It's taking me longer to reach orgasm

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by ConstantComment, Oct 31, 2010.

  1. ConstantComment

    ConstantComment New Member

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    I'm really concerned about this. And yes, I am one those people who was masturbating in the absence of a partner. I am careful to masturbate now only in the middle of the week as my guy and I agreed we would only have sleep overs on the weekend.

    He's very patient with me. But I am not with myself. Anyway to get back a woman's mojo? Btw, I am 50, premenopausal as I still get regular periods, night sweats but no heat flashes ---in case that makes a difference.

    Maybe someone knows a thing or two about my problem.
     
  2. bid6555

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    Your question is likely beyond the scope of LPSG, but it is either physical or mental. When did the problem start? Any triggers going on at that time. Is your guy doing things the right way? How do you feel? Stuff like that.

    WR
     
  3. hsarge

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    Regular masturbation could desensitize you clit, and cause a need for more stimulation. Additionally, you may have become tuned to your masturbation method in order to climax. Nothing say you can't help yourself 'along' while your partner is attending to you. Your the one who knows your body best.
     
  4. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Would definitely check for high blood pressure. IIRC, about two years ago, one longtime female member posted about a similar issue with delayed orgasm or anorgasmia and later found it was due to untreated high blood pressure.

    :rolleyes:
     
  5. ManlyBanisters

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    What is this 'regular masturbation could desensitize your clit' bollocks?

    That's a fucking urban myth, propagated by men (and some women who can't get over hang ups that masturbation is dirty but don't consider that a good enough excuse not to do it any more now they are grown up, enlightened, sexual goddesses :rolleyes:).

    How do you even know she masturbates with clit stimulation as the main 'feature'?
     
  6. hsarge

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    Sorry! I am not against pleasure. I hope everyone has their fill. Sometimes we get locked into a particular way. I wish you peace, love, and pleasure, okay?
     
  7. gunnaknow

    gunnaknow New Member

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    You could try The Orgasmic Diet. High dose fish oil is the main key to the diet, along with the use of a kegel device. I've found that high dose fish oil makes me extremely sensitive and climax alot sooner. I'm a man, so I don't want to climax so soon but it would be good for women. I found that fish oil that was higher in DHA than EPA, like cod liver oil, had much more of an effect than regular fish oil. Here's the whole diet below, with a note added by me. If you ever want to buy the book, it's called The Orgasmic Diet, by Marrena Lindberg.

     
    #7 gunnaknow, Nov 1, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2010
  8. mexdude

    mexdude New Member

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    "premenopausal" im not a doctor, but ive heard from doctors in tv (not the best reliable i know) that when that part of the women starts, hormones may get off balance, and u may need to go to ur medic so u get profesional treatment
     
  9. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    I am actually going to give the opposite advice to this. I find that the more I play, the hornier I get, and the faster I orgasm. So I suggest playing more often!

    And of course, check out the pre-menopausal thing with your doc.
     
  10. RawDog

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    Using fingers or a vibe? Clit or blended vag/clit masturbation? I know how ManlyBanisters feels, but what do you say to the argument that vibrators de-sensitizes the nerve endings to the clit? (For the record I agree with MB)
     
  11. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    Oh, I'm a vibe girl all the way! And it's blended, but I try not to let the clit win because I prefer vaginal orgasms.

    And I think MB is spot on. No desensitisation happening here.
     
  12. RawDog

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    Ok, this "...but I try not to let the clit win because I prefer vaginal orgasms." has been bugging me for a bit. How common is this with other women? I feel this question needs it's own thread, but at the same time, this may be beneficial to the original post on this thread. :confused:
     
  13. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    For a bit of clarification, I can only get one orgasm (two if I'm really lucky) a time when I'm playing with toys. Weird really because I'm multi-orgasmic with humans. I prefer vaginal over clitoral orgasms, so I try to make sure I'm getting my preferred one.

    I'm guessing it may be a little different for those who can have more than 1.
     
    #13 B_subgirrl, Nov 2, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2010
  14. petite

    petite New Member

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    I don't believe I've ever had a vaginal orgasm. It's all clitoral for me. When I orgasm from PIV sex, it's from secondary stimulation of my clitoris through tugging on my labia (i believe) or from more direct stimulation through contact with his pelvic area, either by rubbing my pubis mont against him while thrusting or grinding myself against him.
     
  15. Enid

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    I like both clitoral and vaginal orgasms, but I don't know if subgirl has a point with it possibly being because of the ability to have multiples. Maybe she's right.
     
    #15 Enid, Nov 2, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2010
  16. TheScotsman

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    Whatever the issue is, I'd try not to focus all your thoughts on your problem since any worry or stress over it is only really going to magnify it. Stress does all sorts of crazy shit to the body, though I'm not saying that's necessarily the cause but it could well be a byproduct that's not helping.

    The mind's a crazy thing.
     
  17. ConstantComment

    ConstantComment New Member

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    Thanks for all your thoughts. I give some of the advice a try. But people can continue commenting.
     
  18. mexdude

    mexdude New Member

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    Maybe trying with new toys :)
     
  19. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    When I am really stressed, it's just about impossible for me to climax. It stresses me more that my hubby worries lover it. Try not to worry much over it and maybe move into a new "playful" plan with some toys, pretty things, and you guy. Best wishes.
     
  20. petite

    petite New Member

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    You aren't on any antidepressants are you? When I was on one it took me progressively longer and longer to orgasm and then I lost the ability entirely.

    If you are on one, don't make the horrible mistake I made and stop it cold turkey. I experienced SSRI discontinuation syndrome, which is a nice "non-druggy" sounding term they invented for "withdrawal symptoms" from stopping use of a mind altering drug, which is literally what antidepressants are. I experienced suicidal thoughts that were extremely intense for about a week and if I had not known that I was just experiencing a severe dopamine crash that was causing it and that I would no longer feel the same way in a few weeks, I might have taken my life, because that's how intolerable it felt to be alive.
     
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