Is this safe?

Discussion in 'The Healthy Penis' started by Slamdunk_dude, Jul 5, 2006.

  1. Slamdunk_dude

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    Hey guys this may seem like a stupid question. I had sex with a new partner for the first time recently and it was also my first time having sex without using a condom. I get tested after every partner and she assured me that she does too (and I believe her) I guess that the whole "always wear a condom" thing has been so ingrained in me that I'm being paranoid. But if we are both clean then and she is on birth control then there shouldn't be a problem right?

    Thanks,

    Slamdunk_Dude
     
  2. Snozzle

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    Do you know about the incubation period for HIV? i.e., how long it takes after infection before HIV shows up in the tests.
    How often do you change partners? How often does she / did she before she met you?
    Do you know what SHE knows about the incubation period?
    There may be other risks. Before you do this I recommend you go in for counselling about all the issues, together, so that you both know what the other knows.
     
  3. Slamdunk_dude

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    Hey,

    I know that it can take up to 6 months for HIv to show in tests after the initial infection. I don't believe that should be a problem as neither of us are very promiscuous and I believe that her last partner was more than 6 months ago. However, it is a very good idea for us to go and be tested and have counseling together, thanks for the suggestion.

    Slamdunk_Dude
     
  4. B_Krueger

    B_Krueger New Member

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    Umm, you know you can still get pregnant on the pill, right? And odd timing for me to read this too, because my cousin's wife just DID.
     
  5. carter2006

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    Can I just say that if you had these doubts, you shouldn't have had unprotected sex in the first place. Its a big decision to make. I don't want to have a dig at you, but if you were in doubt, why not ask this question before doing the deed?

    As for your question, imho no sex is ever going to be 100% safe, but its all about the level of trust and connection you feel with your partner. Enjoy yourself but remember to look after yourself.
     
  6. DC_DEEP

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    When my partner and I figured out that we would most likely be together "as long as we both shall live," we decided that at some point, this would be an issue. So we got tested, at three-month intervals, for a full year. And we got tested together, and (after insisting that we didn't care that it was against policy) got results together. It was not that we didn't trust each other, but we agreed that it was probably the most healthy way, physically and emotionally, for us to proceed. Trust is not infallible - and even for "good girls" and "clean-cut guys", HIV is only one of many that can come back to haunt you if you don't do things the right way.

    I commend you for sharing your story, and for your concern over not just your own health, but the health of others.
     
  7. B_Spladle

    B_Spladle New Member

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    fwiw, I haven't used condoms in about a year, and I am pretty sure I will never use them again.

    :heart:
     
  8. vinny_spiruccino

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    Figured out we were a big ol bottom boy did we?
     
  9. B_Spladle

    B_Spladle New Member

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    Yes, that's it.

    :tongue:
     
  10. vinny_spiruccino

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    So then WHEN oh when do I get a shot? There was a time when we were going to make porn together, you do recall...
     
  11. B_Spladle

    B_Spladle New Member

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    I do. In fact I still masturbate to the thought of it on a fairly regular basis.
     
  12. DC_DEEP

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    ???Not even when you and your partner do 3-ways??? Well, alrighty then.....
     
  13. B_Spladle

    B_Spladle New Member

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    FYP
     
  14. baseball99

    baseball99 New Member

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    Ok my goal is not to scare you but just to put information out there that a lot of people are not completely 100% on
    First, safe sex is not 100%. Condoms obviously reduce pregnancy and they are somewhere between 80-95% effective when used properly however most people dont use them properly or consitently which is why the range is pretty high.
    The pill is usually a combination of estrogen and progesterone. These hormones are cleared in the liver. If she takes any medication (certain antibiotics) that increase the clearance of the drug it is not nearly as effective. The pill is about 98% effective
    HIV takes about 3 weeks for antibodies to be able to be detected by ELISA and Western Blot.....however, can take up to 6 months or longer for the antibodies to appear. If you are trully concerned after roughly 3 weeks you can ask the doctor to run PCR for the viral DNA but its very expensive and they'll prob tell you to wait for ELISA unless it was seriously high risk. I cant remember the exact percentage but a significant number of people who are HIV infected do not know.
    Syphilis, Herpes, and Chancroid will be symptomatic in males. Syphilis causes a painless ulcer and Herpes and chancroid are painful
    HPV, Gonorrhea and Chlamydia can be asymptomatic in males but a male is able to pass it to a female and HPV has been linked to cervical cancer, gonorrhea and chlamydia to pelvic inflammatory disease which can cause infertility. Gonorhhea and chlamydia can also cause epididymitis and discharge. Gonorrhea is also able to cause a form of septic arthritis

    So more than likely youre freaking out. HIV exposure can also take several exposures but it also can happen after just 1 exposure. Males are not infected as easily as females in heterosexual sex bc there is less mucosa exposed. Dude, if you're really freaking out, go get tested after 3 weeks and you can take a breather if all is well. At 3 months get tested again to be sure and if youre still freaking out get it again at 6 months.....be safe man
     
  15. Matthew

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    ... but does not prevent any sexually transmitted diseases. I know that's obvious to most of us, but you never know ...
     
  16. Heather LouAnna

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    I'm sure you'll be fine, duder.
     
  17. baseball99

    baseball99 New Member

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    good point.....i figured its obvious but there are still people who think the rhythm method or pull out methods work
     
  18. DC_DEEP

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    I'm acronym-impaired. Help me out here....
     
  19. Slamdunk_dude

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    Hey guys,

    Thanks for all the advice. I spoke to my partner about this and we both decided to go and get tested together. It has been over 6 months since her last partner and she was tested a few weeks after that. It has been over 6 months for me also.

    So, theoretically, if we both come back negative then there shouldn't be a problem? (except in the extremely rare cases where the body takes more than 9 months to produce antibodies to combat HIV)

    I will of course continue to get tested throughout the course of our relationship

    Slamdunk_Dude
     
  20. Matthew

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    Correct. You do have to have confidence that the other person is not having any other risks (sex outside your relationship). And it may very well be true in your case, but remember that, sadly, people do lie to their partners all the time about that sort of thing.

    * FYP = "fixed your post"
     
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