Just another locker room troll incident

D_Tintagel_Demondong

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Just flaunting what you've got in front of him might have had the desired effect in the short term, but now he can go to management and say YOU were 'threatening' him. He would almost certainly say that if you reported him for his admittedly bad behavior.

I'm more than a little confused, though, by everyone's seeming 'lust' for how this "turns out." Like some of us want "more" to this story. Should it be moved to fictitious stories? Are we getting off on humiliating said troll?

I highly doubt he'd complain to the management after getting his wet dream fulfilled.

I don't get off on the humiliation. I've had to deal with lockerroom stalkers myself and it's not easy. What musclebare9 did was an approach that I've never heard of before, so I'd like to know the outcome... not a "lust."

I don't mind the looks -- if I did then I'd avoid the locker rooms alltogether. Catching some nervous guy staring can be a slight thrill and I don't mind that. I just don't like being stalked and I tend to get very angry at these people. I don't know if they are socially inept, stupid, uninhibited, or just hoping to get a positive reaction while making it obvious that they want you.
 

musclebare9

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Dudepiston

This has happened before. The first time I left the gym because it was definitely a case of stalking. The second time I got in the guys face and left him know he was going to get hurt. He left the gym or has done very well at avoiding me. I go to the gym to work out not make out. I don't need doughboy following me around close enough to lick the sweat off of my ass. He could report me but it would be difficult to prove that I offended him. I simply changed my clothes and bumped into him. Sexual harrassment has to be repeated and obvious. It's his word against mine right now. Other people have seen how he acts towards me so I could easily have witnesses support my side.

If you want to believe it's fictitious, that's your choice. You can come up with some psychological BS about my childhood and how I was deprived of attention while at my mother's breast that leads me to seek fulfillment in a fantasy world.

Once in a while it's nice to see the good guy win. There are consequences to being a troll.
 

NCbear

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I can't help being both amused and impressed by your response to the troll, musclebare.

He got into your personal space and crossed some lines, and then you turned the tables on him. VERY funny.

But I wonder whether he'll be the type to be smart enough to understand how and why you turned the tables on him, or whether he'll be the type to take it as a come-on (you know, like the stereotypical egocentric straight male jerk type who thinks every time a woman says "no" it really means "yes").

Maybe a friend or two could observe the troll's behavior as well? Or someone who's fairly neutral, whose word wouldn't be questioned because they're your friend?

NCbear (who is always interested in social dynamics, particularly when people are naked and don't quite know how to handle it maturely)
 

benderten2001

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"What these guys do in the locker room is just plain inappropriate, no doubt...
However, just to give you a little insight, these trolls probably stare because they are very envious and full of self-loathing; they might not even be gay but have a similar behavior because they want to be close to what they feel is unreachable..."

IMO, this is one terrific response and lends great insight into the hidden emotions of others and their behavior around us. I've been around the LPSG for a long time and I could not have expressed this any better myself.
 

MNGuy

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To all the gay/bi guys who are lining up to pat musclebare9's back, you should really check his post history.

I'm sorry (no Im not)..poor musclebear, you adonis. Some ugly (what nerve), sorry guy is lusting after you (boo hoo!). Then you go and 'fluff' yourself and "give him a show".

You beautiful people have such a tough time. (and mind you, I have a big dick, am good looking, but don't inflate my ego to your level.)
 

snoozan

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I'm never really impressed by these locker room troll threads. Invariably it's some hot hung guy (posting about himself, of course) who is being ogled at by a fat old man and the hot hung guy either gets awfully mistreated or wins in the end with his superior looks and troll-fighting skills. Our hero then gets lauded by gay and straight men alike for handling the situation so well. These threads get to be like reading comic books or romance novels after awhile... completely formulaic. Personally I think the OPs only post these stories to reinforce how hot they are and what a great guy they are to boot.

Yawn.
 

EagleCowboy

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To all the gay/bi guys who are lining up to pat musclebare9's back, you should really check his post history.

Well, I did just that. From what I've seen of Musclebare9's posts, the man is secure with himself and his sexuality, knows where he stands, and makes no apologies for it. It is a bitch to get that point. I know because I'm the same way. It does not appear to be gay bashing to me. Just an unwanted stalker. Would you like a morbidly obese woman stalking you in a locker room lusting after your bod??
 

benderten2001

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"... From what I've seen of Musclebare9's posts, the man is secure with himself and his sexuality, knows where he stands, and makes no apologies for it...."

I've just taken about an hour (now) to look up ALL of Musclebare9's posts, and I agree with the above quote.

