Is naked / nudism a sexual thing to you?

[Ballstowalls]

First off I don't know HOW I've never come across this site before! It's definitely my jam. Came across it last night when I was searching "celery seed." LOL Just funny to me.

So I'm gonna load this question (no pun intended) with some info to get to my various questions... (I promise future posts won't be this rambling)

A lil background... I've dated women, I've dated guys. I personally don't really identify with a sexual preference per se. Actually just creating a profile here I found it a bit antiquated in 2018 that people still care "percentage of str8 - gayness" but I digress and I get it.

SO.... I've never really been wired to pop a boner just seeing a naked guy (or girl). Not gonna go into that much but sets up my question. To ME nakedness wasn't something sexual.

I have never really "liked" clothes, but definitely wasn't a nudist. I don't wear underwear or tight clothes etc., just feels restrictive to me is the best way to describe it.

My first "nudist experience" was when I visited a Korean Spa. I had never hung out naked with other guys like that ever. It wasn't about the guys, it was about the freedom I felt if that makes sense.

I was hooked. I absolutely loved just bein to sweat it out ballstowalls haha This was about 6-7 years ago before the Korean spas basically turned into a gay bathhouse. It was when I started going at night after the bars that I noticed the energy was different. I saw a guy getting a body scrub gettin a boner at that brought my lil soldier to attention. I discovered that seeing someone get turned on, turned me on. Idk if that's voyerism or what but that's not the point.

One day a guy and I struck up a convo randomly about being from the same hometown. There was no "play" no sexual tension, just a convo between two people. He asked how long I had been coming there etc, I shared with him some of what I just explained and we exchanged numbers to connect next time we were going.

I lived in a place at the time that had a private roof top deck that of course I would lay out naked on as often as I could. The next time we met up at the spa, I invited him to come hang some weekend. There was no motive or strategy on either end.

He came over one weekend and laid out and had a few beers and just talked and chilled. He said he was straight, and by this time I had dropped the bitch and made the switch and shared that with him as well. We actually became friends for years till he moved.

I thought I had officially become a nudist. However laying out on the roof, or hangin at the spa was my limit so to speak. For some reason it felt awkward to me hangin out naked sittin on my couch watching a movie or whatever. I'm not sure why other than to ME I wasn't doin anything that "warranted" bein naked. Not too long after, I met a new friend (gay) who had a house in the desert that he went to on the weekends. When Id drive out to visit within 5 mins of arriving I'd say hi, grab a beer and be naked in the pool. That was his vibe too. Never anything sexual.

We're gettin close to an actual question here... hang on LMAO

My "5 year plan" was to fulfill a dream of mine and buy a house with my own pool just like my friend. I recently accomplished that, and you guessed it, the DAY I got my keys, I didn't even unpack a single thing... walked in the house stripped down and jumped in MY pool.

Shortly after getting house I decided to go out for drinks by myself and just check things out. Started at str8 bar ended at gay bar where I met this group of people I ended up laughing my ass off with. At bar close I said they were welcome to come over for drinks. (again nothing sexual, I'm a late nighter and all my adult life my pad was always where people came to pre drink or after bar drink etc)

All were tourists.. one str8 guy and str8 girl (not couple,) One gay single guy and two guys who were boyfriends and me.

We came in made drinks and went to have a smoke by the pool. (oh btw I have a completely private backyard)

Here's where I'm stuck and want opinions...

I am always naked in my pool. It actually seems weird to me to get undressed to put on clothes to jump in my own pool.

So one of the boyfriends was the first to say he felt like jumpin in. I offered a pair of gym shorts etc, but no one moved. The boyfriends seemed a little uncomfortable compared to when we were all at the bar. I realized as the host maybe I should break the ice (also I was drunk) hahah

So I walked to the hot tub, got naked and got in. Single gay guy did the same. Girl didn't get naked or get in cuz she didn't want her new extensions to get wet LOL but sat on the side of the hot tub and drank and chatted with us. I felt I was successful at putting everyone at ease.

