Is It Ok Not To Have Passion but A Great Relationship

[AtiaoftheJulii]

There are some really great answers here. Thank you all for taking the time to answer. Im going to try a couple of suggstions here. I have cheated twice due to lack of passion and chemistry, Im trying to avoid doing it again....

 

[deleted395785]

wow this post is hitting close to home. going thru a similar situation w/ my on & off gf. we laugh alot, but life is more than laughter. cant say i cheated on her cuz of our lack of sex chemistry, but i thought about it. EVERY SINGLE DAY. we're getting along better but she can seriously have sex every 2-3 months while i need it 2 times a day. my suggestion is to 1st communicate. then see what else is out there. if he's the one you can pick up where you left off hopefully. good luck

 

[Beachboy19]

I have a great relationship with this guy but there is no passion. My last boyfriend and I had great sexual chemistry and a good friendship. However should I let go of a person who is suited to me in every way except sexually?


*sigh*


P.S. Ex returned to Cyprus after he completed his education.

P.S.S. We have a lot in common and laugh a lot.

Its up to you, I guess the ideal would be "consummate love"

PS: I loved Atia of the Julii :tongue:

 

[Beachboy19]

My experience is that passion can last for decades, so it's not based on novelty and newness. My experience is that if you search for long enough, you can find the person who is your best friend, your soulmate and who is your sexual ideal. I would never settle for less, especially after my experience of decades of joy and passion.

How did you 2 meet?

 

[Beachboy19]

Studies suggest that passion is based on novelty and newness. That is not going to continue to always be possible in a committed relationship. Being great friends is better in my book if you have to choose. But great sex and great friendship are both desirable. Think of all the people who are in long term relationships that you know. What percentage actually have both? I'd say it's like one in ten are still crazy for each other.

No, our psych teacher said while consummate love is rare after a long time, it still exists. I'm too lazy to dig up actual sources tho.

 

[B_FruitFly]

You will eventually start hating him.

 

[deleted356736]

How did you 2 meet?

A blind date, she was on holidays from Africa and someone thought we would get on well together. It was love at first sight, and everyone I know who has experienced instant love has had a long-lasting and passionate relationship.

 

[dolfette]

it would be ok for me to have that kind of relationship, because sex isn't so important to me.
but if sex is so important that you're going to cheat to get some, it's obviously not ok for you.

and that's ok.

everyone has different needs that they need filled in order to be happy.
good sex is one of yours. that's who you are, so learn to love it.

 

[B_duanculo]

Sooner or later, the novelty of this "great" relationship will wear off. And if you are having these doubts / concerns now then what makes you think things are going to get better in one, two or three years? Or if you get married he'll become some sexual animal (most studies seem to say marriage does the opposite)?

You should politely leave him and find someone out there who dicks...I mean ticks all your boxes :wink:

I have had all shades of sexual and emotional compatibility, I am still looking for the woman who will love me and love to fuck me but its early days yet. Unless you are pushing 60 then there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Even some with bigger...gills

very peculiar response since she NEVER mentioned anything to do with him being bad in bed or lacking size. you right off the bat assume these things because apparently a big cock can never go wrong right? :bsflag:

 

[B_Nia88]

Sounds like you have a great friendship not a romantic relationship so I say let him go.

 

[MalakingTiti]

I have a great relationship with this guy but there is no passion. My last boyfriend and I had great sexual chemistry and a good friendship. However should I let go of a person who is suited to me in every way except sexually?


*sigh*


P.S. Ex returned to Cyprus after he completed his education.

P.S.S. We have a lot in common and laugh a lot.

Anything is ok if you want it to be but my suggestion is to prepare yourself for what I believe is the inevitable. This relationship will not last.

 

[B_Hickboy]

Anything is ok if you want it to be but my suggestion is to prepare yourself for what I believe is the inevitable. This relationship will not last.

It's probably long over. Look at the date of the original post.

 

[B_Nia88]

The original poster hasn't been on the site since 04-24-2009