Ladies, is there really a such thing as him going too deep?

[Tattooed Goddess]

I've had sex so rough I have bled and torn many times. That's not my idea of fun. I've also been fucked so hard that it popped an ovarian cyst. That was so painful I have no words to describe it. I do prefer harder and faster the more into sex we are. That kind of stretching pain is a hurt so good.

 

[693987]

That sounds awesome/fortunate.
Does hitting the very end with pretty good force feel good, like the posterior fornix?

Based on what the other women have said, it sounds like someone just kicked them in their lady balls. So I guess you drew a good card there.

In the variety of positions I have sex in, it all comes across as pleasure, no matter the angle or how deep my sweetie goes. And it's pretty much all rough/tumble fucking. Then again, I also primarily orgasm from penetration. I use a vibrator for masturbation some on my clit, but as far as anyone else being involved in sexy times, it's penetration that gets me off. Fingering or using a toy on me or actual dick. I've only had an orgasm from oral once, and that was oral + being fingered.

 

[jaap_stam]

When he hit the cervix it was a sharp pain. When he hits the end (vaginal cuff) I have a line of scar tissue from it being sewn shut at that end. It's a thick line of scar tissue and that kind of tissue does not stretch. It puts stress on that area and it feels like if he were to push too hard he could bust it open. I can't explain exactly what it feels like. Clench your teeth together and try to poke through your cheek from the outside with your finger. Push hard....really hard. It's painful like that.

I'm poking myself in the face at the kitchen table trying this out

 

[AlteredEgo]

Too much pressure in certain spots is horrible. That's too deep for whatever angle. At a different angle, the same partner might hit the same spot and I'll like it.

 

[LaFemme]

Yes. There is such a thing as going too deep. It is a sharp pain with each thrust and afterwards feels like menstrual cramping.

Exactly! My ex could be most inconsiderate and there were times I thought I would puke from the pain. The cramping afterwards, even bleeding. It was awful. Hence I think my current preference for average size. I mean, if I fell in love with a large sized guy again, I'd figure it out, but it can really hurt.

 

[zwanzig+x]

If a big cock gives you pain and harm several times and you do not like it, you should change your partner.

If the man can use it, it will be your orgasm heaven, but not the painful hell.

 

[AlteredEgo]

If a big cock gives you pain and harm several times and you do not like it, you should change your partner.

If the man can use it, it will be your orgasm heaven, but not the painful hell.

Yeah... Oh, wait no. Because the universe does not revolve around a penis.

 

[EllieP]

Absolutely there's such a thing as too deep. Sometimes it's a pleasure point, but sometimes not. He can tell when it's not, thankfully. I've teased him that he has about three inches of unused weenie. Sad to see it go to waste, but that's the way it is.

 

[Shackleford]

Yeah... Oh, wait no. Because the universe does not revolve around a penis.

Of course it doesn't revolve around a penis. It revolves around my penis. So much mass in one place creates a gravitational vortex.

 

[zwanzig+x]

Yeah... Oh, wait no. Because the universe does not revolve around a penis.

Sorry, you did not understand the message of my posting.

 

[AlteredEgo]

Sorry, you did not understand the message of my posting.

No, I got it. You don't understand that intercourse is not the most important aspect of relating. Sure, a person can move on from a partner who isn't good in the sack, but what if they leave and don't find someone who is as good a partner in all other aspects of life together? Would it be worth trading out someone whose life philosophy, goals, passions and personality are in tune with oneself just because this one's clumsy with his dick? Maybe. But for many people, the answer is no.

 

[LaFemme]

Of course it doesn't revolve around a penis. It revolves around my penis. So much mass in one place creates a gravitational vortex.

That's why I don't travel to parts unknown! Once I got too close to the border and almost got pulled into the vortex! It took eight huskies and a fat chihuahua to pull me to safety. It was scary!

 

[LeaOrida]

Definitely! I`m a small lady The biggest I´ve had so far reached my belly when he was around 80% in me, another one just was a little painful in some positions,

 

[jaap_stam]

No, I got it. You don't understand that intercourse is not the most important aspect of relating. Sure, a person can move on from a partner who isn't good in the sack, but what if they leave and don't find someone who is as good a partner in all other aspects of life together? Would it be worth trading out someone whose life philosophy, goals, passions and personality are in tune with oneself just because this one's clumsy with his dick? Maybe. But for many people, the answer is no.

