It still hurts!

B_Spladle

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 14, 2005
Posts
3,159
Media
0
Likes
10
Points
183
Age
37
Location
Dallas, Texas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
inkubus963 said:
I kind of alluded to my worst date in one of my first posts. Over dinner on a blind date he blurts out. "I can't wait 'til later, I've heard how big you guys are." We had been getting along pretty well up 'til then, although I hadn't considered sex on the first date as an option. If that wasn't bad enough, his ex comes into the restaurant on a date with Young Twink Clone #1487, and winds up at the next table. The rest of dinner was filled with barbs back and forth between the two of them as to who scored a better date. I think I was in the lead as first prize due to my alledged size, but when my excruciating migraine sudden flared up, it cut the evening short....
Wow. I sincerely hope that he never got a chance to see it. Tell me I'm right. Please.
 

B_Spladle

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 14, 2005
Posts
3,159
Media
0
Likes
10
Points
183
Age
37
Location
Dallas, Texas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
GoneA said:
just two years ago (when i was twenty), i was dating a very pretty girl; however, her comeliness was not at all an indication of her level of intellect, as she was very much a simpleton.

at any rate, i put up with this lame-brained behavior (which she had no reservations about publicly displaying) for roughly a year. the straw that broke the camel back was this exchange we had one night at a restaurant:

Me: "actually julianne, i like my steak medium-rare."
Julianne: [pauses for a moment with a rather quizzical look on her face] "...so would it be silly to ask what large or small-rare is?"

Me: [gently touches her cheek] “sweetheart, let’s get the check…”


i haven’t seen her since ... she may have fallen into a hole.
Just for the record, this is evidence of ignorance as opposed to stupidity.
 

GoneA

Sexy Member
Joined
Sep 12, 2005
Posts
5,020
Media
0
Likes
37
Points
268
Spladle said:
Just for the record, this is evidence of ignorance as opposed to stupidity.

oh, ignorance may be evident in this one particular story (as opposed to stupidity); however, she was no stranger to the latter.
 

Honey_Grrrl83

Sexy Member
Joined
Mar 29, 2006
Posts
449
Media
0
Likes
25
Points
163
Age
40
Location
On the banks of the Mississippi
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
WOW,these are some pretty bizarre stories,I have one more to add to the mix,this one happened the night of my senior prom,and it all went down like this:

I graduated from high school in 2001 and at the time I was dating this really hot guy,he was a jock,he played on the football team as a wide receiver,I was obviously still a virgin at the time but if things would've went differently that night who knows?:rolleyes: Anyway,after the prom we piled into a limo and went to a hotel,he had a rented a suite there and we were(possibly) going to indulge in some "adult activities":tongue: Once inside the room we popped the cork on a bottle of champagne,had a few too many drinks and started to make out,things started getting frisky and he asked to be excused for a moment,I said okay and he went into the bathroom.
I had removed my dress and was lying in bed,wearing a bra and panties,when HE emerged from the bathroom(guess what)HE had on a lovely pink bra and panties,I totally freaked,I slipped my dress on again and ran out of that hotel room,I comandeered the limo and went home:scared2: It turned out he had a fetish for dainty women's underwear
 

D_alex8

Member
Joined
Dec 15, 2005
Posts
8,055
Media
0
Likes
1,297
Points
208
Location
Germany
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
Honey_Grrrl83 said:
I graduated from high school in 2001 and at the time I was dating this really hot guy,he was a jock,he played on the football team as a wide receiver,I was obviously still a virgin at the time but if things would've went differently that night who knows?:rolleyes: Anyway,after the prom we piled into a limo and went to a hotel,he had a rented a suite there and we were(possibly) going to indulge in some "adult activities":tongue: Once inside the room we popped the cork on a bottle of champagne,had a few too many drinks and started to make out,things started getting frisky and he asked to be excused for a moment,I said okay and he went into the bathroom.
I had removed my dress and was lying in bed,wearing a bra and panties,when HE emerged from the bathroom(guess what)HE had on a lovely pink bra and panties,I totally freaked,I slipped my dress on again and ran out of that hotel room,I comandeered the limo and went home:scared2: It turned out he had a fetish for dainty women's underwear

*sigh*... I actually find this story quite a turn-on rather than a tale of disaster. :rolleyes:
 

Ethyl

Legendary Member
Joined
Apr 5, 2006
Posts
5,194
Media
19
Likes
1,707
Points
333
Location
Philadelphia (Pennsylvania, United States)
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
HoneyGrrl . . . what a riot! That's my fav, so far.

