Is the family model finished?

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Drifterwood, Nov 10, 2011.

  1. Drifterwood

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    If you have been foloowing the Wall St. and other threads in the Politics section, you will have found a lot of intelligent discussion regarding the failure of the current economic model in the West. In a nutshell, ordinary people can not afford a reasonable lifestyle without going into previously unseen levels of debt.

    I can't help but wonder whether this new reality makes marriage and child rearing even more difficult. As far as I can see, if you want to go down this route, you will need a larger house and a lot more money generally. Then of course there is the likelihood that it will all go wrong and you end up having to try to pay for two households.

    I can't see that this is the future.

    Is the family model sustainable? does it even still exist as the majority household system where you live?
     
    #1 Drifterwood, Nov 10, 2011
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2011
  2. Joll

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    It's a lot harder these days, especially when you consider it's almost impossible to afford a house without two full time wages.

    Many friends of mine are either still at home or renting a small flat in their mid-late 30s, by which time many (most?) would've had their own house in times past.

    A lot of ppl still want marriage and kids (or at least partner and kids) but are having to be ever more inventive in how to sustain it.
     
  3. D_Jacqueline_Boozann

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    Family life is attainable; it can be done -- look at the Armish? Now, if you want to live like them, yes; family life can be sustained. Most people, who aren't Armish, are too, damn greedy -- trying to compete with one another. No one wants the simple life anymore: keeping up with the Jones' is a thing of the past. My advice: live within your means -- or, don't get married or have kids.

    It used to be the time, back in the day, when people helped one another (that's why I love the Armish), the community spirit was alive and thriving, and children respected both parents and adults in the community. What happend there...to those of you who have children? By the way, I'm not married and I don't have any...but I taught high-school students, until retiring. Heavens, I've seen the changes in some students attitudes toward some adults.

    The family model may be insitituted again, when we're dead (at which time, we won't know, anyway),

    If President Obama and Michelle can live as a family unit, everyone else can...but you'll have to find secure fields where there's no recession: attorneys (depending upon which area of expertise); medical; nursing or others; mortuary science; people are going to die, cosmetology; women like to keep themselves up, recession or not (they have to search for a man); teaching, especially Special Education, recession proof; ESL; Mathematics; and mostly needed, Science.

    If prospective educators have about 2 or more endorsments, guaranteed, you'll have a job for life. My friend has Mathematics, Science, and Special Education: he has to run from interviewers.

    Men, find women who share the same moral, spiritually, educational, and sexual values has you. Just because she's fine on the outside; no gurantee, she's compatible. Get out of this Hollywood mentality, men wanting a woman like a famous, drop-dead actress; it's not going to happen in real life because you're not a part of that ilk. Be happy with whom you've chosen.

    Women: if you're a professional, find one, too. (Obama v. Michelle). All of these colleges and universities are sprouting out attractive, educated, professional, no children, men. Why aren't they being taken?

    There are many federal, city, county, and state workers who don't have relationships...they sometimes get overlooked because women are still swooning over the likes of Cloney, Pitt, and others -- unattainable, ladies.

    Finally, back in the 50s, in the south at least, teachers married principals, doctors, bakers, business owners, or men who could provide and wanted to provide for their families (mostly in the south). How it it that people can't figure how to keep from staying out of the mental institutions due to stress?
     
  4. nudeyorker

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    I think that it is more difficult for some. I know people who have three children in private school and are paying about $35K per year per child and live in the lap of luxury and life has not changed one bit for them.

    I know other people who made a decision to have only one child and are struggling with the decision and also making ends meet.
     
  5. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    A lot depends on what one's definition of a "reasonable lifestyle" is. What would you suggest is an alternative to the current model?
     
  6. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    I would argue the modern "family model" was always unsustainable - as unsustainable and pyramid scheme-esque as the pension models from the same period - perhaps we will see a return to the intergenerational family model that was the norm prior to the mid-20th Century.
     
  7. B_chinagirl4u2

    B_chinagirl4u2 New Member

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    I think it depends on how much $ you have, where you live and which "family model" you have.

    I do agree the "nuclear" family model is under alot of strain though.
     