However I noticed the boyfriends still sitting over on the patio and the str8 guy. We prodded them to get in, but the boyfriends said they were tired and left (it was like 3am at this point). And minutes later the str8 guy said bye to his friend (str8 girl) and left too.

The 3 of us stayed up drinkin and laughing our asses off for another 2 hours and they left. They were / are two of the funniest people I've ever met.

The next day I started over thinking things... gay guy and str8 guy ended up becoming friends. Gay guy doesn't give a crap and jumps in naked when he's over. Str8 guy have gone out to the bars several times and had a blast, but he's never come back over for some reason.

My question is... does nakedness always insinuate something sexual to everyone else but me? Did the boyfriends think the night was gonna turn into a f*@k fest and that's why they suddenly left? Str8 guy is obviously comfortable enough to hang at a gay bar, but did the sight of dick traumatize him? LOL

I'm a lil gun shy now about offering / suggesting we hot tub or pool to new people who come over because I don't want them to seem like "that guy".

And I don't have to be naked of course. I just don't understand why someone wouldn't want to be. I do have a couple friends who have visited and wanted to get in but said "oh I don't have trunks" I tell em no one cares (meaning they don't need em) or you can go grab a pair of shorts in my room. If they put on shorts then that's how I swim too.

 

[PeteFree]

I agree with you. Never liked putting on clothes to swim in water. Started early when I would swim at the Y. It’s was men only and everyone swam naked. When I do have to wear a suit it’s alwasy a Speedo.

We have a hot tub too and always are naked in there. When friends have come over we alwasy offer suits but usually everyone ends up naked. Again not sexual just freeer. (Although there have been times legs touch under water and things arise, but that’s for another conversation)

Korean saunas are the best place like you said to be free. Always looking for a buddy to go with.

Have you ever tried freehiking? I have been looking for a group to try this with but have not found one yet. I just love the idea of hiking in just boots and socks. Then cooling off in a cool swimming hole.

 

[pdxjoe]

For me naked/nudism has nothing to do with being a sexual thing in general. It is about body freedom and feeling air and sun on my skin and enjoying the company of my nude friends at a beach or pool.

 

[912164]

No, Nudism is not sexual.

 

[OKCLane]

First off I don't know HOW I've never come across this site before! It's definitely my jam. Came across it last night when I was searching "celery seed." LOL Just funny to me.

So I'm gonna load this question (no pun intended) with some info to get to my various questions... (I promise future posts won't be this rambling)

A lil background... I've dated women, I've dated guys. I personally don't really identify with a sexual preference per se. Actually just creating a profile here I found it a bit antiquated in 2018 that people still care "percentage of str8 - gayness" but I digress and I get it.

SO.... I've never really been wired to pop a boner just seeing a naked guy (or girl). Not gonna go into that much but sets up my question. To ME nakedness wasn't something sexual.

I have never really "liked" clothes, but definitely wasn't a nudist. I don't wear underwear or tight clothes etc., just feels restrictive to me is the best way to describe it.

My first "nudist experience" was when I visited a Korean Spa. I had never hung out naked with other guys like that ever. It wasn't about the guys, it was about the freedom I felt if that makes sense.

I was hooked. I absolutely loved just bein to sweat it out ballstowalls haha This was about 6-7 years ago before the Korean spas basically turned into a gay bathhouse. It was when I started going at night after the bars that I noticed the energy was different. I saw a guy getting a body scrub gettin a boner at that brought my lil soldier to attention. I discovered that seeing someone get turned on, turned me on. Idk if that's voyerism or what but that's not the point.

One day a guy and I struck up a convo randomly about being from the same hometown. There was no "play" no sexual tension, just a convo between two people. He asked how long I had been coming there etc, I shared with him some of what I just explained and we exchanged numbers to connect next time we were going.

