- Joined
- Jun 11, 2004
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- In Your Darkest Thoughts and Dreams
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- 99% Gay, 1% Straight
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- Lex,
I would like to have a label discussion since the labels permeate a great many of the topics here. We could do into ALL labels (And maybe we will) but I hoped we could talk specifically about labels and sexual orientation.
Some days I want to curl up with my wife or pounce on every woman I see and other days I can barely contain my loins as I work out in the gym and am overwhlemed by the desire to lay on my BF's furry chest and play in his facial hair. Sexuality is so much more fluid that any one label allows, me thinks.
Labels can be so infuriating because often they are static while we, as developing organisms, are not. I have submitted that I am 50% gay and 50% staight in my profile on this forum but rarely do I have days where it feels that balanced. I can call myself "Bi," but that is only as an overall average of my fluid desires, not on a daily basis. I also embrace the term Queer as I think very FEW people are "straight." We , each of us, have idiosyncracies that make us different from the "norm."
IMO--Bisexuality as a label does not define who I like to have sex with. Rather it attempts to characterize my capacity to enter into deep, meaningful, lasting and weathered relationships with both men and women on personal, physical, spiritiual, and emotional levels. Within the context of those relationships, we may have sexual contact or not. If we don't--I am no less connected to those people, as our connection has less to do with penis-vagina-anus contact than with our shared ability to conjoin mentally on a plane of shared existence that we find mutually beneficial, rewarding and comforting. I like to call it Love.
It's almost as if the label is more a way to help SOME people conceptualize me--as if that should matter right? Are labels just the construction of the close-minded? Are they our human attempts to define or compartmentalize? Are the concepts of definition and compartmentalization the same? Not? Binary? Thoughts?
Note: This is really my tranparent attempt to pick Mattness' brain on the issue.
Some days I want to curl up with my wife or pounce on every woman I see and other days I can barely contain my loins as I work out in the gym and am overwhlemed by the desire to lay on my BF's furry chest and play in his facial hair. Sexuality is so much more fluid that any one label allows, me thinks.
Labels can be so infuriating because often they are static while we, as developing organisms, are not. I have submitted that I am 50% gay and 50% staight in my profile on this forum but rarely do I have days where it feels that balanced. I can call myself "Bi," but that is only as an overall average of my fluid desires, not on a daily basis. I also embrace the term Queer as I think very FEW people are "straight." We , each of us, have idiosyncracies that make us different from the "norm."
IMO--Bisexuality as a label does not define who I like to have sex with. Rather it attempts to characterize my capacity to enter into deep, meaningful, lasting and weathered relationships with both men and women on personal, physical, spiritiual, and emotional levels. Within the context of those relationships, we may have sexual contact or not. If we don't--I am no less connected to those people, as our connection has less to do with penis-vagina-anus contact than with our shared ability to conjoin mentally on a plane of shared existence that we find mutually beneficial, rewarding and comforting. I like to call it Love.
It's almost as if the label is more a way to help SOME people conceptualize me--as if that should matter right? Are labels just the construction of the close-minded? Are they our human attempts to define or compartmentalize? Are the concepts of definition and compartmentalization the same? Not? Binary? Thoughts?
Note: This is really my tranparent attempt to pick Mattness' brain on the issue.