Is meeting someone from Craigslist safe?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by whatireallywant, Jun 16, 2007.

  1. whatireallywant

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    I am just wondering, as I have just answered a Craigslist ad that has me VERY intrigued (he fits both of my fantasies - very well endowed and considerably younger than me). I'm fanatical about safety, both against disease and also against abusive weirdos. Have any of the women here had good experiences? Bad ones?
     
  2. SassySpy

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    oooooh girlie Im not one to tell others what to do.............. but oh man, the horror stories from Craigslist are legendary.
    Ive met loads of guys from net interactions, and am SO looking forward to my next one in a couple weeks- but I have always been very careful so have not had a bad ie, dangerous, experience.
    PLEASE think carefully about this and dont do anything without safeguards in place.
     
  3. Principessa

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    I may be the anomaly but I met a totally arrogant, lieing, cheating, tiny-dicked jerk from Craigslist last fall. I would be very hesitant to try that particular venue again.

    Be careful, don't bring him to your place, go to a hotel. I'm not sure why that site attracts so many freaks and losers but they do.
     
  4. whatireallywant

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    He wants me to go to his place. I have some suspicions because he wants me to bring the condoms because "he doesn't have any and his car is in the shop all weekend". I would never bring a guy to my place anyway, until I have met him, etc. I did meet someone through personal ads (one I took out!) who I did bring to my place eventually. He was totally safe. I screened out the ones who were into being dominant (NOT my thing), ones who asked me a bunch of questions about my breast size (I'm small so they'd be disappointed), etc. This guy has not done any of the above things I screen out for. The only thing was that his face pic was so dark I could barely see anything. I'm wondering if he's ugly. And then there is the thing about his car supposedly being in the shop. But then, you know it really could be.

    I did go out with a guy from that ad I took out a while back who was so ugly I didn't want to do anything. Thing is, he actually had a pretty good personality. If he had only been better looking...not necessarily demanding that he look like a movie star but the guy had bad teeth, and that's a big no-no for me!

    If you don't like Craigslist, how do you suggest that I meet reasonably attractive, SINGLE, safe, well endowed men? (oh yeah, I definitely screen out the married ones too - I'm not a homewrecker)
     
  5. whatireallywant

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    What safeguards do you suggest? I am not having him come to my place - I would be going to his place. Someone once suggested to let a friend know where I was, but that is not an option now. If any one of my friends here knew what I was doing I would be labeled a tramp and I would no longer have any friends.

    Oh, and he seems to be in a really big hurry for me to come over. Is that something to be suspicious of, too?
     
  6. SpoiledPrincess

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    Don't go to his place, he'll have you alone and at his mercy. Talk to him several times on the phone, don't give him your address, then meet in a public place. Once you've met in a public place you'll have much more of a feeling as to whether he's a nut or not, let a friend know where you're going and with whom, and if you're going to get in his car before you get in (in a public place) let him see you text his registration number to a friend, it might sound paranoid but it makes sense and if he's a genuine guy hell quite understand your concerns.
     
  7. jeff black

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    Ms. What, I think it is important to note that any relationship online has it's own rewards and risks. Meeting a complete stranger is always a risk, however, I have a few thoughts for you.

    1) Meet the guy in a public place and have a "date" with him. Don't just go for a booty call. Allowing yourself to have a date will give you the ability to weed out if he is a weirdo.

    2) Try and get things to go in your terms... ie) your location of choice etc... this will allow you to feel a bit more safe if it is planned out.

    3) Bring some condoms. It will reduce your risk for disease.

    4) If you are worried he is a pyscho, go into the meeting a little skeptical and let him win you over... This way, you won't get your feelings hurt.

    BTW, him not having condoms makes me feel that it is a younger YOUNGER male, who is possibly pulling one on you... Step up and make him do a few things... Meeting people should be a 2-way street. If you do all the work, you are gonna end up hurting.
     
