Is my luck this bad?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by wldr69, May 25, 2008.

  1. wldr69

    wldr69 New Member

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    Kinda strange coming to a board to ask dating advise from guys (and girls) I don't know, and I've only lurked on... but, what the heck right?

    Quick back ground... I'm 29, 6' tall, lil over weight, but not sloppy over weight, I'll admit I'm not exactly a greek god, but I'm not fugly either... just your average kinda guy. Not into drugs at all, never smoke and very rarely drink. Since we're on a penis board, I'm a little longer than average, around 6.5" long or so and decently thick... once again not a monster, but my lil buddy has never gotten a laugh either. I have a great career, I make a very comfortable living (especially for my area), have my own house, nice truck, nice things. Over all I'm a pretty darn nice guy, nicer than most guys I've met (especially towards the female gender).

    My last relationship ended just over a year ago, was with her for 7 years, married for a whopping 4 months of that before she left for the grass that was greener (turns out it was a tumble weed, but that's another story).

    I never have been a ladies man by any means, but I've never had much trouble either, until recently. I swear I could have a bucket of water and be ignored by ladies who are ablaze. I'm by far not expecting to find my next soul mate, but I'm kind of looking for something more than friends too. Even though it sounds cliche, I truly do believe that women aren't interested in a successful nice guy any more. I'm about 95% sure I'm not doing the too desperate clingy bad stuff too...

    The most common scenario's I've had are slipping right into that friends role (not horrible, but not always fun either), or I manage to find the married women who tell me they wish their hubby was like me and would date me in a heart beat if they weren't married. The other oddities would be the girl who won't talk much or even hang out (most common one), or out of the few ladies whom I'm not invisible to, are everything I don't want.

    Just for kicks and giggles, here's my semi criteria list. (in importance)
    1. Must have a job, or even better, a career
    2. Preferably non smoker or light smoker, no choo choo trains for me.
    3. Must not be ugly... I'm not expecting any models (not opposed either lol), but honestly, there's got to be some physical attraction too..
    4. Drinking is fine, but social drinking only, no alcoholics or people who feel the need to get trashed every chance they can.
    5. No kids, or if they do, a kid or 2 from a previous serious relationship is fine. I'm not into the girls who have 3 kids by 5 dads all with in a few years.

    Not terribly picky I don't think, yet it rules out at least half or more of the women around here. I've attempted meeting girls through my friends, the internet, via the few times I go out, nothing is working.

    I know this is a very brief description, but from what you experts can see, any tips on where to steer myself back on track?
     
  2. Phil Ayesho

    Gold Member

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    By SD do you mean South Dakota?


    If so, adviso numero uno is get da fuck outta South Dakota...

    So someplace civilized.
     
  3. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    As I'm not in the market, I can only advise you based on what two other friends have told me. Both of them discovered this site accidentally and both report that it has done wonders for their dating. One guy, a completely geeky nerd type, now calls going out, "shooting fish in a barrel:"

    Dating Tips

    If you search for, "David DeAngelo" on torrent sites, you'll find a lot of material. Each of my friends used that material and it's been rather shocking. I don't know if any of it works with guys looking for guys. Anyone know?

    Yeah, RC, SD = Rapid City, South Dakota
     
  4. lilbighorn

    lilbighorn New Member

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    Are any women, or men, interested in nice guys? Usually things start off on a sexual level to some degree. This being the case, there has to be some "bad boy" angle, mischevious humor, etc. to get thinkings fired up. Later, the sanity returns. Heh.

    Then again, as stated, you are not in NY, so there are probably not tons of women on every corner there in SD.

    One day, the tide will turn, don't ask me how this happens, and you'll have more than you can handle. (You know, like when you think your hair looks like sh*t, and everyone is complimenting you on it?) When that happens, be ready.
     
  5. wldr69

    wldr69 New Member

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    Yup, you guys are correct about the South Dakota part. Honestly though I may complain about it now and then, but I do like it here for just about every other reason other than women.

    I do think part of my problem is a bit more of a desire to start off as friends and go on from there, even though, being friends isn't my end goal. I'm not sure why, but I've always kind of taken that road. Partially I guess because I'd rather know what I'm getting into vs jump in with both feet and pray there some sanity there. Coming from a guy, this might sounds like complete BS, but honestly sex isn't my #1 goal. I do like sex of course, but to some degree I find it a bit more enjoyable to have sex while in a relationship vs one night stands or booty calls from time to time. Way I see it, darn near anyone can find sex, especially if you lower the standards enough, but to find even a half assed sort of relationship, even if it's not a long term for life thing is a bit trickier.

    Another of my known problems, reflecting upon myself, is that I'm honest. By that I'm not willing to throw out tons of BS stories to attract women, or pretend to be someone I'm not. I do realize to a certain extent you have to strut your feather, but I don't think I need to turn into someone I'm not to find someone either.

    Right now it's just an awkward age to be single. If I had an age range I'd prefer would be 25-35. But, in that age range I seem to find the women who are either happily married, or recently divorced and ready to tear up the town to prove something. I could go a few years younger, but that's venturing into the some what immature ages (not all, just most), and much older.. and well... I dunno how to say this, but I don't want to date some old lady lol. BTW, ladies who might fall in this category, nothing personal against you, just one of them catches I have.

    Everyone tell me to not look for a woman,just let it happen. Hell of a theory, but it's seriously flawed. My line of work (heating and cooling) isn't exactly a great way to meet women, my hobbies, racing, once again, some what of a male dominated sport, especially around here, and I've yet to have the bikini team bus break down in front of my house (I'm really holding out hope for this one though).

    I do completely realize when the tide turns I'll be cursing the day it happens and wish for the more simple days when I didn't have to try to juggle several women or be selective lol
     
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