Just a quick quiz...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by IntoxicatingToxin, Aug 16, 2007.

  1. IntoxicatingToxin

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    I thought this was interesting. It's in this months "O" Magazine.
    Schema Therapy: Abandonment

    It's basically a test to see what "schema" in your childhood has helped to create your personal relationships and what your "schema" may be. I'm not going to give you scores on everything because the whole thing isn't necessarily relevent. But... my two most likely "schema" are abandonement and entitlement.

    Abandonement - People who cling to others because they're afraid of being left and don't feel important relationships will last. They're usually attracted to partners who cannot be there in a committed way.

    Entitlement - Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.

    So... how did you score??
     
  2. BigDuder

    BigDuder New Member

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    Emotional Deprivation
    Most of the time, these patients haven't had someone to nurture them, to care deeply about everything that happens to them or someone who was tuned in to their true feelings and needs.

    Entitlement
    Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.


    this quiz has saddened me
     
  3. SpoiledPrincess

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    I got eight things that apply to me, but I don't believe the quiz has any true value because there weren't any positive models as the end results,

    Emotional Deprivation: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Entitlement: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Abandonment: 8
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Defectiveness: 4
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Subjugation: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Unrelenting Standards: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Self-Sacrifice: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
     
  4. simcha

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    Mistrust/Abuse: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you
    Mistrust/Abuse
    Those who feel that they cannot let their guard down in the presence of other people, or else that person will intentionally hurt them. If someone acts nicely toward them, they assume that he/she must be after something.

    Entitlement: 12
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you
    Entitlement
    Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.

    Unrelenting Standards: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
    Unrelenting Standards
    An individual who must be the best at most of what they do and feel there is constant pressure to achieve and get things done. Their relationships suffer because they push themselves so hard.

    Emotional Deprivation: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
    Emotional Deprivation
    Most of the time, these patients haven't had someone to nurture them, to care deeply about everything that happens to them or someone who was tuned in to their true feelings and needs.

    Look, most of us have received some damage along the way. We all have things from which we need to heal. It's all about how we carry what we have learned from our past forward, and what we can do to repair and learn from our past.

    I'm not shocked that Mistrust/Abuse and Entitlement both came up high for me. I'm quite aware of my own history and how it affects me in my relationships today. What's most important about this is what I'm doing about it to change how I react to others with whom I am in relationship. To a certain extent, because of my experiences, I'll always approach others with a bit of suspicion as to their intentions. And I'll always have some sort of anti-authoritarian bent. Will I always let it get in the way of being able to have a fulfilling life and intimate relationships? I'm constantly working on myself so that I won't.
     
  5. ManlyBanisters

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    A few lows - and 2 mediums that look, to me, a little contradictory. No 'high' scores - does this mean that I'm well adjusted - I doubt it.
    I agree with Princess - no positive models suggests a bad evaluation method to me too.

    Entitlement: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
    Entitlement
    Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.

    Self-Sacrifice: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
    Self Sacrifice
    Someone who puts others' needs before their own, or else they feel guilty, and usually end up taking care of the people they're close to
     
  6. Principessa

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    I only read half the article in "O" before falling asleep last night. Glad the online quiz was so quick and easy. For me I think it's pretty much spot on; but then again I know my diagnosis.

    Emotional Deprivation: 14
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Entitlement: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
    They don't call me Princess IRL for nothing! :tongue: :biggrin1:

    Abandonment: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you
    This one should be higher. After my half-sister died my mom went through a phase where she couldn't care for me and her mother came to live with us . . . for 3.5 years! My abandonment issues go back to my 1st birthday which is the day my half sister died.:frown1:

    Defectiveness: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
    You'd feel defective too if all your relatives made you feel like the good sister died. . . :mad:

    Subjugation: 18
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
    Is this why I like to be submissive sexually?:flirt:

    Unrelenting Standards: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
    Daddy was a drill seargeant during Korea & mom has OCD. If it had been possible I probably would have scored 25 on this one.