  8. Drifterwood

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    Nothing flashy, just normal for the area in which you live. But the problem is that even this leads to debt without the addition of kids and perhaps the loss of some household income.

    I don't know much about other countries and my knowledge of the UK is probably limited as well. I just see the additional financial strain that families bear and then a 50% + incidence of divorce that compounds the costs.

    Childcare needs to be tax deductable at all levels including education. I don't care if more kids go to private schools and have private healthcare even, it takes the pressure off other resources with no loss of revenue. In fact it would create jobs.

    I think that higher education should be free. I see young people coming out with debt to the extent that the average age of a first time home buyer in the UK is now 39. Normal people can't afford the average home, so how can they afford an average family? House prices need to come down to customary multiples of income.

    My old record is that I do not think that marriage should be a property contract. This is biblical and it doesn't work. It's also the only legal contract that I can think of that does not have break clauses. The whole thing has become so unpopular that in the UK, over half of steady live together partnerships are not married. This means that a split is handled as a civil matter and only includes costs of support and perhaps the family home.

    Don't get me wrong, divorce rules hit women just as much if they happen to be the wealthier partner for whatever reason. The point is that a failed marriage can hurt immensely on a financial front and this makes it unattractive for people. The stats speak for themselves.

    The divorce industry is worth Billion$ and Billion$, and the cost impacts the broken family. A simple civil contract not based on property would simplify the process of splitting, make it less expensive and therefore support the family ironically perhaps. Sorry, but if lawyers make less money, I don't care.
     
    #8 Drifterwood, Nov 11, 2011
    Last edited: Nov 11, 2011
  9. B_chinagirl4u2

    B_chinagirl4u2 New Member

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    deb
    There lies the problem
     
  10. Redwyvre

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    A reasonable lifestyle implies living with a reasonable level of debt. Things haven't really changed. Going into debt, getting married, having kids are choices. some folks are better at making intelligent choices. Some folks are not. Likewise there will always be rich people and there will always be poor people. The current crisis will sort itelf out. In the past I've heard people who couldn't pay their bills were thrown into prison, sent away to a 'colony', maybe even sacrificed to the gods....
    Families will continue to be the primary way to raise kids. I don't see any viable alternative. Raising kids takes work, having a long term relationship takes work, being employed takes work. It comes down to making choices.
    Sustainability is the opposite of gambling IMO and the current economic crisis is a gambling problem running it's course.
    BTW if someone has a CDL and can put up with living in North Dakota he/she could make about $120,000.00/year working in the oil fields. Oh yeah he/she would have to live in a trailer and of course work for an oil company. Trade-offs they are always part of the deal.
     
  11. Drifterwood

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  12. Bbucko

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    In my world, it does not exist; but I don't live in the mainstream, either.

    I find it both oddly comforting and rather curious that, after an almost forty year break, my septuagenarian parents have not only reunited but are attempting to sew us all back together, too. It feels so completely unnatural to me now and here, yet beseechingly reassuring at the same (weird) time.

    I can always count on you to get straight to the heart of any discussion, can't I?
     
  13. B_Nia88

    B_Nia88 New Member

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    I plan to live in the traditional family like my parents, aunts and uncles, cousins, grand parents etc. I was was raised in the traditional lifestyle and it is right for me.
     
  14. helgaleena

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    There is a spectrum of 'areas in which you live' represented here on this board alone. So the 'reasonable' lifestyle is going to vary too.

    As the recent documentary 'The One Percent' mentioned, some people think they can't live a proper life without $50 million. I have raised my kids pretty reasonably on poverty level US, under $10 thousand. But then I am not a shopper,I'm a recycler. My ex had to force me to get my first new auto by shaming me for years. So I made him buy it.
    I live in a tin can surrounded by other tin cans where three bedrooms are typically dormitories for mom'n'dad, boy children, and girl children, in large numbers because they are immigrants who do not believe in the same high maintenance for children as the media does. I spent some time growing up in a scenario like that, with cousins, when my nuclear family splintered.

    However, I am on the Internet like you palmpilot and Andoid bluetooth yuppies, haha, when I don't have a cell. The one gov't issued is for my sonny with the disability, for safety.
     
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