To be fair, though, if intercourse is still awkward after that initial honeymoon period, there is often emotional fallout in all of those other aspects. Literally every "dead bedroom" sob story has its origins in "X aspect of sex life was unsatisfying for one or both partners, which resulted in lack of intimacy, building of resentment, and then..."

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

When two bodies are thrusting against one another there is bound to be a thrust or two here and there that is too deep. It happens. When a guy enjoys hurting you like that and you've been explicit not to keep doing it and he shows no concern for being more cautious, then to dump that mother fucker. I've had to do it.

 

[AlteredEgo]

To be fair, though, if intercourse is still awkward after that initial honeymoon period, there is often emotional fallout in all of those other aspects. Literally every "dead bedroom" sob story has its origins in "X aspect of sex life was unsatisfying for one or both partners, which resulted in lack of intimacy, building of resentment, and then..."

Okay, but this...

When two bodies are thrusting against one another there is bound to be a thrust or two here and there that is too deep. It happens. When a guy enjoys hurting you like that and you've been explicit not to keep doing it and he shows no concern for being more cautious, then to dump that mother fucker. I've had to do it.

Makes MUCH more sense than what he wrote.

 

[jaap_stam]

Okay, but this...

Makes MUCH more sense than what he wrote.

She and I are saying the same thing. Even a great romantic relationship becomes non-viable if the sex is bad for one or both parties.

 

[thirteenbyseven]

Absolutely there's such a thing as too deep. Sometimes it's a pleasure point, but sometimes not. He can tell when it's not, thankfully. I've teased him that he has about three inches of unused weenie. Sad to see it go to waste, but that's the way it is.

Ellie, that's why for years my wife has automatically placed her hand at the base and squeezed my joystick. This enables her to control the penetration depth and her squeezing does have the serendipitous effect of making my erections harder.

 

[AlteredEgo]

She and I are saying the same thing. Even a great romantic relationship becomes non-viable if the sex is bad for one or both parties.

I don't disagree with you on this in general, but it's not always a problem. My husband and I are extremely compatible. Extremely. I think he's gay; he's certainly not palpably attracted to me, and we're both seeing other men now. If the sex was just okay, I'd probably keep him. If it was terrible, but he was trying, I'd keep him. Why? Because I can count on him. He has my back in ways I'm not sure anyone else would.

For example, while I was out of the house for two hours yesterday, my grandmother made an improper transfer from her armchair to her bed, which meant she left her walker inaccessible from the bed. Because she wasn't meant to be in bed, there was no bed pad on top of her sheets. While in the bed, she urinated and defecated. The urine soiled the sheets, and the other stuff got on the bkankets. Then she got up, and because she lacked her walker, she fell. Again she toileted on herself, and the carpet, and her bathrobe. When we got home, I needed to treat all of our pets, furniture, carpets, etc for ticks because I'd been out having a stubborn tick removed from my shoulder and had no idea where I'd picked it up. He discovered Grandma on the floor, filthy, and afraid. He didn't even call to me. He picked her up, and by the time I came to check on her, he'd stripped her, the bed, sent her toward the bathroom and had filled the sink with soapy water for me. His only question was whether I preferred him to bathe her, or do her laundry. His immediate assumption was that he should share in this mess with me because he knew I'd found her in even worse condition when I got her out of bed that morning (Poo everywhere! Including in ears!) and would be frustrated that she was all jacked up again.

This story perfectly illustrates several things. We both have the same kind of family values. She's a handful. She's violent, mean, insane from dimensia, and shits all over my house. Would another man make me choose between caring for her and being with him? Could another man afford to have me put my career on hold again to be with her, or would I have to entrust her care to strangers and go back to work? Would another man recognize my physical and emotional exhaustion and just step in? He's gentle with her, even when she's covered in disgusting filth and biting, scratching and kicking him. Would another man hurt her? On days when I can't keep from internalizing the horrible things she says to me, would another man do his best to pick me back up, or would he be sick of me being irrationally upset by the words of a senile old bat? Would another man share my moral stance on euthanasia and assisted suicide? He knows me so well. Would another man know exactly when I need a lovely surprise and provide me with it?

