It's Shallow to Always Decline any Sexual Contact with Someone Who is HIV+?

[Devken]

YES, Devken, it IS my right to have sex.

You don't even know what you're saying... because damn, you think you are entitled to sex. Society must provide you with sex... and if someone doesn't want to have sex with you for whatever reason, that person is a horrible person.

I don't think you know just how eerily close to pro-rape you sound when you think you are entitled to have sex regardless of what others want.

Maybe you're just not that smart and you don't know the difference between entitlement and having a right.

And no: it is NOT your right to stigmatise me further.

Because you are in no way telling people who don't want to have sex with you that they are morally inferior to you... oh wait, that is exactly what you are doing.

I'm not stigmatizing you, I'm pointing out that your logic is flawed and you are arguing from an extremely egocentric point of view, because you are unaccepting of people who refuse to have sex with you for reasons they feel are valid enough. I'm not stigmatizing you, you are, by painting yourself as a horrible parody of a person.

Besides, sounds like you'd be a dud root and impersonal. That was fun in my 20s, but now: meh. Rather something more meaningful. Your fear comes from zero understanding. Ever rooted anyone? Then YOU may have been infected. Think about it. It could be YOU.

What the hell is rooting. If it means to have anal sex without a condom, I haven't had that. I'm also educated on the transmission of HIV and after having all the facts laid out in front of me, I've decided to not have sex without a condom, or have sex with someone who is HIV positive.

Actually, maybe you are HIV+ and you don't know.

I get tested regularly, so I know I'm negative, and as I said before, I know the risks, hence I've never had anal sex without a condom, and to my knowledge, I've never had sex with someone who has HIV. I tend to be careful to reduce the risks.

I survived the shock of my positive diagnosis. Don't run to me if you get HIV. Oh, and if you fuck anyone it's entirely possible that you could.

This whole outburst of yours, playing up a strawman and try for some personal attack and shock-tactics, really isn't going to work in any kind of serious debate.

You've presented a case where you feel you are entitled to have sex with people regardless of their desires. The world must follow your feelings, you are somehow more important than the physical and moral integrity of others who have made their choices. You do yourself a disservice and I endorse you to never utter any of this outside of this forum, it will quickly leave you without any sort of allies and you will only work to make people more intolerant of you, because you've shown a complete lack of respect for other people, making demands of them that you are in no position to make.

You can have sex, but you cannot force people to have sex with you. That is called rape.

 

[pwrdick]

I am HIV+ and only have sex with other HIV+ guys. I don't fully trust condoms and think I'd have difficulty fucking anyone who was HIV-. So I disclose my status and ask the status of any potential partner. If they're negative, I politely & discretely decline and explain why, and almost every guy understands and accepts my position. I don't personally see a problem with someone HIV- deciding that they want to avoid sex with someone they know is HIV+. Their challenge will always be not really knowing if the person they think is HIV- is REALLY HIV-. Fortunately for me, I think very few people would lie about being HIV+ when they aren't.

 

[Popyuu]

This is a tricky conversation to have from the start so could you all stop talking about rape? Cause that has nothing to do with the topic at hand. Or at least in my opinion. No one is forcing themselves on anyone (i hope) so thats no where near the topic. So yeah please.

As for the basic topic. Well i don't think it's shallow. Yet i doubt any other word would fit as a description. Shallow implies that there wasn't much thought put into the decision when that has been proven wrong with this very thread. Most i'd say is that a person may be lacking information on how to have 100% protected sex with someone that has either HIV or AIDS. Even then i'd say that it'd be a much better/useful idea to get information out there on how to do so rather than having a pissing match.

This topic is not be any account disgusting. I don't even know why it went that route. If anything it has the potential to clear up people's ideas on it. The only thing disgusting about it is the name calling bullshit and people turning into full blown children when talking about an adult topic.

Edit: Fuck it. After having read previous posts, this thread was pretty much off the rails anyway. Well i'm out.

 

[Pandora77]

The Moderators would like to remind everyone to post in a more respectful manner.

Pandora77
On behalf of the Moderating Team

 

[conor]

YES, Devken, it IS my right to have sex.

The only right anyone has to sex, is with oneself - no-one has the right to sex with anyone else without their permission/consent. You have a serious chip on your shoulder - here is a news-flash: the World and its wife owe you nothing. Get off the moral high ground, and stop acting as if anyone who refuses you sex, is stigmatising you. That old chestnut has become rather passé. Have you ever considered that someone may simply just not be attracted to you? Probably not.

 

[blazblue]

Questioning, criticizing, and critiquing one's choices doesn't equate into entitlement. More than likely he wouldn't have sex with any of you either.

