one main mutual friend which is my current FwB. So in this case I do want to keep it a secret for anonymity's sake.

FWIW: FwB and ethics do not belong in the same sentence. :no:

I think it depends on how you look at it.

Some guys would only be a girl's boyfriend just to have sex with her and after they get what they want they leave. Some people marry for money. Some women try to get "accidentally pregnant" to get the guy to propose. There are a lot of unethical situations in life that seem ethical on the surface.

I have friends who have been my friends for years, and we just so happen to have sex once in a while. I see that as something honest and mutually beneficial.

I try hard not to hurt anyone's feelings in the way I live my life, I think that's a good start.

But I definitely will spend some time considering what you've said, I guess I never really thought of the FwB thing being unethical.