I lived in a place at the time that had a private roof top deck that of course I would lay out naked on as often as I could. The next time we met up at the spa, I invited him to come hang some weekend. There was no motive or strategy on either end.

He came over one weekend and laid out and had a few beers and just talked and chilled. He said he was straight, and by this time I had dropped the bitch and made the switch and shared that with him as well. We actually became friends for years till he moved.

I thought I had officially become a nudist. However laying out on the roof, or hangin at the spa was my limit so to speak. For some reason it felt awkward to me hangin out naked sittin on my couch watching a movie or whatever. I'm not sure why other than to ME I wasn't doin anything that "warranted" bein naked. Not too long after, I met a new friend (gay) who had a house in the desert that he went to on the weekends. When Id drive out to visit within 5 mins of arriving I'd say hi, grab a beer and be naked in the pool. That was his vibe too. Never anything sexual.

We're gettin close to an actual question here... hang on LMAO

My "5 year plan" was to fulfill a dream of mine and buy a house with my own pool just like my friend. I recently accomplished that, and you guessed it, the DAY I got my keys, I didn't even unpack a single thing... walked in the house stripped down and jumped in MY pool.

Shortly after getting house I decided to go out for drinks by myself and just check things out. Started at str8 bar ended at gay bar where I met this group of people I ended up laughing my ass off with. At bar close I said they were welcome to come over for drinks. (again nothing sexual, I'm a late nighter and all my adult life my pad was always where people came to pre drink or after bar drink etc)

All were tourists.. one str8 guy and str8 girl (not couple,) One gay single guy and two guys who were boyfriends and me.

We came in made drinks and went to have a smoke by the pool. (oh btw I have a completely private backyard)

Here's where I'm stuck and want opinions...

I am always naked in my pool. It actually seems weird to me to get undressed to put on clothes to jump in my own pool.

So one of the boyfriends was the first to say he felt like jumpin in. I offered a pair of gym shorts etc, but no one moved. The boyfriends seemed a little uncomfortable compared to when we were all at the bar. I realized as the host maybe I should break the ice (also I was drunk) hahah

So I walked to the hot tub, got naked and got in. Single gay guy did the same. Girl didn't get naked or get in cuz she didn't want her new extensions to get wet LOL but sat on the side of the hot tub and drank and chatted with us. I felt I was successful at putting everyone at ease.

However I noticed the boyfriends still sitting over on the patio and the str8 guy. We prodded them to get in, but the boyfriends said they were tired and left (it was like 3am at this point). And minutes later the str8 guy said bye to his friend (str8 girl) and left too.

The 3 of us stayed up drinkin and laughing our asses off for another 2 hours and they left. They were / are two of the funniest people I've ever met.

The next day I started over thinking things... gay guy and str8 guy ended up becoming friends. Gay guy doesn't give a crap and jumps in naked when he's over. Str8 guy have gone out to the bars several times and had a blast, but he's never come back over for some reason.

My question is... does nakedness always insinuate something sexual to everyone else but me? Did the boyfriends think the night was gonna turn into a f*@k fest and that's why they suddenly left? Str8 guy is obviously comfortable enough to hang at a gay bar, but did the sight of dick traumatize him? LOL

I'm a lil gun shy now about offering / suggesting we hot tub or pool to new people who come over because I don't want them to seem like "that guy".

And I don't have to be naked of course. I just don't understand why someone wouldn't want to be. I do have a couple friends who have visited and wanted to get in but said "oh I don't have trunks" I tell em no one cares (meaning they don't need em) or you can go grab a pair of shorts in my room. If they put on shorts then that's how I swim too.