I can personally relate to much of what Musclebare9 has said about staring and the generally inappropriate behavior of others (i.e. "admirers") . I've found it VERY unsettling sometimes myself in public places. Generally, I suppose I try to avoid such occasions whenever I can, too.

Still, I'm trying to allow for what's behind the actions of others and yes, I'm a bit more willing now (as I get older) to perhaps even allow for some of those reasons to explain what's happening. But. while these intrusive actions of others might be explained somehow, they really cannot always be excused.

One's privacy and personal space, should ALWAYS be respected.
 

MovingForward

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I agree, I went to the gym last night, and when I went to take a shower, I noticed the guy accross from me was playing with himself and had a cockring on. In my mind, it was kind of pathetic. In my mind, he should be working out trying to improve himself instead of staying in the shower all day looking for action. The reason I knew he was there, was I originally went to the shower just to get wet before I swim ( who came up with that rule anyway) and an hour later when I finished my swim, the guy was still there.
 

sdbg

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I'm very liberal, but this lurking in the locker room stuff is lame and totally lacks class. I would want to say somethng snappy if someone were doing it to me. Why can't these guys try their social skills on the workout floor instead of stalking members in the locker room? I'm laid back and keep to myself at the gym, yet I've made friends there too.
 

D_Bartasiah Dingleberrye

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I think it's pretty similar regardless of where you are or what gym you go to. At my current gym, there are ALWAYS guys hanging out in the locker room looking for action. However, there are some dudes that obviously go to the gym to work out and play around a bit when they're done, and there are the dudes that come just to get their eye-candy fix. I've been the subject of a few of the latter types' attention on more than one occasion, and I it does make me feel uncomfortable.
One guy in particular is always a few steps behind me. It's not just that we hit the showers at the same time... he makes sure we hit the sauna at the same time. No matter how many other guys are in there, he sits too close to me. It could be just he and I in there and he'll sit close enough that I can't put my arms at my sides. Obviously, I just cut it short, but am always pissed that I let him get to me.
I think if I tried the muscle's tactic, I'd just make him think I was encouraging his passive-aggressive advances.
 

B_dxjnorto

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I think if I tried the muscle's tactic, I'd just make him think I was encouraging his passive-aggressive advances.
Guys. Even when they're after guys, they act like guys. Especially.

Supposedly only three or four percent of the population is exclusively homosexual. That's a pretty small field. However, about ten percent of men have had a sexual experience of some sort with another male or males. Even if it was just a circle jerk in high school, that six or seven percent window of opportunity can really bring on the aggressive behavior. It's what some women have to put up with on a frequent basis eh? Especially women on the net eh? Eh or meh?
 

Goose_Eggs

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Oh hell, this is going to happen anywhere. I quit my gym membership and started working out in my condo building's workout room, and there is rarely anybody there, but lo and behold I have a guy who regularly now seems to be down there when I am and a maintenance guy who keeps popping in.

I think some people just exude a sexuality and others like to look at that. I have been 'cruised' and trolled by unwanted men in dressingrooms, gyms, even public tiolets for years (I'm 42) and have to honestly say that if I make it clear to them that I'm not interested, it has never been a further problem. There are lots of ways you can do that. But if you honestly do make clear you aren't intestersted chances are the perpetrator, be it a gangly young kid fascinated by a big hairy dick or an overweight old troll looking for a cheap thrill, will go about their business. Sometimes I think the thrill for them is thinking that you don't know they are watching, by just saying something you break the spell and it isn't as thrilling for them.

That's just my take.
 

B_dxjnorto

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I think breaking the spell is good advice. Unreciprocated attention is based in the imagination. Shattering illusions is empathetic when you think of it. People confuse assertiveness with unpleasantness or aggression.

Everyone looks. I had a few glances at the six foot six muscle dude once I spied him in the checkout line behind me at Lowe's yesterday, but I didn't follow him to his car. You can't help looking.
 

CUBE

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I wouldn't give any attention to someone I wasn't interested in. It is a waste of time. I kind of feel sorry for these guys that troll around because the bottom line is they are lonely. Just ignore it and they will move on.
 

musclebare9

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The troll did not appear last night. He may have changed his schedule, just taken the night off or be on vacation. Whatever the reason, I am happy he wasn't there.

I am amused at some of the responses. One person suggests reading my previous posts. I wish he would have. The post that was referenced included very ugly quotes taken from another person on this site. I have been consistently accepting of others beliefs here at LPSG. I am still not sure of the intention of the post about looking into my previous posts.