    Mistrust/Abuse: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
    When the people who are supposed to protect you from abuse don't or fail miserably in their attempt one learns to be mistrustful.

    Self-Sacrifice: 16
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas
     
  7. IntoxicatingToxin

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    I'm glad to see that some people participated! I was thinking that this wouldn't get a lot of reponses, if any at all. Thanks! :biggrin:
     
  8. Belly_Dancer

    Belly_Dancer Member

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    Very interesting...these were my results:

    Emotional Deprivation: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Entitlement: 10
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you

    Abandonment: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Defectiveness: 10
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you

    Subjugation: 14
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Unrelenting Standards: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you

    Mistrust/Abuse: 10
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you

    Self-Sacrifice: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you
     
  9. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    All of the results were low for me except for Self Sacrifice (12).
     
  10. wispandex_bulge

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    What's Your Schema?
    [​IMG]


    Emotional Deprivation: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Entitlement: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Abandonment: 5
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Defectiveness: 8
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Subjugation: 16
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Unrelenting Standards: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Self-Sacrifice: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    You know...this tells me that I like to please others and do well but am not relaly bothered by much else...kinda makes me the perfect mate don you think? Calling all eligible gay men!
     
  11. LongTimeComing

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    Nice to see that I truly am as f'd up as I thought. Validation is always good.


    Emotional Deprivation: 18
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Entitlement: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you

    Abandonment: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Defectiveness: 14
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Subjugation: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Unrelenting Standards: 12
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you

    Mistrust/Abuse: 5
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Self-Sacrifice: 8
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you
     
  12. Not_Punny

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    Let ME tell you about abandonment.... my parents wrapped me up in a blanket and dropped me off at an orphanage on my 32nd birthday...

    * sob *


    (just kidding) :biggrin1:
     
  13. D_Egloshayle Churchkey

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    Emotional Deprivation: 14
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Entitlement: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Abandonment: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you

    Defectiveness: 16
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Subjugation: 14
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Unrelenting Standards: 8
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Mistrust/Abuse: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Self-Sacrifice: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    In schema therapy, some combinations feed into each other, constantly triggering tensions within the relationship. Young calls these the worst matches:

    It is true I`m often depressed, god damnit :(
     
  14. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Emotional Deprivation: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Entitlement: 18
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Abandonment: 18
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Defectiveness: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Subjugation: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you


    Unrelenting Standards: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 17
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    Self-Sacrifice: 18
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas


    In schema therapy, some combinations feed into each other, constantly triggering tensions within the relationship. Young calls these the worst matches:


    • <LI class=issueli>Abandonment and Subjugation <LI class=issueli>Unrelenting Standards and Approval Seeking <LI class=issueli>Self-Sacrifice and Entitlement <LI class=issueli>Defectiveness and Punitiveness <LI class=issueli>Subjugation and Enmeshment
    • Emotional Deprivation and Emotional Inhibition
    I'm not surprised in the least.
     
  15. viking1

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    This is fascinating. I can't believe that so many here got results similar to mine. I scored pretty high on most, and very high on some.

    It looks like a lot of us here could relate to each other a lot more that what we do. Maybe we just don't want to...
     
  16. OmahaBeef

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    Gender:
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    Emotional Deprivation: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you

    Entitlement: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Abandonment: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Defectiveness: 4
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Subjugation: 8
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you

    Unrelenting Standards: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Mistrust/Abuse: 15
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    Self-Sacrifice: 16
    Very high; this is likely one of your core schemas

    In schema therapy, some combinations feed into each other, constantly triggering tensions within the relationship. Young calls these the worst matches:

    • Abandonment and Subjugation
    • Unrelenting Standards and Approval Seeking
    • Self-Sacrifice and Entitlement
    • Defectiveness and Punitiveness
    • Subjugation and Enmeshment
    • Emotional Deprivation and Emotional Inhibition
    ...I have no idea what this means...but thats what I scored...