  8. B_josiah852

    B_josiah852 New Member

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  9. Onslow

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    Craigslist? Gee, why don't you just make your pickup from an internet chat room? Neither is particularly safe.

    If you decide that you must do this, then at least let someone know where you are headed to or some other detail for your own overalll security.
     
  10. whatireallywant

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    Hey, I'm careful too. I don't think anything is going to happen. I'm too suspicious. The latest is that he wants me to call him but block my number. That just sounds too suspicious to me. Plus supposedly his car is in the shop, so we could not meet in a public place. I'm starting to think he's a weirdo or hiding something.

    I can't let a friend know about any of this. My friends are all rather conservative sexually and would label me a tramp, and I would no longer have any friends. I also don't have a cell phone, so I can't do any texting.

    When I had placed the ad I placed a few years ago, I had one or two open minded friends who I could let in on what I was doing. The one guy I did have to go to his place and pick him up, because he was unable to drive (and he was not lying about that - he was honestly legally blind). I had a nice FWB relationship with him for several months and he was totally safe.

    I am getting very antsy though - remember it has been six years since I've had sex. That is terribly frustrating to someone with a sex drive like mine.
     
  11. SpoiledPrincess

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    I think you're right to get antsy, there are too many things that sound fishy here. tell him to bugger off.
     
  12. whatireallywant

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    Hey all, I've decided not to do this. I have too many suspicions. I did have that one good experience from the personals a few years ago, and one other guy from the same ad, who was ugly but seemed safe. (I didn't have sex with the ugly one though). I met them at a public place, although I did have to pick up the one guy because he was legally blind. He turned out to be telling the truth. I was lucky there, I'll admit. I didn't have any problems safety-wise.

    And I don't have any open minded friends to let know. I wish I did, but my friends here are rather prudish, at least about reality. They will watch Sex and the City, and they may even like the character Samantha, but if someone they knew actually behaved as Samantha does on the show, they would not like her.

    I've sent him an email saying that I am no longer interested. He requires me to block my number when I call him in order to be "discreet". That's a big clue for me that he is a weirdo or married. I'm better off alone, even with my frustration.

    What are some good (reasonably safe) ways to meet people who are what I am looking for?
     
  13. whatireallywant

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    Have already done so. I think too many things sounded fishy too.
     
  14. whatireallywant

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    Update - He emailed me back on why he wanted to be "discreet". He isn't married, but he has a girlfriend. I made the right decision to say that I was no longer interested. I don't need that kind of drama.
     
  15. SpoiledPrincess

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  16. whatireallywant

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    Hey, I'm not a weirdo myself nor am I a tramp, although I may appear to be one to the more prudish people out there. (a tramp that is, probably not a weirdo since I don't think anyone has accused me of being abusive or anything)

    Anyway, what are some good ways for me to go about meeting someone for a FWB situation? Or eventually even a relationship, although right now I'm going through such upheavals in my career and finances that a relationship may have to hold off for a while. And how do I meet someone who, uh... is what I want in the size department? (not the only criteria, mind you, but something I have to consider)
     
  17. wildman1376

    wildman1376 New Member

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    where are you from? south carolina here
     
  18. whatireallywant

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    I live in Texas.
     
  19. umass1

    umass1 New Member

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    I met one of my ex-roomates from craigslist. He was a TOTAL FREAK. Be careful.
     
  20. whatireallywant

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    I am very careful. As for roommates, I don't want them. I've never had good luck with roommates. I didn't get them off Craigslist either! I'm talking about college roommates, and one roommate who had been my best friend before, and did me DIRTY! If I absolutely had to have a roommate (and I may since I'm unemployed and broke!), I would ask my friends about that.

    I have placed a personal ad before (back in 1999), under 'casual encounters' stating specifically what I was looking for. I weeded out the obvious weirdos and such, and wound up meeting someone who was completely safe and I had no problems with him. So I know that they do exist.

    I'm still waiting for ideas on where to meet someone and stay safe!
     
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