- Joined
- Jul 2, 2009
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- 90% Straight, 10% Gay
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- Male
When I walk into a bar, people are excited. Why? Because my penis is awesome. Quite simply, it is stunning. I am a man of impeccable taste, unprecedented fashion, and sophisticated wit but that is far overshadowed by my mighty penis.
Now I know what all you fellow LPSG'ers may be thinking. Dirk2d, it must be a great feeling to walk into a room and get eye fucked (HARD!) by every single girl there, as well as half the guys for the matter. And to answer your question, yes it rocks!
But sometimes at night when im laying in bed with a 10/10 under my arm, Barry White softly playing in the background, a 9/10 making me a sandwich, and the 8/10 washing my car, I sometimes think to myself, all this attention is great, but do these broads cleaning my house while I regain my strength from the freaky orgy that has just occurred like me for me and my views on current world politics, my boyish charm and unrivalled break dance skills? Or do they only want me for my perfectly sculpted, Michaelangelo's David of a penis?
Does anyone have any idea what it feels like to be sitting in a restaurant and having strange women pointing at you while asking the waiter "Is that English sausage on the menu?"
Now I am a humble man, but do you think any women will ever be able to see past the unbridled physical beauty and awesomeness that is my penis for the real me? :frown1: sigh.
(Oh, and to the thread/post Nazis doing the rounds and jumping down everyone's throats lately, not one part of this post is serious so put away your stakes and work on that sense of humour)
Dirk2D, he so funny. Should write "stand up" comedy. What you think?