Hi and welcome to the site @Ballstowalls.
Nudity is a difficult thing. I would suggest that the biggest issue at your gathering was its eclectic nature. The gay couple saw no potential partners and the straight guy felt like the odd man out. People have to be comfortable in their own skin and need to understand the agenda of the gathering.
My first partner (deceased) and I had the party house. Private backyard, pool, hot tub, massive deck, grill, koi pond and enough hidden areas for a little fun if you were inclined. We had parties where it was just grilling and chilling out but also nudity wasn’t a big deal and probably 75% were nude, including us - the hosts. We also threw fuck parties where grilling and chilling were the same but a poolside blowjob was common. We had a bedroom set up with lube and condoms and couples might have a turn in there, or maybe several couples. As darkness overtook the pool there was more outside fun.
All this to say, be intentional in who you invite over and make sure that everyone is on the same page. Some friends of mine host a big summer swim and grill party which we attend. It’s well known that the event turns sexual at dark. We choose to leave, as do others, and it’s not an issue.
The fear of the unknown is what you have to overcome as the host.

 

[evolution]

My question is... does nakedness always insinuate something sexual to everyone else but me?

No, not everyone - but I think to many.
It does to me, I actually am pursuing nudism at this time, trying to break the association in my mind.

As to the hot tub, I would not just jump in. I associate groups in hot tubs with underwater exploration leading to ....
I'd have to know the other players well, understand the unspoken dynamics at play.

But oddly - no problem, no qualms if everyone were to get nude & hop into a pool. I guess I want to be able to see a grope coming.

 

[Anton565]

For me naked/nudism has nothing to do with being a sexual thing in general. It is about body freedom and feeling air and sun on my skin and enjoying the company of my nude friends at a beach or pool.

Agreed, it's the people and their dynamics that bring any sexual component. Nakedness/nudism by itself doesn't have any.

My personal preference is for events that have a play area secluded from the main event such that if you didn't know about the play area beforehand, you'd never know it was there.

 

[zalder]

Not at all. Almost the contrary in fact.
When I go to nudist places (spas in Germany, mostly), I feel absolutely nothing sexual. I register the notable sexual features of people, it does not go beyond that. I never feel arousal.

For sex, nudity means nothing, the setting is all.

 

[nudeguy1958]

I used to belong to a gay/bi male group in Minnesota called Naked Minnesota. They had many events every month and sex was not allowed during an event. I loved being nude with other men and had gone to a week long nudist event in eastern Kansas. It was so great not to wear clothes for an entire week and being with lots of men nude as well. Being nude doesn't need to be sexual at all.

 

[Ballstowalls]

Hi and welcome to the site @Ballstowalls.
Nudity is a difficult thing. I would suggest that the biggest issue at your gathering was its eclectic nature. The gay couple saw no potential partners and the straight guy felt like the odd man out. People have to be comfortable in their own skin and need to understand the agenda of the gathering.
My first partner (deceased) and I had the party house. Private backyard, pool, hot tub, massive deck, grill, koi pond and enough hidden areas for a little fun if you were inclined. We had parties where it was just grilling and chilling out but also nudity wasn’t a big deal and probably 75% were nude, including us - the hosts. We also threw fuck parties where grilling and chilling were the same but a poolside blowjob was common. We had a bedroom set up with lube and condoms and couples might have a turn in there, or maybe several couples. As darkness overtook the pool there was more outside fun.
All this to say, be intentional in who you invite over and make sure that everyone is on the same page. Some friends of mine host a big summer swim and grill party which we attend. It’s well known that the event turns sexual at dark. We choose to leave, as do others, and it’s not an issue.
The fear of the unknown is what you have to overcome as the host.

Some interesting perspectives! Thanks!

I understand "events" or parties where sex is on the menu, or even when it's a clothing optional thing.

Like I said, when friends are over it's really a non issue because they already know the "house rules" so to speak. I don't care what they wear or don't and nor do they.

I guess my issue was more about how to approach the issue with new friends or people visiting. I guess the best option was mentioned above, just simply offer a swim suit if they want one and if they don't so be it!

 

[RamblingCock]

Great question.

The answer is that a LOT of people in the U.S. - the large majority, I'd guess - DO equate nudity and sex. Its a shame, but our society is getting both more liberated and pruder at the same time. (Same dynamic is happening in politics.)