Once upon a time, I was at a club and a very nice looking gentleman came over and bought me a drink. We talked for about an hour before the conversation became somewhat disturbing, right about when he said:

"Oh, by the way, i'm an angel"

I thought he was trying to be cute, of course. "Really? Is that what your mother tells you?"

"No, i'm serious. I'm really an angel. God sent me here to observe what's going on in the world today and give him a report".

I just stared at him, waiting for laughter. None came. He proceeded to go into great detail about his "job" and for the first time in my life, I felt frightened and amused at the same time. After another ten minutes of this drivel, I said:

"There's something I need to tell you".

He smiles. "Oh yeah, what's that?"

"I'm an angel, too".

He looks perplexed. "You are?"

"Yes. God sent me here to check up on you. By the way, you're doing a really shitty job. Just so you know, he's not going to be happy." I slid off the stool and left.
 

Gisella

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Posts
4,822
Media
0
Likes
114
Points
193
Location
USA
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
Honey_Grrrl83 said:
WOW,these are some pretty bizarre stories,I have one more to add to the mix,this one happened the night of my senior prom,and it all went down like this:

I graduated from high school in 2001 and at the time I was dating this really hot guy,he was a jock,he played on the football team as a wide receiver,I was obviously still a virgin at the time but if things would've went differently that night who knows?:rolleyes: Anyway,after the prom we piled into a limo and went to a hotel,he had a rented a suite there and we were(possibly) going to indulge in some "adult activities":tongue: Once inside the room we popped the cork on a bottle of champagne,had a few too many drinks and started to make out,things started getting frisky and he asked to be excused for a moment,I said okay and he went into the bathroom.
I had removed my dress and was lying in bed,wearing a bra and panties,when HE emerged from the bathroom(guess what)HE had on a lovely pink bra and panties,I totally freaked,I slipped my dress on again and ran out of that hotel room,I comandeered the limo and went home:scared2: It turned out he had a fetish for dainty women's underwear

hehehehehe...

Honey what a nightmare !!!:eek: :biggrin1:

oh man...terrible!!!
 

KoolKat

Sexy Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2004
Posts
124
Media
8
Likes
25
Points
248
Age
36
Location
Hobart Town (Tasmania, Australia)
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
HoneyGrrl . . . what a riot! That's my fav, so far.

Once upon a time, I was at a club and a very nice looking gentleman came over and bought me a drink. We talked for about an hour before the conversation became somewhat disturbing, right about when he said:

"Oh, by the way, i'm an angel"

I thought he was trying to be cute, of course. "Really? Is that what your mother tells you?"

"No, i'm serious. I'm really an angel. God sent me here to observe what's going on in the world today and give him a report".

I just stared at him, waiting for laughter. None came. He proceeded to go into great detail about his "job" and for the first time in my life, I felt frightened and amused at the same time. After another ten minutes of this drivel, I said:

"There's something I need to tell you".

He smiles. "Oh yeah, what's that?"

"I'm an angel, too".

He looks perplexed. "You are?"

"Yes. God sent me here to check up on you. By the way, you're doing a really shitty job. Just so you know, he's not going to be happy." I slid off the stool and left.

HAHAHA

U are my new favourite person mercurialbliss, what a great line. There is this weird guy at uni that goes on about being an angel, and that he can travel the world like astral projection but through computer cables, and he was sitting there in all serriousnes talking, i couldnt help but laugh, but maybe we shouldnt, haha, maybe there are angels who can navigete computer cables around.
 

inkubus963

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 6, 2006
Posts
258
Media
0
Likes
23
Points
238
Location
Galesburg (Illinois, United States)
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Honey_Grrrl83 said:
I still can't get that vision out of my head,it's shocking to see a buff,masculine football player in ladies underwear:wtf2: But the more I think about it now the funnier it is:biggrin1:

Honey_Grrrl83, did you happen to catch Jose Canseco in Surreal Life? He wore lots of women's lingerie, and makeup in one of the episodes.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

Legendary Member
Joined
Aug 9, 2003
Posts
41,064
Media
0
Likes
41,243
Points
718
Location
New Jersey, USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I've had my fair share of them and then some. The one that sticks out in my mind was my Best friend set me up on a blind date with one of his then gf's best friends at a pub'ngrill in my area.

Now, I give you, she had some looks to her when i 1st met her, I said some.

