Last night...

mephistopheles

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Okay, I'm about to give you guys a little bit of a gush about my night last night... because I can't tell anyone else.

Okay. I'm sitting over at my friend's house(whose name I wont use) and me and him are playing some guitar, I'm showing him some simple chords and whatnot(hes a beginner) and after a while we get a call from my friend's friend(who I will call jamie, thats not her real name though) so anyway, she and her sister(jessica, I'll call her that, though its not her real name) are apparently board, and they wanna hang out with me and my friend.

So, I run some money to my brother and we head over to their house. I'm talking and telling jokes, and they're all roaring. Then one of the girl's friends(I'll call him weirdo, because he listens to the Insane Clown Posse) comes over and we decide to get sit at dennys, and eat... maybe.

So we're sitting their and I'm telling jokes, and making an ass out of my self(because I constantly make myself the butt of the joke... I'm like Sonny and Cher, only without the Cher.) So after a while, I'm getting to know Jessica(who, to me, is just dynamite. Cute face, love her body, and hes got a personality that goes way beyond all that. She's a great girl.) she starts asking for someone to "cuddle" with her... and she kept looking at me, and I know she wanted me to do that cuddling...

Yea, it's turning into a great situation, but there's something you have to realize: Growing up hating people, and being hated by people has kind of left me affectionately inept. So anyway, I climb back onto the booth with her, and I'm feeling like a little dog, and she's a matriarch: she rubbing my head and breathing on the back of my neck, and we're chilling out(BTW, that was one of the only times I didnt feel the need to break for a cigarette.)

So anyway, Ill skip past all the other drama... We got back to Jessica and Jamie's house and we were still chilling out and laughin, but then my friend and jamie went into the back room to look at shit on the computer(or something) and it was just me and jessica... We walking into her room(where I continue to tell jokes, and continues to laugh)

The here comes my friend! Apparently one of his other friends(who is a female) is all depressed and shit, and wants to kill herself(or somethig stupid like that) And he wants to borrow my car. and I wouldnt let him do it. It's a standard(which he doesnt know how to drive) he car is all fucked up(he backed into a telephone pole with his driverside door up, and nearly broke it off) he's a shitty driver(he really is) and I worked long an dhard to pay for my car, and idk if you're a driving instructor! no one drives my car but me.

So we reach a deal, I'll take him to his house, and he'll take his car, and Jessica wil come with me... They tried telling me that jessica and I would be alone(and idk, but I think this was just the opportunity jessica was looking for) So i go for it.

So, we stop and get gas, talking, etc etc and finally we get back to her place. We talk and talk until my friend and jessica's sister come back, then we get a little more comfortable. We're laying down, with the lights off, and she notices I'm shaking(which I constantly do, because I am incredibly thin, and tension so fucking high Michael Jordan couldnt grab it. So she wants to give me a backrub. Also, I was bit nervous, because in my mind, I'm not much of a catch. I'm thin, jittery, and have back acne:(... and I'm really starting to like this girl, and I just dont wanna fuck it up.

So she's rubbing my back, and untying some of the knots, and I feel helpless under this lovely young lady, I'm like putty in her hand. She running her fingers up and down my back, and teasing me. And, generally, I hate people touching me, so this is a new thing(sort of) and so anyway, we move on and start kissing(on and off, "making out" for a while, then snuggling) and seeing as how I have no idea what's going on in my mind I do the only thing I can do to cope... I tell fucking jokes...

Yea... jokes... please, dont feel sorry for me(although I do need all the condolences I can get) So after a while, we're both getting tired(its like 5 am by now) so we turn off and goto sleep. about 40 minutes ago, at 1 pm, jessica's boyfriend shows up(who i met last night before denny's) and I leave.

Okay, so anyway, here's my quandary. Jessica has a boyfriend, and normally I would feel like a jerk for messing around with some other guy's girlfriend, but in this case, to put it blunt, I don't care. Secondly, jessica and jamie are moving to north carolina in 6 months. and finally, I made such a complete ass out of myself(with the jokes) I doubt she'd ever want to try anything again.(even though she more or less laughed her ass off at every joke)

But before her boyfriend got there at 1 she said "we need to hang out more often" and we made a date to goto a kickass rockabilly concert in springfield, and we've decided to expand her horizons on what films she watches, so I wil show her some of my movies(which all kick ass btw)

For once in my life I found someone who makes me not utterly hate the world, who lets me think sometimes a few people aren't fuckheads(most of them still are though)

So anyway, what do you think?

(BTW, I am remember of the old saying: "If she'll do it for you, she'll do it to you"

Any thoughts? Any advice based on past experiences?
 

stretcher74

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Okay, I'm about to give you guys a little bit of a gush about my night last night... because I can't tell anyone else.

Okay. I'm sitting over at my friend's house(whose name I wont use) and me and him are playing some guitar, I'm showing him some simple chords and whatnot(hes a beginner) and after a while we get a call from my friend's friend(who I will call jamie, thats not her real name though) so anyway, she and her sister(jessica, I'll call her that, though its not her real name) are apparently board, and they wanna hang out with me and my friend.

