Ladies in NYC, ever wanted to mold some clay?

Discussion in 'Large Penis Personal Ads' started by pornographicpoet, Dec 5, 2008.

  1. pornographicpoet

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    25 y/o dude here. I live in Brooklyn. I've NEVER had sex. I've only been blown and jacked off. Looking to get rid of the stigma of being a nerd, once and for all, LOL. I'm a teacher by profession, but I'm looking for a woman who could teach me a few things. I'm a very eager pupil.

    Probably this is the worst site to put this personal up considering you have to admire these bigger guys on the site. I'm 7" x 6".

    Looking for a woman who wants to be friends with benefits.

    A little about me...

    Into sexually: Anal, facials, mutual oral, filthy talk, licking out creampies, snowballing

    Turnons (please respond even if you don't fit into these categories. i was a little unclear originally so i edited it): redheads, short or tall women (5'2 or shorter, or 5'10 or taller)

    Remember, I said FRIENDS with benefits. Likewise, I'd like to have something in common. It doesn't have to be everything. Just some things.

    About Me:

    Pics: See my gallery. I have face/cock pics. I'm very hairy. be forewarned.
    Religion: Pagan
    Occupation: Teacher
    Talent: Poetry
    Favorite Authors/Books: anything by Bukowski, "American Psycho" by Bret Easton Ellis, short stories by Raymond Carver, "Youth in Revolt" series by C.D. Payne, "Please Kill Me" by Legs McNeil
    Favorite Poets: Ginsberg, Sexton, Plath
    Favorite Music: Punk (Art/post-punk, 77 style, anarcho-punk), hip-hop (the rawer the better, and underground shit), and indie rock (whiny white boys and girls) (Some bands: The Dismemberment Plan, Magnapop, Gang of Four, Crass, The Fall, Too Short, Three 6 Mafia, The Breeders)
    Favorite Films: Slacker, Juno, Trainspotting
    Favorite Restaurant: Foodswings (a vegan fast food joint in Williamsburg. I'm vegetarian for health reasons. I don't care about people's eating preferences. i'm not a preacher.)
    Politics: Anarchist (in theory), I voted for Obama in '08.
    Favorite Drinks: Wild Turkey 101, Maker's Mark
    Favorite Beers: Baltika 9, Guinness Extra Stout, Yuengling, Bohemia. If I want to just get wasted I'll drink Colt 45s or Olde English.
    Favorite Bars: Cheap Shots (East Village), Habana Outpost (Fort Greene...their margaritas are to die for.)


    Are you in NYC and want to have some fun with a hedonistic sexually inexperienced nerd? LOL. Send me a message on here.
     
    #1 pornographicpoet, Dec 5, 2008
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2008
  2. pvfd102

    pvfd102 New Member

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    Not surprised you have yet to find the lucky lady! Step up your game kid!
     
  3. nicenycdick

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    I suspect your virgin state would end much sooner if you expanded your options somewhat...
     
  4. MickeyLee

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    Yuengling Black & Tan a lil taste of pure joy.
     
  5. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    I agree, plus, you know, it takes me out of the running. :09:

    Props on liking women over 5'10", Ginsberg (I <3 the Beat generation), Carver, Bukowski (love the poem 'Big Red'), Anarchy and Bohemia... and great that you're giving an overview of your likes and dislikes, but I think you should be more open to meeting someone other than your type. :yup:
     
  6. pornographicpoet

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    PVFD......I've got zero game. that's why i'm in this mess.

    Nice......those are just like +'s not dealmakers. hell, as long as she's breathing and will talk dirty. LOL.

    Mickey....I used to like PBR. Then I went to my friend Mary's 21st in Philly and she had a keg of Yuengling. Y became my new favorite domestic. I prefer the Porter myself.
     
  7. pornographicpoet

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    Sweet.....When you're 25 and a virgin.....you're open to meeting anyone.
     
  8. MickeyLee

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    you have to try Atwater Brewery Vanilla Java Porter.

    ps tall red heads are usually into the booky smarty shy boys.
     
  9. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Hmm, good you are open! :hug:
    I was with a virgin not too long ago, and he was also kind of reserved, but I am not timid, so I didn't let that stop me. :wink:

    Perhaps your ad should focus on someone taking the lead?
    Like an aggressor, which may mean she's kind of bitchy :08:, but appropriately dominant as well? :)
     
  10. pornographicpoet

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    Hmm....where can I find some of that? I live in Bensonhurst. If I go to the local bodega all I find is crap like Miller or Bud or Coors.

