Is Your Introduction Sometimes Preceeded By

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Elijah_MorganWood, Aug 19, 2005.

  1. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    I have a really good friend my S.O. and I are going to see soon in NYC. He often introduces me as "....you know, my gorgeous friend with the huge penis". For the record, I've never done anything with him sexually and he's never seen me naked, he used to ask my dates how big I was after commenting on my bulge. He's asked to see it before and I told him "no". Talk about uncomfortable/icky. So I haven't seen my friend in a while and he'll probably do it again. My partner is also hung and very shy and he's said "when those two have sex, it must be like PORN!".

    Anyone else have this experience? Since I've gotten to know his friends better, they look at my face more.
     
  2. DC_DEEP

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    Have you ever actually told him this bothers you? Sometimes, you just gotta go for the direct approach. When you go visit him this time, you should tell him, first thing, that it is unacceptable behavior. Let him know, without any doubt, that you will not tolerate it. During the next introduction, if he pulls the same stunt, simply cut him off, say "I have told you that is inappropriate." and walk away. Maybe he will get the point. Sounds like, other than having no manners or couth when making introductions, he is a good friend. It is worth working out this small (?) detail.
     
  3. Dr Rock

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    who lives in the east 'neath the willow tree? Sex
    what a weirdo. if I were you I'd kick him to the kerb, but if he has some inexplicable redeeming feature then DC DEEP's advice is probably sound.
     
  4. Steve26

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    You're very forgiving to still regard this person as a "really good friend" ... if it were me, I think I'd have trouble remaining close with someone who had such a bizarre fixation on the size of my dick, and whose hang-up caused him to behave in such strikingly inappropriate ways. Fer cryin out loud, even to introduce you as "gorgeous" (your word) is tacky, since you're standing right there in front of them and they can make their own judgment about how you look. I've certainly had friends who've been aware of (and even interested in) my size but they've always shown way more tact and consideration than that.

    Steve :happy:
     
  5. Alley Blue

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    I got to agree. That would kinda piss me off, if I'm introduced to a bunch of strangers as "my buddy with the big dick". I can visualize the whole group looking at my crotch simultaneously.

    Does it really bother you, or are you flattered by the attention ( e.g. : Do you take a bow after the introduction :p )
     
  6. B_DoubleMeatWhopper

    B_DoubleMeatWhopper New Member

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    My 'really good friends' are not that gauche. Friends of mine have been known to mention it up in a bar situation after they've drunk a few, but never when completely sober and never in a polite social setting. I'd very quickly tell him to knock it off.
     
  7. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    I love the fact that you used the word "gauche" in a sentence.

    I'm no shrinking violet. He's done it about 5 times in 10 years of friendship and fortunately never to a group of people so only a couple looked at my crotch. I immediately reprimanded him. I think he has penis envy: i.e. he's small and wishes he was larger. He would then tell me "I'd love to have a big dick and look like you for a day". I told him "I'd love to have your artistic talent for a day".
     
  8. CUBE

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    he wants you..on some level..and is just flattering (and proud) of you
     
  9. steve319

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    If it makes you cringe, tell him to please stop, Sorcerer. It makes me cringe all the way over here.

    Plus, if you think this is indicative of him having some odd, inappropriate social behaviors, maybe it's your duty to help him understand that it's not socially acceptable.

    "Here's my friend, the big cock."

    "Don't treat my like a piece of meat! I'm more than my penis!" (sobbing)

    (synecdoche?) ;)
     
  10. KidBrown

    KidBrown New Member

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    Yeah, this guy sounds like he has some issues with himself for sure. To be honest, and this may sound a little extreme, the best way to cure the problem might be for you to call him out in public the next time he does it. For example, if you're in a bar and he makes the comment again, just say "hey man, stop saying that, it pisses me off".....people tend to calm down once someone has embarassed them in a public setting. The downside to doing that is that he may get upset at you for going about things in this fashion. Have you asked him not to make comments in private already though? Most times if you ask someone that you're friends with to seriously cut something out, they'll usually oblige.