 

[matt19cm]

The Undetectable Elephant

 

[matt19cm]

Truvada Whores Are Everywhere

 

[Cowboy_Jake]

Wow!! Having just read this thread, it is something else. It seems that some people have really short fuses and others get way off the point of the thread.

In answer to the original question, no I do not think it is shallow to decline sexual contact with someone who is HIV positive.

Before I get a lot of hate responses, let me say that I refuse to have sex with people for a lot of very shallow reasons. Just so someone doesn't automatically try to tag me as a racist or some other hateful tag, let me make clear that none of my reasons have anything to do with race, color, religion, national origin, age, sex, or veteran status. Well, maybe age sometimes (shallow reason).

 

[auspoz]

Ok. So, by saying "I'm human, I happen to have become HIV positive, and I'm worthy of a sex life", I seem in some warped minds to have become a rapist. Hmm.

How utterly disgusting. I will NOT be counselling this guy or any others like him when something goes wrong, and they find out they're positive.

Go on enjoying your "neg, UB2" hookups. You wouldn't have any idea of their status. None whatsoever. Do you inspect their blood results as they enter your boudoir?

I know what's worse than honesty: wilful ignorance and judgement.

 

[K.Dst]

The Undetectable Elephant

" Yet, many on the conservative side of the debate who reluctantly accept the validity of PrEP completely refuse to accept the legitimacy of treatment for HIV positive people as a viable form of prevention"

WTF?
It's almost exactly the same, only applied to the people who truly need it the most.
+ it has given much more statistically relevant data on it's efficacy, more than PreP does, and better results than the constant use of condoms (so let's not even talk about the "efficacity" of sero-sorting).

How can you admit that a truvada pill a day is safe when given to a neg and refuse to admit that it is safe when given to a pos?

 

[auspoz]

Honey, they'll say anything to do 2 things: 1) make themselves feel safer and superior, and 2) make any positive people feel like reckless barebacking sluts unworthy of any notice.

And I'm so fucking over the judgement, I'm done. Let the ignoramuses spread their stigma. One day, a few of them will become poz, and my well of compassion will not extend to them.

(watch as they descend upon me. A sexual being, but accused of being a rapist)

 

[Chriskenney81]

Positive people are still people. Someone's status wont preclude friendship or a possible sexual relationship. Just have to be careful...which you should be anyway. If you contract HIV, it's not the death sentence it used to be.

Only thing I dont understand is the guys who purposely go out and contract HIV. I do not get the thinking there.

 

[Cowboy_Jake]

Positive people are still people. Someone's status wont preclude friendship or a possible sexual relationship. Just have to be careful...which you should be anyway. If you contract HIV, it's not the death sentence it used to be.

Only thing I dont understand is the guys who purposely go out and contract HIV. I do not get the thinking there.

I agree with your post except for your last sentence. I don't think anyone purposely goes out to contract HIV. I think they fail to take what cautions are available to reduce the risk of contraction . That may be what you were trying to say.

There have been documented cases of men with a positive HIV status intentionally trying to infect others, but that is extremely rare (i.e. the dentist in Florida). I consider those men as being emotionally unstable. :banghead:

But you still missed the original question that started this thread. Shallow or not shallow to decline sex with an HIV+ person?

 

[Chriskenney81]

I agree with your post except for your last sentence. I don't think anyone purposely goes out to contract HIV. I think they fail to take what cautions are available to reduce the risk of contraction . That may be what you were trying to say.

There have been documented cases of men with a positive HIV status intentionally trying to infect others, but that is extremely rare (i.e. the dentist in Florida). I consider those men as being emotionally unstable. :banghead:

But you still missed the original question that started this thread. Shallow or not shallow to decline sex with an HIV+ person?

It would be shallow to decline sex just because the potential partner is HIV positive.

 

[balkaneuro]

Some of you need your head examined.

If someone has HIV, it is my right to deny them sex and that is no way discrimination.

Now that doesn't mean that I believe people with HIV are sick people, or irresponsible, or sex maniacs. But they have a serious disease, and it is in my right to protect myself to not get that disease as well.

 

[DadDic]

shallow?yeah its a person youre meeting but as with everything truth is all.how you chose to protect your own health is your choice.friendship even close friendship is one issue sex is another,the younger people Ive seen advertising on CL& such deeing to be converted hiv statuswise?no its no longer a death senrance with tri therapy but its still a communicable disease,undetectable?to whom&each persons response to sex with a pos person would be different,I wish pos people the best&most wonderful life,just be honest about whaat youve contracted&tell a possible partner all you can.herpes hiv hate vodka or drugs,its all about communication.POS guy who met his husband on here,sure you were very honest about everything ,its the basis of a good relationship

 

[TexanStar]

It would be shallow to decline sex just because the potential partner is HIV positive.

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

 

[AlteredEgo]

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

LOL

 

[andii]

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

Seriously.