Like you I simply like to be nude when I swim or lay out to tan. If I'm with my wife or my best friend I've got no issues stripping down and hopping in our spa or pool (if it's heated), and they are perfectly happy to join me - though my wife wears a bathing suit. BUT at separate times. My wife has seen me nude, obviously. My best buddy has seen me nude, and been naked himself, on many, many occasions. But they've never seen me naked at the same time (we can be naked with our buddies, and naked with our spouses, but can never undress when both are in the room at the same time. Weird social behavior, that), nor have they ever been naked in front of each other. (He and I have invited our wives into the spa with us, swimsuits on, but they've never taken us up on it.)

I talked about male bonding while naked in my most recent blog post and mentioned social nudity versus sex here and here. It's a fascinating topic for me. Like you I'm not a nudist, but I enjoy being clothes-free in a number of settings.

My suggestion is to let the "new friends" or guests know that you usually use the pool nude, but if they're uncomfortable with it you'd be happy to don a suit. One of the ways we break the ice is a large "We don't skinny dip, we chunky dunk" sign on the wall next to the hot tub. It's amusing, but it lets people know they may encounter naked people. Well, me at least.

We've had both kind of parties. NONE have been sexual or even suggestive of it. If everyone else is dressed, so am I. If they have no problem going naked then I do too.

Years ago I worked with an artist who was a nudist. Definitely a member of LPSG. When he met people at his studio he would don a very skimpy little robe. I told him up front that he could be as naked as he wanted, I didn't mind. So, from that point on we'd conduct business with me in a suit and him naked as a jaybird. Probably an amusing sight, but it worked fine for us.

It's your house, you make the rules. Just be upfront with newer guests and make the first time their comfort level. If the come back, then your rules apply.

 

[Ballstowalls]

Great question.

The answer is that a LOT of people in the U.S. - the large majority, I'd guess - DO equate nudity and sex. Its a shame, but our society is getting both more liberated and pruder at the same time. (Same dynamic is happening in politics.)

Like you I simply like to be nude when I swim or lay out to tan. If I'm with my wife or my best friend I've got no issues stripping down and hopping in our spa or pool (if it's heated), and they are perfectly happy to join me - though my wife wears a bathing suit. BUT at separate times. My wife has seen me nude, obviously. My best buddy has seen me nude, and been naked himself, on many, many occasions. But they've never seen me naked at the same time (we can be naked with our buddies, and naked with our spouses, but can never undress when both are in the room at the same time. Weird social behavior, that), nor have they ever been naked in front of each other. (He and I have invited our wives into the spa with us, swimsuits on, but they've never taken us up on it.)

I talked about male bonding while naked in my most recent blog post and mentioned social nudity versus sex here and here. It's a fascinating topic for me. Like you I'm not a nudist, but I enjoy being clothes-free in a number of settings.

My suggestion is to let the "new friends" or guests know that you usually use the pool nude, but if they're uncomfortable with it you'd be happy to don a suit. One of the ways we break the ice is a large "We don't skinny dip, we chunky dunk" sign on the wall next to the hot tub. It's amusing, but it lets people know they may encounter naked people. Well, me at least.

We've had both kind of parties. NONE have been sexual or even suggestive of it. If everyone else is dressed, so am I. If they have no problem going naked then I do too.

Years ago I worked with an artist who was a nudist. Definitely a member of LPSG. When he met people at his studio he would don a very skimpy little robe. I told him up front that he could be as naked as he wanted, I didn't mind. So, from that point on we'd conduct business with me in a suit and him naked as a jaybird. Probably an amusing sight, but it worked fine for us.

It's your house, you make the rules. Just be upfront with newer guests and make the first time their comfort level. If the come back, then your rules apply.

Thanks for the thoughtful response! Browsed your blog as well and we are definitely on the same page re: lots of topics. I think nudity is the great equalizer. Having said that, that's also the reason I think a lot of people have hang ups about it. I remember years ago reading a quote from a magazine publisher to her models "Be careful how you judge what you see in the mirror because it's only a reflection of what you think of yourself."

