Is It Possible To Find A Woman That Just Wants Sex?

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
i've been looking for years for a woman that just wants sex. but i can't find one. they all want to go out and do things... brunch, coffee, travel, hiking, shopping... no sex. or at least i have to do all those things to get sex.

are there women that want to hook up? just want sex? I've never found one.

So I guess i have to just pay for it? any insight here? thanks!
 

notthatguy

Superior Member
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Jan 28, 2006
Posts
1,176
Media
0
Likes
2,871
Points
618
Location
Ottawa
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
What you are basically saying is you don't want to have a relationship just a hole for your pleasure...

For a more than once event with a female, I need to have some sort of relationship.

One night stands are for one night and to get off as much as you can before walking away.
 

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
i've never met a woman who wants or is out for a one night stand. hence the question.


What you are basically saying is you don't want to have a relationship just a hole for your pleasure...

For a more than once event with a female, I need to have some sort of relationship.

One night stands are for one night and to get off as much as you can before walking away.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gj816

wewlad202

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jan 9, 2020
Posts
469
Media
50
Likes
3,365
Points
388
Location
Springfield, Missouri, United States of America
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
Purely sex would be hard, but if you're ok with some aftercare/pillowtalk maybe? I've met one woman who is only interested in fucking. Aside from cuddling, or getting food post sex, all we do is fuck. I met her on fetlife. If you have not tried there I would say look into it, not everyone is only there for sex but some are.
 

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
good point. yeah, I agree. I'm on fetlife, but sadly only dudes contact me and ive only met 1 woman off there in over 10 years. why?

I've found most of the women there are BBW -- which isn't my thing.
Also, the hot women on there are already "owned' and only seem to be doing it because their boyfriends tell them to.
the hot ones also only seem to have profiles to support their ONLYFANS.
I've also been scolded many times on that site, saying it's NOT a website to meet people?
so yeah, meeting an attractive real girl on Fetlife is incredibly rare.

I've just come to the conclusion in all my years of being single is that women dont have the same sex drive men do.
they only want sex in the confines of a "relationship". they just don't "need" sex.
so they use sex to get what they want... brunch, a dinner, free drinks, a relationship, a new handbag, etc.



Purely sex would be hard, but if you're ok with some aftercare/pillowtalk maybe? I've met one woman who is only interested in fucking. Aside from cuddling, or getting food post sex, all we do is fuck. I met her on fetlife. If you have not tried there I would say look into it, not everyone is only there for sex but some are.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gj816

wewlad202

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jan 9, 2020
Posts
469
Media
50
Likes
3,365
Points
388
Location
Springfield, Missouri, United States of America
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
good point. yeah, I agree. I'm on fetlife, but sadly only dudes contact me and ive only met 1 woman off there in over 10 years. why?

I've found most of the women there are BBW -- which isn't my thing.
Also, the hot women on there are already "owned' and only seem to be doing it because their boyfriends tell them to.
the hot ones also only seem to have profiles to support their ONLYFANS.
I've also been scolded many times on that site, saying it's NOT a website to meet people?
so yeah, meeting an attractive real girl on Fetlife is incredibly rare.

I've just come to the conclusion in all my years of being single is that women dont have the same sex drive men do.
they only want sex in the confines of a "relationship". they just don't "need" sex.
so they use sex to get what they want... brunch, a dinner, free drinks, a relationship, a new handbag, etc.

Yeah, similar experience for me, plenty of dudes. You do kinda have to lower your expectations, but idk if its only for sex that is fine with me. I didn't think I'd want to fuck a BBW before, but after trying several its fun, but I get it if you don't want to. Fetlife is a jungle to navigate, and there probably isn't any golden city to find. Got to know what to look for and ignore all the owned and strange ones. Every where is full of Onlyfans promotions, and I get the hustle of it, but it does seem like no one is looking to actually meet or do anything which isn't for pay.

Only other places I know of are reddit (which is also onlyfans hell) or maybe tinder? I've never tried tinder so wouldn't know. Met one girl on reddit who was actually pretty damn hot, but she wanted more than just sex.