Another person believes that this is just some kind of self gratifying romance novel off of the shelf. Although LPSG serves many purposes, it has the intent of being a gathering place for similar people with larger than average penis. This post may be similar to other posts in the past but so have the "I hit bottom", "I got a bulge in my pants, I can't hide" and "I was called horse in school" posts. My experience was posted to share with others what I have been dealing with and how I dealt with it. If that doesn't interest you, please feel free to jump to the next post.
 

Matthew

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Would you like a morbidly obese woman stalking you in a locker room lusting after your bod??

Thanks for that question - it was a good opportunity to think more deeply about this issue which I find distasteful from all sides. Of course what you describe is hard to imagine not only because women are less likely to act like that, but also just because I'm not used to men and women sharing changing areas. But let's just pretend that's commonplace and doesn't make me or anyone uncomfortable in and of itself.

The short answer to your question is no, I don't want anyone stalking me -- in the locker room or out, male or female, "morbidly obese" or with a perfect body. I agree, and hope we can all agree, that stalking is abusive and wrong when anyone does it no matter who they are or what they look like. Right?

To answer the other part your question, it's not that I would "like it," but I would definitely not care if a morbidly obese woman was lusting after my bod in the locker room. Or anyone else, frankly. And I MOST definitely could never, and would never, fluff myself to give her a show of my semi-hard cock in order to keep her away :261: ... not to mention the rest of the luridly erotic parts of this tale.

And that's why it seems like the issue here isn't as much about stalking as it is about revelling in feelings of sexual superiority and righteous disgust at the perpetrator. Why so much focus on how ugly and old the "troll" was? Would it have been acceptable if it was a young hot guy doing this? If it were a woman would it have been OK for her to "stalk"? Don't get me wrong - I do agree that everyone is entitled to their preferences in terms of gender and body type. But I can't help but feel that somehow the thread (and your question) are implying that the perp's behavior would be OK if (s)he were sexy.

Since you asked me about a woman instead, it struck me that maybe you thought a gay man wouldn't be offended by another man following him like this. Trust me, lots of 100% gay men also have complaints about "trolls," and frequently describe being annoyed by situations similar to this one (without the erotic humiliation aspect, of course). But In the end, I can only speak for myself: On the occasions when somebody has gotten out of hand with me in the locker room, stopping it never took more than eye-to-eye contact with some calm, direct and crystal clear words.
 
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snoozan

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Thank you, Matthew, this is one of the most intelligent posts I've read on this subject (and I've read far too many). I think what you say gets to the heart of the issue, which is not simply about unwanted attention.


Thanks for that question - it was a good opportunity to think more deeply about this issue which I find distasteful from all sides. Of course what you describe is hard to imagine not only because women are less likely to act like that, but also just because I'm not used to men and women sharing changing areas. But let's just pretend that's commonplace and doesn't make me or anyone uncomfortable in and of itself.

The short answer to your question is no, I don't want anyone stalking me -- in the locker room or out, male or female, "morbidly obese" or with a perfect body. I agree, and hope we can all agree, that stalking is abusive and wrong when anyone does it no matter who they are or what they look like. Right?

To answer the other part your question, it's not that I would "like it," but I would definitely not care if a morbidly obese woman was lusting after my bod in the locker room. Or anyone else, frankly. And I MOST definitely could never, and would never, fluff myself to give her a show of my semi-hard cock in order to keep her away :261: ... not to mention the rest of the luridly erotic parts of this tale.

And that's why it seems like the issue here isn't as much about stalking as it is about revelling in feelings of sexual superiority and righteous disgust at the perpetrator. Why so much focus on how ugly and old the "troll" was? Would it have been acceptable if it was a young hot guy doing this? If it were a woman would it have been OK for her to "stalk"? Don't get me wrong - I do agree that everyone is entitled to their preferences in terms of gender and body type. But I can't help but feel that somehow the thread (and your question) are implying that the perp's behavior would be OK if (s)he were sexy.

Since you asked me about a woman instead, it struck me that maybe you thought a gay man wouldn't be offended by another man following him like this. Trust me, lots of 100% gay men also have complaints about "trolls," and frequently describe being annoyed by situations similar to this one (without the erotic humiliation aspect, of course). But In the end, I can only speak for myself: On the occasions when somebody has gotten out of hand with me in the locker room, stopping it never took more than eye-to-eye contact with some calm, direct and crystal clear words.
 

B_dxjnorto

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On the occasions when somebody has gotten out of hand with me in the locker room, stopping it never took more than eye-to-eye contact with some calm, direct and crystal clear words.
Great advice. When the eye-rolling and hackle-raising doesn't have the intended effect. Speak.