    Well, my ex (we met online. she was in sandiego i was in wisconsin at the time) was a 5'6" (average height) redhead and used words like "capricious" and "astute" in everyday conversations. never got the chance with her because i was too immature and broke it off before we met. i think she started commenting in a flirtatious manner in my livejournal because i put a reference to "divine hammer" by the breeders in an entry....."I'll go steady with anyone who enjoys the song divine hammer" - which is the most sexually explicit song i can think of in as sexless a genre as indie rock that's not done by liz phair.
     
  11. pornographicpoet

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    Oh. Let me make clear the only qualification that really counts is that you make the first move and be explicit about it so that there's no room for interpretation.
     
  12. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Oh, I so want to show my Facebook!
    Capricious is how I describe myself and someone wrote an ode to that part of my nature. :biggrin1: ...and you like Liz Phair! :heart:
    I would have offered myself had you mentioned P.J. Harvey. :09:

    If I may suggest, Sugar Cane in Park Slope for some drinks?
    A lot of women, always busy and I've met a few cool people there.


    Woo hoo! :arms:

    ...sounds like you're ready to be schooled in the ways of love, young one.... ripe for a cougar. :wink:

    Good luck! :hug:
     
  13. pornographicpoet

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    Damn. If only I had the superpower of complete prescience. The ex was into PJ Harvey, too.

    Sugar Cane? What's the cross streets? If I'm drinking in the Slope I usually go to Cherry Tree (even though it's a preppy bar.) Hmm.....I don't know about meeting women in bars. Last time I thought a woman was making googly eyes at me, I added her on Facebook the next day and found out she was married. And not in that Facebook joke way, but actual wedding pictures.
     
  14. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Sugar Cane is off the 2/3 at Bergen, on south side of the street, just follow the sound of clinking glasses. :biggrin1: Being from Bensonhurst, you probably take the N/R/Q? So then you would exit at Target/Atlantic City/Pacific Street or Union and 4th, which is closer and walk over.

    There's also lounge/clubs in the city. I recommend Sullivan Room if you like EDM and the Stoned Crow which is by NYU, take the A/C/E to 4th.
     
  15. pornographicpoet

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    As for Liz Phair, what nerdy indie boy isn't obsessed with her?

    Come on, songs like Fuck and Run, Flower, H.W.C. - she's a goddess. (But if I'm not hard, my favorites by her are Polyester bride, Supernova, and Whip-Smart)
     
    #15 pornographicpoet, Dec 5, 2008
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2008
  16. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    I was in high school when Exile in Guyville came out, and it was such a revelation.
    Only other artists I felt had that similar "they get me and my experience" affinity was James Hetfield (Metallica, a group I discovered with Ride the Lightning, years after it came out, as a pre-teen), Hole, Juliana Hatfield, and Belly.

    You have great musical taste!
    That should be something you can use to connect with others.
    Nothing like finding your musical twin. :)
     
  17. pornographicpoet

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    Juliana Hatfield? Wow....you have some really good taste, yourself. I always had a crush on her. Ever since I heard her cover of "Say It Ain't So" and when she prefaced the song by saying, "If you're insane, completely insane like I am"

    Heh. I remember when I was young being impressed by a girl I saw walking on 86th street with Hole hairpins. Courtney did a great cover of "Credit in the Straight World" by the Young Marble Giants. I also really like Olympia and Violet.

    Not familiar with Belly. Isn't that Tanya Donnelly's band?

    I think And Justice for All and Master of Puppets are great. I like some metal like At the Gates, Electric Wizard, Slayer, and old Metallica, but not much. Well unless you count the Melvins as metal. They're the band I dress up as on Dress as Your Favorite Band parties.
     
    #17 pornographicpoet, Dec 5, 2008
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2008
  18. voyeuristic

    voyeuristic New Member

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    Juliana Hatfield is totally hot. PP - I love dorky younger boys with thick glasses and go to NY once or twice a year, but I'm about as far from Jenny Lewis (etc.) as it gets. Good luck though!
     
  19. pornographicpoet

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    Sigh. I think I phrased myself badly in the original post. I should have never put anything about redheads or height.

    The women on this site are incredible. I like a woman who is intelligent and knows what she wants. That's about all the criteria I have. Criteria that are definitely filled by virtually all the women I've encountered here.
     
  20. nicenycdick

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    See! I told you you should have broadened your qualifications!
     
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