I'm a big "energy" person. I want people to be at ease and comfortable in my home, especially if they are vacationing. I'm not judging if someone based on what they choose or don't choose to wear, I just want them to know they can feel comfortable.

Re: "We don't skinny dip, we chunky dunk" made me LOL! It actually reminded me, when I first viewed my house with the realtor, the previous owner had a sign by the pool → Nude Beach. I thought it was just a cheeky yard decoration, but maybe he had the right idea!

 

[sdbg]

For me naked/nudism has nothing to do with being a sexual thing in general. It is about body freedom and feeling air and sun on my skin and enjoying the company of my nude friends at a beach or pool.

I could not have said it better. Being on Black's Beach on a warm summer weekend with hundreds of other naked people is all about freedom from clothes. The ocean is much more enjoyable without a swimsuit, too.

 

[Cm4hjl]

For me naked/nudism has nothing to do with being a sexual thing in general. It is about body freedom and feeling air and sun on my skin and enjoying the company of my nude friends at a beach or pool.

Spot on! I feel free when naked.

 

[englad]

I live in Germany. Public nudity is nowhere near as much of a taboo here, there are even nudist sections of public parks here. So I don't view it as having sexual connotations whatsoever. Like a previous poster said, it is simply context based whether it is sexual or not. Though personally the only settings I'm ever publically naked in are at the gym.

 

[summoner]

I grew up in a very liberal family, nudity in our house was very common. I also started going to nudist beaches when I was 16 and been a nudist since then. I feel very comfortable being naked and being surrounded by naked people. So no, nudity for me is not sexual. However if it is unexpected... say if I opened the door and the delivery guy was standing there naked, I assume it could register as sexual in my head... lol

 

[LittleBuzzSaw]

Sadly it is only a problem to (most) westerners. Us stupid Americans (following the “proper” English) are the ones that made it “a thing”. Nudity *should* never have anything to do with anything sexual. The human body should be appreciated. What you *do* when naked (or clothed for that matter) is what makes anything sexual.

Side note.... growing up I was ALWAYS avoiding being naked in front of anyone or even using communal urinals. I wouldn’t even strip 3 seconds to don swimwear if a stall wasn’t available. Now I’ll be naked in front of anyone and not care.

 

[gunner71]

Well, nudity shouldn’t have the sexual connotation. I’m Brazilian, but of 100% Japanese descent and in Asia onsens (public baths) are super common.

As I was brought up in Brazil, I would be a little self conscious to strip down because it’s not something very common here. Plus, until some time ago I was not ok with the size of my tool, mainly when it’s soft.

 

[kdubb]

My answer is no. I spend time nude because I enjoy the freedom without the restrictions society places on us. When I get home, I strip as soon as possible and in a way I'm also stripping off the stress and cares of the day as well. I feel the most comfortable without clothing and my daily nudity is not sexual, its about freedom and comfort.

 

[Tomsy9877]

Sadly it is only a problem to (most) westerners. Us stupid Americans (following the “proper” English) are the ones that made it “a thing”. Nudity *should* never have anything to do with anything sexual. The human body should be appreciated. What you *do* when naked (or clothed for that matter) is what makes anything sexual.

Side note.... growing up I was ALWAYS avoiding being naked in front of anyone or even using communal urinals. I wouldn’t even strip 3 seconds to don swimwear if a stall wasn’t available. Now I’ll be naked in front of anyone and not care.

Strange but I was the same when younger, would change as fast as I could and avoid as much as possible for anyone seeing me naked. Now I want as many people as possible to see me. I not well endowed, far from it, I am just happy being naked even when my dick is shrivelled up to nothing. The feeling of freedom and being totally exposed is such a release from the stresses of modern day life. Why can’t this world accept nudity as normal as being clothed. I think we need to start a global campaign