I am having premature ejaculation issues, and have been trying different things to deal with it. At best I have found that if she's giving me some stimulation and I feel myself suddenly starting to cum, I can clamp down and shut it off after the first few spurts. But is this something girls find acceptable or desirable, or do I need to try a totally different approach? In high school and at JC I was in long relationships and there was no sex for the first six months or so, and premature ejaculation was no deal-killer at that point. But now I am having sex after just a couple dates and finding the girls are quickly judgmental about how long and how well I perform. We get into it and once I'm hard, every time, I will suddenly feel the impulse hit me and the ejaculation is very quick and intense. Once it starts I don't even need to stroke, and the spurts are immediately after one another. It doesn't look like what I see pornstars do where there's lots of sex and then the guy strokes off like he's pulling the trigger on a gun. The last girl I was with, we tried having sex four times. The first, I came all over her when she was stroking me, before penetration. But she was impressed by my size and she tried to get me hard again for another hour, with no success. We talked about it and I agreed for the next date I'd jerk off beforehand. But the next time, we tried for a couple hours and she could get me somewhat hard with a blowjob, but once the condom went on I kept losing my erection. She was on BC so after several tries she wanted to try it without the condom, but even without it I kept going limp for no reason. She was very frustrated to know how big I could get and yet she was unable to keep me hard. The third time, I didn't jerk off beforehand and wanted to try early penetration with a condom. She really, really liked my size this time and was getting very loud and I could feel I'd got much bigger and harder and knew there would be trouble. I tried to hold it, but once I felt the urge, every time I tried to thrust, I could feel myself cumming. She really wanted it so I tried to just keep pounding her. Then I started getting soft so I pulled out, and I'd shrunk so fast I almost lost the condom, which it turned out had ripped anyway. I'd cum a lot and she was not happy with the mess. The last time, I wanted to gradually ratchet up the stimulation instead of trying to penetrate her immediately, so I had her first stroke and then blow me. Both times I started cumming but managed to stay clamped down and not bust my whole load. She seemed turned on by my state of arousal (I was really, really hard) but she wasn't eager to try penetration until I'd shown more control, so I tried titty-fucking her, and again, once I felt the urge, I couldn't thrust without cumming, and I got it on her face this time. She cleaned up, tried to get me hard again, but I couldn't get hard after cumming, and she'd had enough. I could tell she was very annoyed and didn't answer my calls last week. So, I'm kind of pondering what tactics to use with the next girl. Getting and maintaining an erection is very difficult for me once I've cum. I noticed she didn't seem to mind my leaking cum when she was really stroking me, and was turned on by my cock. So I am thinking the next thing to try is letting the girl do more of the work and I'll just focus on not shooting my whole wad before she's satisfied. But my concern there is if girls are turned off by me leaking when I get near my redline the whole evening.