For the most part you're shit out of luck if you're trying to find a hot girl to fuck on the internet. I think you either gotta lower your standards, or forget the only sex bit. Otherwise the odds are just too low.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gj816 and Driver_tk

twoton

Superior Member
Joined
Feb 28, 2011
Posts
7,865
Media
1
Likes
8,301
Points
268
Location
Mid Atlantic
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
I think you'll just have to keep looking.
I had a girlfriend who mocked me for wanting more of a relationship than just sex.
Granted, it wasn't just sex. We'd go out to bars after work and get drunk then have sex.
We went to a movie once in the several months we dated. And then had sex.
Sometimes we'd skip the happy hour part and have sex anyway.
It didn't last.
 

Sagittarius84

Legendary Member
Joined
May 16, 2018
Posts
2,108
Media
0
Likes
2,201
Points
158
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I've found most of the women there are BBW -- which isn't my thing.
I think you need to accept that for the vast majority of women their "thing" is no sex without some measure of friendly, platonic interaction...that perhaps your own standards are preventing you from encountering what you seek, but Ill be quite honest Im sure even the women you dont deem as attractive enough would feel some type of way about a man that wants inside their vagina but can't be bothered for a cup of coffee and casual conversation. I understand not wanting to to be tied down in a relationship and would encourage you set healthy boundaries with any potential future fuckbuddy, but it skews....a bit sociopathic when people cant see basic human interactions and pleasantries as a fair price for sexual access.


My advice is do yourself a favor and dont sleep with anybody you cant imagine having coffee with.
 

Motion-of-the-Ocean

Worshipped Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jun 7, 2013
Posts
9,719
Media
423
Likes
23,124
Points
408
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
Almost every woman I've been with has only wanted me for sex, but since that was in the realm of the swinging lifestyle, I'm guessing that doesn't count. And even then they still had to kind of get to know me and like me as a person at least a little before anything sexual. Outside of that, I wouldn't imagine there would be many opportunities; through granted some might be into occasional hookups, friends-with benefits and booty calls. So if just seeking a woman as a fuckhole is your goal, I think your multi-year search will still be ongoing.

Women are wired differently (shocking I know) and prefer some sort of relationship within the framework of sex or at least the knowledge a guy wants to be around them for more than getting their rocks off. Though to be fair, a lot of men do as well. As great as sometimes casual stranger sex was, I still prefer it with someone I have feelings for and enjoy doing other things with, such as my wife. Sounds to me like you want all the reward without putting in the effort. So beyond maybe trying your hand at having sex with married women as a single guy at a swing club, I don't see you have many options. Even then you will be one of many and have to make yourself stand out and most of the time that still includes traits beyond simply having a dick no matter how special you think it is.
 

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
yeah, i agree with all your points. I too have sought refuge in the "lifestyle". however to your point, there still is that rote, trial period of "get to know you" to make the women feel comfortable.It does help to take the pressure off us not having to provide some kind of emotional stability for them, we get to just show up and have fun, but even that can be perilous and frought with complications.

I can't tell you how many wives and girlfriends i've met who utter upon seeing me, "I'm so nervous." as if they're doing it against their will.

And then it's equally difficult to find a couple that doesn't have a pushy husband. Often times I've found it's the woman or girlfriend doing it just to please their boyfriend or husband -- which makes it difficult for me. I don't want to be with a woman just because her boyfriend gets off on it, you know?

Obviously too, single women in the lifestyle are called "unicorns". Simply because it's impossibly rare to find a single woman who is up to just hook up and have sex.

I appreciate the comments, as it's nice to know it's not just me.


Almost every woman I've been with has only wanted me for sex, but since that was in the realm of the swinging lifestyle, I'm guessing that doesn't count. And even then they still had to kind of get to know me and like me as a person at least a little before anything sexual. Outside of that, I wouldn't imagine there would be many opportunities; through granted some might be into occasional hookups, friends-with benefits and booty calls. So if just seeking a woman as a fuckhole is your goal, I think your multi-year search will still be ongoing.

Women are wired differently (shocking I know) and prefer some sort of relationship within the framework of sex or at least the knowledge a guy wants to be around them for more than getting their rocks off. Though to be fair, a lot of men do as well. As great as sometimes casual stranger sex was, I still prefer it with someone I have feelings for and enjoy doing other things with, such as my wife. Sounds to me like you want all the reward without putting in the effort. So beyond maybe trying your hand at having sex with married women as a single guy at a swing club, I don't see you have many options. Even then you will be one of many and have to make yourself stand out and most of the time that still includes traits beyond simply having a dick no matter how special you think it is.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gj816

njfellow2002

Legendary Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2007
Posts
998
Media
0
Likes
1,511
Points
323
Location
New Jersey (United States)
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
i've been looking for years for a woman that just wants sex. but i can't find one. they all want to go out and do things... brunch, coffee, travel, hiking, shopping... no sex. or at least i have to do all those things to get sex.

are there women that want to hook up? just want sex? I've never found one.