My life is really, really hard right now. The wrong man would only make it harder, no matter how great the sexual connection. If my husband was actually attracted to me, I know I would keep him, even if he was absolutely the worst lay in the world, and I'd do whatever it took to keep him because he's a good man. As it stands, I am leaving him because he's gay, and I figured I'd be better off back on the market while I'm young, healthy, optimistic and pretty, rather than older, sicker, going blind, and angry because he's finally decided he has to be true to himself. Even so, it took me a very long time to make that decision, a decision most of my friends encourage me to un-make. They too would keep a quality man who was sexually unsatisfactory. I would. I really would. But there's a difference between bad sex and complete sexual rejection.

 

[jaap_stam]

Definitely a ton of mutual respect in your relationship with your husband! Caring for an elder in that state can put a huge strain on things. And cheers to both of you for not taking the route of darkness in the stressful times you have.

I agree that there is a difference between outright rejection, and bad sex. But you yourself stated that you planned on leaving your husband because he was gay - and really for a woman who prefers men, a romantic relationship with a man who prefers men isn't viable.

As for your friends who would take a sexually unsatisfactory, quality man...I'm curious about their ages and where they are in life where they would be happy with that as their primary relationship. You can't have romance without the sex. I'm not saying your friends are wrong in that stated preference. I'm just saying that if they're ok with an asexual marriage/relationship, they're not looking for a romantic partner, but a loyal roomate. In which case, what TG and I both said still holds true.

I don't disagree with you on this in general, but it's not always a problem. My husband and I are extremely compatible. Extremely. I think he's gay; he's certainly not palpably attracted to me, and we're both seeing other men now. If the sex was just okay, I'd probably keep him. If it was terrible, but he was trying, I'd keep him. Why? Because I can count on him. He has my back in ways I'm not sure anyone else would.

For example, while I was out of the house for two hours yesterday, my grandmother made an improper transfer from her armchair to her bed, which meant she left her walker inaccessible from the bed. Because she wasn't meant to be in bed, there was no bed pad on top of her sheets. While in the bed, she urinated and defecated. The urine soiled the sheets, and the other stuff got on the bkankets. Then she got up, and because she lacked her walker, she fell. Again she toileted on herself, and the carpet, and her bathrobe. When we got home, I needed to treat all of our pets, furniture, carpets, etc for ticks because I'd been out having a stubborn tick removed from my shoulder and had no idea where I'd picked it up. He discovered Grandma on the floor, filthy, and afraid. He didn't even call to me. He picked her up, and by the time I came to check on her, he'd stripped her, the bed, sent her toward the bathroom and had filled the sink with soapy water for me. His only question was whether I preferred him to bathe her, or do her laundry. His immediate assumption was that he should share in this mess with me because he knew I'd found her in even worse condition when I got her out of bed that morning (Poo everywhere! Including in ears!) and would be frustrated that she was all jacked up again.

This story perfectly illustrates several things. We both have the same kind of family values. She's a handful. She's violent, mean, insane from dimensia, and shits all over my house. Would another man make me choose between caring for her and being with him? Could another man afford to have me put my career on hold again to be with her, or would I have to entrust her care to strangers and go back to work? Would another man recognize my physical and emotional exhaustion and just step in? He's gentle with her, even when she's covered in disgusting filth and biting, scratching and kicking him. Would another man hurt her? On days when I can't keep from internalizing the horrible things she says to me, would another man do his best to pick me back up, or would he be sick of me being irrationally upset by the words of a senile old bat? Would another man share my moral stance on euthanasia and assisted suicide? He knows me so well. Would another man know exactly when I need a lovely surprise and provide me with it?

My life is really, really hard right now. The wrong man would only make it harder, no matter how great the sexual connection. If my husband was actually attracted to me, I know I would keep him, even if he was absolutely the worst lay in the world, and I'd do whatever it took to keep him because he's a good man. As it stands, I am leaving him because he's gay, and I figured I'd be better off back on the market while I'm young, healthy, optimistic and pretty, rather than older, sicker, going blind, and angry because he's finally decided he has to be true to himself. Even so, it took me a very long time to make that decision, a decision most of my friends encourage me to un-make. They too would keep a quality man who was sexually unsatisfactory. I would. I really would. But there's a difference between bad sex and complete sexual rejection.