Job Opening

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by GoneA, Dec 14, 2005.

  1. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks,interviews and testing were done there were 3 finalists. Two men and a woman.


    For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.


    "We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter
    what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!!!"

    "The man said, "You can't be serious, I could never shoot my wife"

    The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job.

    Take your wife and go home."



    The second man was given the same instructions. He took the
    gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."

    The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

    Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same
    instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room.

    Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.

    After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, She wiped the sweat from her brow.

    "This gun is loaded with blanks" she said.

    "I had to beat him to death with the chair."



    MORAL : Women are evil

    Don't mess with them !!!!!!!
     
  2. B_Danceswithlamps

    B_Danceswithlamps New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2005
    Messages:
    554
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Traveling!
    Real Moral: Don't buy expensive furniture!
     
  3. rawbone8

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Messages:
    2,864
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    the suspense is killin' me.... did she get the job????
     
  4. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    she's in this thread ... ask her.
     
  5. Matthew

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    8,374
    Likes Received:
    161
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    California
    Nice font.
     
  6. B_Danceswithlamps

    B_Danceswithlamps New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2005
    Messages:
    554
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Traveling!
    No, I'm sorry. she didn't. Actually, they were going to give it to her, until she tripped an lost her face. As it turns out, it was really Osama trying to get into Government files. Aparently, they stole his Playboys when they raded the Taliban's palace/building/whatever! :D
     
  7. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    nice tits.
     
  8. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2002
    Messages:
    83,922
    Likes Received:
    34
    She got the job.
    She has nice tits.
     
  9. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    coincidence?
     
  10. well_endowed

    well_endowed New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2005
    Messages:
    83
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Why do people ruin perfectly good jokes by tagging unfunny morals on the end?
     
  11. B_Danceswithlamps

    B_Danceswithlamps New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2005
    Messages:
    554
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Traveling!
    But you see, it is funny. There will always be a mean moral, this one is just really apparent. I still think it's funny, even with the moral.:D :p
     
  12. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    you would have to ask the person who came up with the joke...
     
  13. rawbone8

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Messages:
    2,864
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    I prefer the unadulterated GoneA

    the joke rocked :D
     
  14. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1

    thank you.

    i prefer the unadulterated gonea, too - he's just never around. thus, you guys are stuck with me.
     
  15. Matthew

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    8,374
    Likes Received:
    161
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    California
    Can you be unadulterated once you've committed adultery?
     
  16. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    i believe the real question is: do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
     
  17. rawbone8

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Messages:
    2,864
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    they enjoy infancy for only so long, then grow out of it

    adults on the other hand....
     
  18. DC_DEEP

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2005
    Messages:
    9,029
    Likes Received:
    12
    You got something against mean tits?
     
  19. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    considering most of the people i've encountered - i beg to differ.
     
  20. GoneA

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2005
    Messages:
    5,176
    Likes Received:
    1
    wouldn't you?
     
Draft saved Draft deleted