Is my gaydar broken?

[MovingForward]

Maybe your Gaydar is fine. Every single guy I have an attraction to, I feel in the right circumstance and situation something could happen. This apply's to straight guys too. In my life, one was a very good friend, who I still consider straight. He was just interested and said if he was going to try something, he wanted it to be with someone he trusted.

The second guy, kept asking me all these quesitons about being gay, how did I know. We messed around, but he is married now and has a child.

There is a co-worker I have an attraction to, I have a girl co-worker that ha slept with him , but he gives off this sexuality that seems like he would get down.

I once had a straight co-worker that was hung, Even though I was trying very hard to be straight. He was talking about how he was working out and said he had a six pack, but I asked to see it cause I didnt believe it So he showed me his six pac, and later he told me that he knew I was gay, becuase when he showed me his six pac, he told me my mouth dropped open. Well anyway he always said he had a big dick, and this gilr said she wanted to see, so he took her to the back and asked me if I wanted to come along to. I wanted so bad to go see also, but I didnt. Later he did tell me when he was younger he did have a threesome with him another guy and this girl. He told me he did suck the other guys dick during the threesome. So I knew he wasnt completely straight, but because I had an attraction to him, I knew I was right, that something possibly could have happened.

 

[Dave NoCal]

A gay organization? Let's see.

In the medium sized city where I live, there is a GLBT community center. They have a variety of functions. They also do volunteer work. For example, a few years ago an Asian family's fruit stand was burned down overnight in a act that was arson and maybe inspired by racism. Within a day or two, some folks who knew each other through the center got together, collected building materials and went out and rebuilt the fruit stand, which was this family's main source of income. So they were out with hammers, power saws, trucks, etc... It was a good thing to do but it was also a bonding opportunity and very good publicity.

In California, there is an organization called Equality California that works for political change. It is statewide but has regional actvities and efforts. There is a Metropolitan Community Church, if you go for that sort of thing, which I don't. There is a Unitarian church that, obviously, isn't gay but historically that denomination has been VERY gay-friendly. There is a Methodist church that defines itself as "welcoming" and is regularly attended by GLBT people. There's some other sort of new-age spirituality group attended by many BLBT people that I just heard about.That's not to mention the theatre groups that can be pretty gay-friendly and perheps other things I haven't heard about.

Participating in such things gives you an opportunity to evaluate what kind of person you are dealing with and shared tasks tend to build relationships.

 

[Jeffin90620]

Why is it that I fall for the straight or "straight" guys rather than the guys I have a legitimate chance with? Is it the maculinity factor? I'm personally not sure.

I read all sort of personal ads (for the amusement factor... I only dated one woman I met from a dating site and that was many, many years ago) and at least half of the ads from transgendered (the current catch-all term for cross-dressers and pre-op & post op transexuals) people specify "straight" men.

Not that I'm suggesting you shave your legs and put on some makeup & a dress; just telling you that you are not alone (and that you also have competition).

 

[B_Think_Kink]

My gaydar is practically nonexistent! (I was married to a gay man for 10 years!):biggrin1: (He was a good looking, masculine fellow -- not macho at all, just very alpha.)

However, I'd say that you probably dig the masculinity factor.

You are so gorgeous, Syddy, that I'm surprised that you haven't had a relationship yet. :wink:

Single girls depend a LOT on friends to make introductions and connect them up. This might work for you too.

So.... might I suggest getting a "girlfriend" -- not in the sexual sense, but in a FRIEND sense. A friend who's also gay who knows the local gay scene and can help show "you around"

Yes... grab a fag hag or two. Chances are if they dig you for being gay... they have more gay friends. Girls (ok not all of them aparently ) are good with gaydar (or at least I'm awesome at that game). It's just the vibe I get... I dunno.

Anyhow grab some lady friends (they are good to have anyhow for breakups and stuff, we like to love our gay boys) and see what happens from there. College should be full of gay guys. Good luck hun ^.^

 

[B_RedDude]

I turned 21 on the 6th, so I shouldn't have any trouble visiting a bar. Problem is, I don't drink... so I don't know exactly what I'd do there. I'm not very good for small-talk. n_n;

Syd, do you like Coke or cranberry juice or something else non-alcoholic?

Try going to a gay bar with big video screens playing. It's something to focus on rather than just standing around feeling too self-concious.