But it turned out that during the meal she revealed that she wasn't really interested in me at all. As a matter of fact she said she was waiting on her so bf to get out of the county lockup soon, and that this was only a passing of the time. In fact, about the only thing she might've considered was as she put it- was "entertainment" for about an hr at her place. Plus she said that my type really didn't appeal to her, that is to say, she heard through the gf that set this up that I was not so endowed. Makes me wonder how the other knew that at all.

So I took that last verbal knee jerk in stride, and excused myself to go to the men's room. I didn't even need to piss at that time, and walked straight over to the coat checker , grabbed mine and cut out.

I had already paid the price of a blind date gone down the crapper, let her pay the price for everything else.
 

AlteredEgo

Mythical Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2006
Posts
19,176
Media
37
Likes
26,249
Points
368
Location
Hello (Sud-Ouest, Burkina Faso)
Sexuality
No Response
GoneA said:

Me: "actually julianne, i like my steak medium-rare."
Julianne: [pauses for a moment with a rather quizzical look on her face] "...so would it be silly to ask what large or small-rare is?"


This reminds me of a high school acquaintance of mine, who a few years ago was set up on a blind date. It was a double date. Basically, he had to go out with some girl's friend, so our buddy John could go out with that girl. So. He can't leave, because John's date is going well. His girl however was as sharp as hot spaghetti. Boredom (and cruelty) set in, and he began to play with her. At one point he says to her, "Look! A diversion!" She turns to see!

My worst date was a couple of years ago, and in a roundabout way, is how I got here. I like internet dating. I was on OkCupid for a while, where I met some really cool, nerdy, good-looking, funny guys. I went on quite a few really good dates that led to more dating, or at least more booty-calling. I was really into this one guy, let's call him J. He was very intelligent, and so full of life and adventure! He went running with the bulls! He backpacked his way south through Europe for two months. He hopped a ferry to (was it Egypt?) Africa. He'd worked for Bloomberg and survived for a few years. He was working on a master's in something I found fascinating at the time. He made me laugh until I hurt days later. Oh he was so funny. We began to spend hours and hours on the phone, laughing the entire time, developing our own private jokes, building a romance. One thing was clear: neither of us was looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Just a new friend to have regular sex with. Maybe something else later, depending on the strength of the friendship itself. The friendship was going well. J and I were really bonding. We decided to have a date. Something fun, romantic, to be followed by rough sex.

So we meet up in Brooklyn to start with a walk by the water, and to check out a fair that was happening on the promenade. Well. He wasn't as attractive as his photos. Not at all. At all. He was much heavier in person, and his photos (I think deliberately) hid a huge bald spot he could have mentioned. However, he still had the same friendly eyes which had been the biggest appeal of his photos anyway. They were dark blue, very clear, curious, friendly, approachable and beautiful. Plus, like I said, we'd really bonded. I was extremely attracted to J, just not so much physically. As they say though, the mind is the most important sexual organ. And my mind was hooked.

When we got back to his apartment, it was a mess. Why would you invite someone over if it's a wreck? Easy. It's always a wreck. The bathroom was dirty. He needed to wash his dishes. The bed was made though. We sat on the floor amid the piles of papers and played video games. We went back to the couch and kissed. it was awful, but many first kisses are, right? So I kissed him again. Still awful. Bad sign. It just kept getting worse and worse. Physically painful at times, and then I see his dick.

Now, he'd already told me weeks before that he did not eat pussy. I had been willing to make a rare exception for him, so turned on by his mind was I. But that statement comes with expectations. And those expectations were not met.

2.5" very, very hard. And shaped like a pyramid. I put him to sleep the only way I know how and bailed.
 

Gisella

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Posts
4,822
Media
0
Likes
114
Points
193
Location
USA
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK said:
I've had my fair share of them and then some. The one that sticks out in my mind was my Best friend set me up on a blind date with one of his then gf's best friends at a pub'ngrill in my area.

Now, I give you, she had some looks to her when i 1st met her, I said some.

But it turned out that during the meal she revealed that she wasn't really interested in me at all. As a matter of fact she said she was waiting on her so bf to get out of the county lockup soon, and that this was only a passing of the time. In fact, about the only thing she might've considered was as she put it- was "entertainment" for about an hr at her place. Plus she said that my type really didn't appeal to her, that is to say, she heard through the gf that set this up that I was not so endowed. Makes me wonder how the other knew that at all.

So I took that last verbal knee jerk in stride, and excused myself to go to the men's room. I didn't even need to piss at that time, and walked straight over to the coat checker , grabbed mine and cut out.

I had already paid the price of a blind date gone down the crapper, let her price everything else.

Yeh, let the jerk pay the bill !

Well done Massive :tongue: :wink: