Ladies: knowing what you know now...

[Catchoftheday]

Wont matter, there's not the remotest chance you would take any notice

 

[dolfette]

pft! i would totally have listened on the violence!

 

[Rubenesque]

I'd send myself 3 words...

Wait for William

 

[voidout]

you need to cunt punch her.

music to my ears. le sigh.

 

[Enid]

oh my gosh the amount of you girls that have suffered sexual abuse makes my heart hurt. for reals.

for me:

what other people think truly doesn't matter

it's ok to be yourself

don't fake it because it just makes it that much easier to dissociate

it's ok to want intimacy

separate and together don't have to be mutually exclusive

fear is paralyzing so get over it because it's not worth it

 

[Kevbo]

I apologize for not checking in on this earlier, I can't always log in to this forum... anyway, some very heartrending stuff here and my sincere condolences to those of you who've gone through these traumatic adolescent/young adult experiences. I wasn't sure what to expect when I asked the question but I'm surprised that it became so intensely personal. I did not wish anyone any pain. I can only hope that anyone who seriously thought about this question got something therapeutic out of it and has moved forward in some useful way.

I applaud and offer whatever support/encouragement I can to those who revealed dark secrets that have probably haunted them for a while. And I guess I'll take this moment to apologize for all the jerks out there who have taken advantage of you in some way. I assure you that we're not all like that, but (this is not an excuse) that first era of hormone-bursts can really upset the judgment and good behavior of both sexes.

Be well...

Kevbo

 

[EllieP]

• Your mother is not just saying that - you are beautiful.
• Your father is right - you do have a good mind.
• Don't settle.
• You are stronger than you ever thought.
• Be flexible but be firm.
• People will respect you even when you tell them no.
• The schoolboys who "hate" you really like you.

 

[Enid]

...what advice would you give your younger self concerning sex, men, and penises, if you had some way of sending a message back in time?

Don't be waylaid by men trying to go without condoms. "But I'm clean, baby." Yeah. No. NO. I'm not trusting your word. And don't you dare try to sneak it in anyway! No means no -- even if I consent to PIV condom sex does not mean I consent to PIV NO condom sex

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

All the idiots who call you a whore/slut/skank are just upset that you control your own sexuality and are not ashamed of the fact that you Enjoy fucking.

They can't stand it. And they don't deserve anything you have to offer.

 

[SurferGirlCA]

You have the right to give or withhold your consent.
You are not obligated to do anything.
Your needs are equally important.

 

[MickeyLee]

The boy is golden. He's gonna love you like beans love franks.

Avoid dudes who cling too hard. It's not depression, it's a personality disorder. Stalkers will continue to stalk. Change your number.

Ya gonna meet this dude in a museum. It's crazy how much ya life is gonna intertwine with his. He's ya platonic soul twin. You two are meant to be.

Ya gonna join a dick site. The things you read are gonna make you dislike most men. It's also gonna make you appreciate the good guys even more. It's a tradeoff. You will keep ya boys even closer.

That same dick site is gonna introduce you to an amazing batch of womangs. You will count them as some of your most valued womang friends.

You will remain pretty fucking gay.

 

[AlteredEgo]

You're right. He's lying about his age. But he's not younger than he says, as you think. He's actually older. Much older. He's 32. He's an ephebophile. He's going to rape you, burglarize your bedroom, kiss you goodbye, then give your phone number to other men. He will escape prosecution.

Press your father. Do not assume he's poor. He's actually well-known, well respected, highly compensated. Demand that he invest resources in your future, and make him introduce you to more opportunities. You know he owes you. What you don't realize is he can provide these things. Also, if you don't listen to me about the other thing, tell your father what happened. Let him help you. Giving your father opportunities to be your Daddy is good for both of you. Don't be stiff and withholding with him. He doesn't know what to do with that. It reminds him of your grandmother. He doesn't know that's just how you are with strangers in the family.

Your passport is expired when that London trip is proposed. Use the expediter. The government will deliver a day late and you'll lose time on your trip.

He's your soulmate, but don't marry him. That's not his purpose in your life. If you do marry him, don't even try befriending his mother. It's not worth it. She never comes around. She breaks your heart repeatedly.

Speaking of mothers, yours is right. All the time. A lot of her opinions are rooted in bias, so that's not what I'm talking about. But regarding anything she says you ought to do, just do it.

When he comes back during your next relationship and asks you to marry him, accept. The one you're committed to is never going to stop cheating on you. He's broken. This one is ready now, and you can be besties and lovers again. If you say no, the sweet thing he says next? It means goodbye. You will lose that friendship forever. He can't just be friends. Or he won't. Either is the same, for you. You will never stop searching for him in other men. None of them measure up.

Leave the widower alone. He's wrong. He's not ready. When you leave him, the pain will be unreal, because when you go, you leave your new family. He's not ready when he comes crawling back either. You'll never miss anyone like you'll miss his son and daughter. The pain will be unfathomable.

Do not reject Chef Jennifer's ridiculously good offer. She's right. Do not go to Boston and get married. Like I said earlier, he is your soulmate, but he can never really be your husband. Stay in NY. Also, buy the house next door to Grandma. It's a fixer upper, but you can make it work. You don't need more distance from home than that, at that time.

You live a life of saying yes a lot. You're going to see a lot of opportunities as a result. You're going to get into trouble too. Worth it.

 

[liquiss]

You will remain pretty fucking gay.

That quote made me laugh. A lot. Lines like that are what brings me back here time and again. There are some truly awesome people that frequent this site, despite all the asshats.

Thanks @MickeyLee, for the laughs.

 

[deleted924715]

You're right. He's lying about his age. But he's not younger than he says, as you think. He's actually older. Much older. He's 32. He's an ephebophile. He's going to rape you, burglarize your bedroom, kiss you goodbye, then give your phone number to other men. He will escape prosecution.

Press your father. Do not assume he's poor. He's actually well-known, well respected, highly compensated. Demand that he invest resources in your future, and make him introduce you to more opportunities. You know he owes you. What you don't realize is he can provide these things. Also, if you don't listen to me about the other thing, tell your father what happened. Let him help you. Giving your father opportunities to be your Daddy is good for both of you. Don't be stiff and withholding with him. He doesn't know what to do with that. It reminds him of your grandmother. He doesn't know that's just how you are with strangers in the family.

Your passport is expired when that London trip is proposed. Use the expediter. The government will deliver a day late and you'll lose time on your trip.

He's your soulmate, but don't marry him. That's not his purpose in your life. If you do marry him, don't even try befriending his mother. It's not worth it. She never comes around. She breaks your heart repeatedly.

Speaking of mothers, yours is right. All the time. A lot of her opinions are rooted in bias, so that's not what I'm talking about. But regarding anything she says you ought to do, just do it.

When he comes back during your next relationship and asks you to marry him, accept. The one you're committed to is never going to stop cheating on you. He's broken. This one is ready now, and you can be besties and lovers again. If you say no, the sweet thing he says next? It means goodbye. You will lose that friendship forever. He can't just be friends. Or he won't. Either is the same, for you. You will never stop searching for him in other men. None of them measure up.

Leave the widower alone. He's wrong. He's not ready. When you leave him, the pain will be unreal, because when you go, you leave your new family. He's not ready when he comes crawling back either. You'll never miss anyone like you'll miss his son and daughter. The pain will be unfathomable.

Do not reject Chef Jennifer's ridiculously good offer. She's right. Do not go to Boston and get married. Like I said earlier, he is your soulmate, but he can never really be your husband. Stay in NY. Also, buy the house next door to Grandma. It's a fixer upper, but you can make it work. You don't need more distance from home than that, at that time.

You live a life of saying yes a lot. You're going to see a lot of opportunities as a result. You're going to get into trouble too. Worth it.

I cannot express how much I adore this

 

[deleted924715]

Get in the car. It's the lesser of two evils.

 

[deleted924715]

You don't suit blonde hair

 

[1365373]

Don't be impressed with social status, local or universal. It is no indication of character.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

You have the right to a home, owned, not a rental.
Even if the husband is scared of roots.

But rootlessness will bring you many joys.
You will have at least three callings. Embrace them.

 

[Davincigirl]

I would say read this everyday and stay away!