    ...OB
     
  17. arliss

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    Emotional Deprivation: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Entitlement: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Abandonment: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Defectiveness: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Subjugation: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Unrelenting Standards: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Self-Sacrifice: 4
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you
     
  18. Principessa

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    It means of the people who posted scores you and SpoiledPrincess are the most balanced and least in need of therapy.

    Or maybe some of us relate and converse as best we can at a given time. Sometimes verbal comunication is too much for me and I retreat into the world of chat, IM; e-mail.
     
  19. B_josiah852

    B_josiah852 New Member

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    Emotional Deprivation: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Entitlement: 13
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you


    Abandonment: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Defectiveness: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Subjugation: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Unrelenting Standards: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 10
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Self-Sacrifice: 12
    High; this schema is probably very significant to you
     
  20. Act2_Begins_Now

    Act2_Begins_Now New Member

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    Emotional Deprivation: 11
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Entitlement: 6
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Abandonment: 5
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Defectiveness: 3
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Subjugation: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Unrelenting Standards: 9
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    Mistrust/Abuse: 7
    Low; this schema probably does not apply to you


    Self-Sacrifice: 10
    Medium; this schema may have some relevance to you


    In schema therapy, some combinations feed into each other, constantly triggering tensions within the relationship. Young calls these the worst matches:

    Abandonment and Subjugation
    Unrelenting Standards and Approval Seeking
    Self-Sacrifice and Entitlement
    Defectiveness and Punitiveness
    Subjugation and Enmeshment
    Emotional Deprivation and Emotional Inhibition

    Abandonment
    People who cling to others because they're afraid of being left and don't feel important relationships will last. They're usually attracted to partners who cannot be there in a committed way.

    Emotional Deprivation
    Most of the time, these patients haven't had someone to nurture them, to care deeply about everything that happens to them or someone who was tuned in to their true feelings and needs.

    Entitlement
    Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.

    Subjugation
    In relationships, these people let the other person have the upper hand and worry a lot about pleasing other people so they won't be rejected.

    Unrelenting Standards
    An individual who must be the best at most of what they do and feel there is constant pressure to achieve and get things done. Their relationships suffer because they push themselves so hard.

    Mistrust/Abuse
    Those who feel that they cannot let their guard down in the presence of other people, or else that person will intentionally hurt them. If someone acts nicely toward them, they assume that he/she must be after something.

    Self Sacrifice
    Someone who puts others' needs before their own, or else they feel guilty, and usually end up taking care of the people they're close to.

    Social Isolation
    Individuals who don't think that they relate well to other people and/or feel that they don't fit in with any sort of group.

    Dependence
    People who often feel helpless or aren't capable of making a decision without the aid of another person.

    Vulnerability to Harm or Illness
    Hypochondriacs and/or those who consistently fear that they will be involved in a catastrophe like an airplane crash or hurricane.

    Enmeshment
    Young's patients who have a weak sense of personal identity and habitually cling to or "mesh" with other people do so in order to feel like a complete person.

    Failure
    Someone who believes they will never succeed or that they're not as bright or talented as the people around them

    Insufficient Self-Control

    Those who lack self-discipline and want to quit a task at the first sign of frustration or failure. (People with milder forms of this schema will give up personal satisfaction or fulfillment in order to avoid conflict or confrontation; could be described as a slacker.)

    Approval Seeking
    Individuals can place an extreme importance on other people's opinions and sometimes put a high level of significance on appearance and social status as a means to get attention.

    Negativity
    Someone who focuses on the worst parts of life (disappointments, missteps, and embarrassing moments) and might have inflated fears that they will make a mistake that will result in a personal crisis, like financial ruin.

    Inhibition
    People who are afraid to show emotion or, for that matter, initiate conversation&#8212;might be described as a wallflower.

    Punitiveness
    Those that believe even the smallest mistake deserves punishment. Usually hold themselves&#8212;and others&#8212;to very high expectations; find it hard to empathize or forgive mistakes, their own and those of others.
     
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