So, I run some money to my brother and we head over to their house. I'm talking and telling jokes, and they're all roaring. Then one of the girl's friends(I'll call him weirdo, because he listens to the Insane Clown Posse) comes over and we decide to get sit at dennys, and eat... maybe.

So we're sitting their and I'm telling jokes, and making an ass out of my self(because I constantly make myself the butt of the joke... I'm like Sonny and Cher, only without the Cher.) So after a while, I'm getting to know Jessica(who, to me, is just dynamite. Cute face, love her body, and hes got a personality that goes way beyond all that. She's a great girl.) she starts asking for someone to "cuddle" with her... and she kept looking at me, and I know she wanted me to do that cuddling...

Yea, it's turning into a great situation, but there's something you have to realize: Growing up hating people, and being hated by people has kind of left me affectionately inept. So anyway, I climb back onto the booth with her, and I'm feeling like a little dog, and she's a matriarch: she rubbing my head and breathing on the back of my neck, and we're chilling out(BTW, that was one of the only times I didnt feel the need to break for a cigarette.)

So anyway, Ill skip past all the other drama... We got back to Jessica and Jamie's house and we were still chilling out and laughin, but then my friend and jamie went into the back room to look at shit on the computer(or something) and it was just me and jessica... We walking into her room(where I continue to tell jokes, and continues to laugh)

The here comes my friend! Apparently one of his other friends(who is a female) is all depressed and shit, and wants to kill herself(or somethig stupid like that) And he wants to borrow my car. and I wouldnt let him do it. It's a standard(which he doesnt know how to drive) he car is all fucked up(he backed into a telephone pole with his driverside door up, and nearly broke it off) he's a shitty driver(he really is) and I worked long an dhard to pay for my car, and idk if you're a driving instructor! no one drives my car but me.

So we reach a deal, I'll take him to his house, and he'll take his car, and Jessica wil come with me... They tried telling me that jessica and I would be alone(and idk, but I think this was just the opportunity jessica was looking for) So i go for it.

So, we stop and get gas, talking, etc etc and finally we get back to her place. We talk and talk until my friend and jessica's sister come back, then we get a little more comfortable. We're laying down, with the lights off, and she notices I'm shaking(which I constantly do, because I am incredibly thin, and tension so fucking high Michael Jordan couldnt grab it. So she wants to give me a backrub. Also, I was bit nervous, because in my mind, I'm not much of a catch. I'm thin, jittery, and have back acne:(... and I'm really starting to like this girl, and I just dont wanna fuck it up.

So she's rubbing my back, and untying some of the knots, and I feel helpless under this lovely young lady, I'm like putty in her hand. She running her fingers up and down my back, and teasing me. And, generally, I hate people touching me, so this is a new thing(sort of) and so anyway, we move on and start kissing(on and off, "making out" for a while, then snuggling) and seeing as how I have no idea what's going on in my mind I do the only thing I can do to cope... I tell fucking jokes...

Yea... jokes... please, dont feel sorry for me(although I do need all the condolences I can get) So after a while, we're both getting tired(its like 5 am by now) so we turn off and goto sleep. about 40 minutes ago, at 1 pm, jessica's boyfriend shows up(who i met last night before denny's) and I leave.

Okay, so anyway, here's my quandary. Jessica has a boyfriend, and normally I would feel like a jerk for messing around with some other guy's girlfriend, but in this case, to put it blunt, I don't care. Secondly, jessica and jamie are moving to north carolina in 6 months. and finally, I made such a complete ass out of myself(with the jokes) I doubt she'd ever want to try anything again.(even though she more or less laughed her ass off at every joke)

But before her boyfriend got there at 1 she said "we need to hang out more often" and we made a date to goto a kickass rockabilly concert in springfield, and we've decided to expand her horizons on what films she watches, so I wil show her some of my movies(which all kick ass btw)

For once in my life I found someone who makes me not utterly hate the world, who lets me think sometimes a few people aren't fuckheads(most of them still are though)

So anyway, what do you think?

(BTW, I am remember of the old saying: "If she'll do it for you, she'll do it to you"

Any thoughts? Any advice based on past experiences?

All is fair in love and war. The self-depricating humor is counterproductive. You may think it is it part of your charm or being yourself but it ultimately makes you the jester the clown and highlights your insecurities. My advice on the joking is to practice shutting the fuck up.

If you're feeling ackward take it as a sign that you should try some periphary (sp) touching and work your way in.

Wishing you and your massive member all the best.

How big is that thing anyways ?

- Stretcher
 

stretcher74

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All is fair in love and war. The self-depricating humor is counterproductive. You may think it is it part of your charm or being yourself but it ultimately makes you the jester the clown and highlights your insecurities. My advice on the joking is to practice shutting the fuck up.

A lot or women will actually tell their GF's things like , "He would have scored with me, but he just wouldn't stop talking on the way home"

If you're feeling ackward take it as a sign that you should try some periphary (sp) touching and work your way in.

Wishing you and your massive member all the best.

How big is that thing anyways ?