    My ex was notorious for pulling similar shit because we're still good friends. She thought she was being cool when she would say in public "oh, he's got a big dick" but it put me in a bad situation because a) I'm not actually that big, just above average and b) That sort of comment is not what I want to have said when I'm introduced to a girl, it's akin to a guy saying "oh, she's gives really good head" in my book. It's simply not appropriate, and it's frankly pretty disgusting.
     
  11. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    I've voiced my disgust before. He does it less and less...we live 5000 miles apart so we see each other maybe once a year. I think in his mind it's a compliment. He says I'm not the most approachable person in the world...and then he tells me he doesn't mean anything by it and he loves me...ugh. If it wasn't for his ever present VERY sensitive partner, I'd turn to his friends and say "This is my friend and he's sucked off over 3000 guys in men's rooms in 15 different states". I had a friend a few years ago that used to introduce me as "....my gay friend". I would turn right around and say "This is my friend Kristy and she needs huge cocks". She knocked it off after a few of those. As for my friend, I miss the fucker and haven't seen him in ages. I'll think up some really nasty barbs on the plane in case he does it again. As I said before, I'm no shrinking violet.
     
  12. KidBrown

    KidBrown New Member

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    Ha ha, I bet that girl never made the "this is my gay friend" comment again after that sort of response. So yeah, looks like you at least have a plan, hopefully it won't happen again.
     
  13. bigtwin

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    Similar experience....My brother used to introduce me to his gfs as his really hung brother. It embarrased the hell out of me. I asked him to stop, argued with him about it and he'd laugh and say sure, sure but then he'd do it again. It was clear that some didn't get (the joke?) but he assured me that others did. With time and hindsight I came to understand that he probably did it out of insecurity over the situation.
     
  14. goodwood

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    Sorcerer -

    Hey. Yes. Actually I have had this sort of thing before. When it first started I was a bit alarmed but after enough times of this happening and the stares from newly introduced people, ah - I just forget about it. If this friend of yours is a great friend then perhaps you could be like "Knock it off already" or if not, then just do not pay any attention, smile, play along, go with the flow and water off a duck's back. That always seems to work the best for me at this point. A recent gf took me to a party where an ex bf of her's was. She took me (besides the fact people together do these things) with the stated intention of making this guy jealous. He seemed to have been informed and her mission was accomplished. Kind of fun.
    Anyway - if it's too much of an unwanted problem then just don't go see this friend.
    However, there are many more and far worse introductions one could be given. Would you prefer "Hey - this is Source. He has a micro penis. He is an ass wipe. He's a forty year old virgin"? I would not like any of the above intros.
    G.W.
     
  15. BruceSter

    BruceSter New Member

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    Now, I don't see anything "disgusting" in his behavior. Okay, he might not be running for the subtility, or decency awards, but I can imagine worse things than him dropping hints about your endowment. In fact, I know this situation from my l/f who also likes to drop the one or other comment when facing another female, especially when she's given the usual age gap talk - it's her way to settle the bill, though she does it in a more subtle way, innuendo, but nonetheless open.

    Being labeled hung I'd certainly call one of the minor problems.

    Bruce
     
  16. B_Hung Muscle

    B_Hung Muscle New Member

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    I'm with the Brucester on this. It sounds like he's a little envious or proud. Being called hung and gorgeous -- hmmmmmm, not the worst things I've ever been called.

    If it bothers you, tell him in a nice way and move on. I wouldn't trash the friendship over something like this...
     
  17. Knight

    Knight New Member

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    I can see how it's annoying and embarrassing. But the more people that know, the more that will be interested ;)

    I've never been introduced as being hung but it's been said in public, and strangely someone I'd never met somehow knew I was hung...there wasn't even time to look at my crotch and she was stood far away. Then she came over and told me...that was weird, I can only think that she saw me from this site...

    Anyway, it is a kinda tricky situation but not all bad. You probably get some action from it but then of course you have to wonder what kind of people that attention is going to attract. I agree that it's also probably down to insecurity.
     
  18. txquis

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    I've known several people who announce size, even to strangers.
    Yipes.
    Cant say i like that too much.
     
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