So I guess i have to just pay for it? any insight here? thanks!

--OK--first the joke " one way or another, you always pay for it "

BUT-- Lots of great comments here, and the trend seems to be that if you want a 'regular' steady thing, some investment of self may be needed. It is gonna happen regardless unless you never speak to each other--

If you just want sex, as others have said, look into the swinging lifestyle. It is a little harder for a single guy, but if you have the body, and the personality, you can make a few regular FWB friends..but hubbies might want to be involved too.
Which leads to next part- Being the stud for a cuck-couple. Hubby most likely wants to watch or be part of scene.
The HOT WIFE scene is good, but involves investment of time/money/dating the wife---not sure how you feel about that.

Try tinder for a while.....I hear that there are just hooks up on that..but again...many maybe 'one time only' situations. I've personally never used it.

My biggest success used to come from Craigslist. I"d post looking for a woman for erotic massage or 2-man-1-woman erotic massage. Surprising response. Found a few regulars, but most were curiosity seekers and one and done.
 

Hatt_101

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Posts
4,453
Media
72
Likes
8,271
Points
393
Location
Ontario (Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
very convincing.
Was busy so didn't have time to write a whole chapter. But I did answer the question lol.

I gotta say Fetlife is an amazing place to meet women who want sex. I'd say the majority of the girls I've met have been from there. It all how you approach someone. If you treat them like you would when talking to someone in real life. It's all about the group's you're in to find the right people.

Out side of fetlife feeld is also great it's technically for threesome but have met single women on there as well.
 

Hatt_101

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Posts
4,453
Media
72
Likes
8,271
Points
393
Location
Ontario (Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
Obviously too, single women in the lifestyle are called "unicorns". Simply because it's impossibly rare to find a single woman who is up to just hook up and have sex.
Single women are not unicorns. Unicorns are women that are bi and looking for a couple to play with equally. Applies to men in that same situation.
 

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
totally agree. I think anonymous sex is a luxury that only gay males benefit from. with women, it's more of a labored, invested process that takes time.

the interesting thing too, I find is how unaware and complicated women are. On the dating apps, they always say "i'm not that kind of girl. Look elsewhere." As if to presume there is "that kind of girl" who does appreciate sex without commitment. I've never met one, except maybe in the "lifestyle" but that's only because they're open to it, due to already having a husband.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gj816

Gj816

Mythical Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Feb 13, 2017
Posts
7,283
Media
86
Likes
26,407
Points
333
Location
Nashville (Tennessee, United States)
Verification
View
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
totally agree. I think anonymous sex is a luxury that only gay males benefit from. with women, it's more of a labored, invested process that takes time.

the interesting thing too, I find is how unaware and complicated women are. On the dating apps, they always say "i'm not that kind of girl. Look elsewhere." As if to presume there is "that kind of girl" who does appreciate sex without commitment. I've never met one, except maybe in the "lifestyle" but that's only because they're open to it, due to already having a husband.


I've had women tell me they're not that kind of girl! I'm thinking you're on a hook up site wtf? Maybe it's just the way I think as a man. Maybe not?
 

AtYourCervix10

Superior Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Posts
4,954
Media
12
Likes
3,796
Points
258
Location
California City, CA, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
what hook up site are you talking about? that's my point. i've never met a woman "looking to hook up"/ just for sex. so my point is -- there are no "hook up" sites.

even on the alleged "hook up" sites they say they're NOT looking for hook ups, only looking for chemistry and getting to know you, etc. NOT SEX.

the closest thing i've found to a "hook up" site is Seeking Arrangement, but the premise there is you have to PAY them for their time, to bypass all the "get to know you first" nonsense.

never mind the fact, that many women are doing ONLYFANS now and getting paid for their sexuality -- yet even then the girls that i've had offers to shoot content with, do it only with their husbands or boyfriends. It's quite a racquet.

I've had women tell me they're not that kind of girl! I'm thinking you're on a hook up site wtf? Maybe it's just the way I think as a man. Maybe not?