- Stretcher
 

mephistopheles

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Yeah, I have a thought.

How can you play guitar when you can't jerk off with a burned hand?

:confused:

lol, i was showing him chords, not playing so much... also, superglue on my finger tips.



btw Stretcher, its 7.75(8 or 8.25 on a good day) x 6

Yea, I'm gonna practice shutting the fuck up tonight at work... Idk how it will work out... thats something I needta work on though.

lol, I'm proof positive that having a big dick isnt everything.
 

B_Think_Kink

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If it took you till now to realise that there is more to having a big dick to getting women... you have yet to learn many things, and have lived a sheltered life.
 

basque9

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mephistopheles .....btw Stretcher said:
Yes mephisto you got that right...you are definitely not one of the well-endowed.. but no matter.... you ooze charm and your silken tongue and bubbling personality really define you !:rolleyes:
 

nwarluvs2jo

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Meph,

You make this girl laugh, even if the jokes may be cheesy. That's big. Girls love a guy who can make them laugh and they can have a good time with. Go with the flow. Just remember she's leaving in 6 months so don't fall into a relationship too quickly. You don't want to have that weird fuzzy feeling inside and she be gone in a couple of months. Long distances can be quite a problem.

You can always show her your hand and say you are having a little problem keeping Mr. Happy content =)

Keep up the good work man.

-dave
 

mephistopheles

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If it took you till now to realise that there is more to having a big dick to getting women... you have yet to learn many things, and have lived a sheltered life.

Why dont you do us all a favor and spare youre second hand insight.
No one will take you seriously until you move past the Mario Manson bullshit.

Also, I'm glad I could entertain you... whether it was with the story, or pictures of my cock.:biggrin1:

Either way... Aside from thinkkink... thanks for the feedback.
 

B_Think_Kink

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Thats Marilyn Manson... if you can't even read. And an attest to one of the smartest human beings. People don't read signatures to take people seriously... cause damn yours is pretty brutal.
 

mephistopheles

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Thats Marilyn Manson... if you can't even read. And an attest to one of the smartest human beings. People don't read signatures to take people seriously... cause damn yours is pretty brutal.

Mario, Marilyn? Who gives a fuck? And he is far from "one of the smartest human beings" if you think that then you'd prolly think GG Allin was jesus christ himself.

You need to get out and learn more things, you'd find out just how much of a sham your current way of living really is. Marilyn Manson is a shock rocker who is better for nothing than to have rumors started about him having a few ribs removed so he could suck his own cock... If theys thats one of the most intelligent men in the world I'd hate to see the most ignorant.

You're a girl who is star struck by a waste of space, blood, and muscle tissue. If Marilyn Manson would have never existed I doubt the world would be any different(aside from a few less guys walking around with breast implants)

BTW: He stole a lot of his "stuff" from Alice Cooper and HP Lovecraft.
 

vinny_spiruccino

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I think you're fine man. I mean, though you might be feeling like you're a sped, who hasn't? Age brings refinement of words, and to be honest - when you gain a few years you really don't give a fuck so there's no hard feelings when you would otherwise be self conscious.

From your posts, you're obviously intelligent; a bit sarcastic/smart ass-ish; and are seeking to define who you are. We all were at one point or another. Takes time bro, but you'll get there.
 

scottsimms

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Mephistopheles, I'm less concerned about your amatory situation than I am with the fact that you seem like an angry young man who has turned that anger against himself. I hope you don't think I'm condescending when I say that you might benefit from talking to someone to help you feel better about youself (and the world around you) and develop more self-confidence. Would you please consider it?
 

B_Think_Kink

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Mario, Marilyn? Who gives a fuck? And he is far from "one of the smartest human beings" if you think that then you'd prolly think GG Allin was jesus christ himself.

You need to get out and learn more things, you'd find out just how much of a sham your current way of living really is. Marilyn Manson is a shock rocker who is better for nothing than to have rumors started about him having a few ribs removed so he could suck his own cock... If theys thats one of the most intelligent men in the world I'd hate to see the most ignorant.

You're a girl who is star struck by a waste of space, blood, and muscle tissue. If Marilyn Manson would have never existed I doubt the world would be any different(aside from a few less guys walking around with breast implants)

BTW: He stole a lot of his "stuff" from Alice Cooper and HP Lovecraft.

His IQ is higher than yours, and maybe if you got out from your basement, and read some things, pehaps maybe his bio, which was great for anyone who wants to learn why Marilyn Manson does what he does. He didn't have ribs removed, thats a rumour, get over it. The breast thing is comical, and there was a reason behind it, but then again, your too shallow to realise that either. The stuff he stole was crap in the first place, he just made it sound good....
 

mephistopheles

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His IQ is higher than yours, and maybe if you got out from your basement, and read some things, pehaps maybe his bio, which was great for anyone who wants to learn why Marilyn Manson does what he does. He didn't have ribs removed, thats a rumour, get over it. The breast thing is comical, and there was a reason behind it, but then again, your too shallow to realise that either. The stuff he stole was crap in the first place, he just made it sound good....

Lol.