Lasting too long?

[cutedorkwho]

I have a bit of an issue that's plagued me now since I lost my virginity a few girls back.. It takes me quite a bit of effort, through sex, masturbation or oral to reach orgasm. In fact I've never reached orgasm simply from head or even the best hand job..it's just not enough.

Usually there are other ways to deal with this but lately it's become an issue for me and my partner. After a while it just becomes very painful for her and I'll have to stop, hardly even close to cumming. It's very frustrating, because except for masturbation sex is the only way I can achieve orgasm. I'm left to find my own way to deal with my blue balls. (uh lets count the ways..)

At any rate, I'd love to find a way to experience an orgasm with my partner. It's the most erotic sex I've had to date, very rough and intensely passionate yet it never comes to a climax for me. I'm open to suggestions and tips...

 

[2322]

The most obvious answer is stop or greatly reduce masturbating as that will help you get horny enough to ejaculate without much stimulation.

What sort of condoms do you use? You may benefit from a thinner or polyurethane condom.

Are you circumcised and, if so, do you feel pleasure from any part of the penis other than the glans? How far is your circ scar from the glans? If you are cut very low you may find that the glans is the only area that receives stimulation and many men require a great deal of glans stimulation to attain orgasm. You may want to consider restoring at least to some degree.

Are you on any medication or do you use recreational drugs? If so what?

How do you feel about your girlfriend? Have you had issues with any other partners or just her?

The condition you're experiencing is called anorgasmia. I suggest you read-up on it if you haven't.

Good luck CDW!

 

[johnPNY]

Sex in my opinion, is far more mental than it is physical. You may be incredibly attracted to someone physically, and the sensation of your bodies may be incredible when you are together, however if there is something going on mentally, than it can outweigh all of this.

For instance if I am incredibly excited about something mentally and the right thoughts are coming through my mind I can cum in under a minute. If I am super horny though and incredibly into something physically but my mind is not completely in it (depression, thoughts elsewhere, worries, stresses, anything that can deplete your mental resources) then it doesn't even matter, I cannot get off unless I strain for it and then it's just not fun.

You said you are experiencing very rough and passionate sex, so my guess is perhaps there is some deep rooted issue you are not even aware of. Hopefully someone here can help you pick/explore at some areas, if not, I would honestly suggest getting some private, professional help.

Good luck, and PS - I'm jealous!

 

[largeornot]

try smoking some ganja...

 

[DonJuanDeShenzhen]

Teach her how to give a good blowjob (hand-assisted). Tight grip, steady movements, and slurping on the head with a lot of spit.

The best part is that there is no effort on your part. Just sit back and enjoy.

This technique is very effective to make you come. I'm quite a fan of pornstar Rocco. This guy has massive stamina. But if a girl sucks him like that he becomes a premature ejaculator.

There is one movie where a 40-50 year old women does it and he comes in 2 minutes. I think it was in "Rocco Cavello". Show the scene to your girl casually. She will learn from it without you saying a word.

 

[cutedorkwho]

Thanks for the advice guys. I normally almost once a day, so maybe 5-6 times a week. I will try holding out for a week and if I don't die from blue balls hopefully I'll get somewhere with her.

As for the mental situation, I suppose that may normally have an effect but I don't think it does here. We're not bf/gf, we're basically just horny sex buddies. So I don't think emotions are even at play here, it's just deep lust for each other.

Also, despite my efforts to get her to try, she doesn't do oral. So that is kind of out.

As for me, I am circumcised yes, but not too tightly. The entire shaft is quite sensual, though I agree much less so than the head. It's somewhat easy to masturbate, so I don't think it's really a sensitivity thing. It may be the condoms, true. I'm using the regular blue trojan lubricated condoms. It fits somewhat snug, but at 7x5" I don't think that really necessitates magnums.

As for drugs, ah..i wish. But thanks to random drug screening, I'm not using. At the most 2-3 beers/drinks beforehand.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

The best sex I ever had was with someone who I was connected to on more than just a sexual level. It was powerful because there was more to it than just a roll in the hay, there was strong emotions which heightened the sex.

So build more of a relationship with her or find someone to have a strong relationship with and see if sex is more powerful with a meaningful friendship behind it.

 

[117817]

As for drugs, ah..i wish. But thanks to random drug screening, I'm not using. At the most 2-3 beers/drinks beforehand.

Drinking alcohol can make it harder to orgasm. Ever heard of whiskey dick? That's a well-known term for your condition when caused by alcohol.

 

[cutedorkwho]

Yes, I have but this is 2 beers over the course of probably 2 hours. And I have managed to reach orgasm before with a partner while quite heavily intoxicated, so I don't think I'm past that threshold.

 

[SCSea]

I'd try a polyurethane condom like Supra or Avanti or polyisoprene like Skyn.

I didn't start to cum from head until I was in my 30s. Never saw it as a big deal - I enjoyed the sucking, I just wasn't able to get to the edge.

Some Rx drugs can cause this problem, especially Zoloft, Paxil, Prozac and other antidepressants. One method in the literature is to take a single 50mg Sudafed (not the "PE" formula) 30 minutes before sex. Of course, at age 21, I wasn't always aware I'd be having sex in the next 30 minutes. ;0)

E

 

[Phil Ayesho]

It sounds to me like you need more intense stimulation, and not the rubbing kind, but the pounding kind.

I recommend heavy ball stretchers... you wrap a pound of lead filled leather around your scrotum... and when you are pounding away at a woman, your balls will feel like they are not only being pulled, but swinging to and fro, slapping against your girls ass tenth of a second after your hips do.

No, to answer your question, it doesn't hurt... the stretchers are wide enough to take the brunt of the impact off your actual nuts.
In fact... its rather addictively satisfying.

In my experience, the sensation doubles the intensity of sexual pleasure. And the women I have been with have loved the sensation, too... women are all about the pounding, and this just increases the sensation of pounding.

I currently wear about 4 pounds of stacked stretchers... and its like I am spanking her with my balls.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

It sounds to me like you need more intense stimulation, and not the rubbing kind, but the pounding kind.

I recommend heavy ball stretchers... you wrap a pound of lead filled leather around your scrotum... and when you are pounding away at a woman, your balls will feel like they are not only being pulled, but swinging to and fro, slapping against your girls ass tenth of a second after your hips do.

No, to answer your question, it doesn't hurt... the stretchers are wide enough to take the brunt of the impact off your actual nuts.
In fact... its rather addictively satisfying.

In my experience, the sensation doubles the intensity of sexual pleasure. And the women I have been with have loved the sensation, too... women are all about the pounding, and this just increases the sensation of pounding.

I currently wear about 4 pounds of stacked stretchers... and its like I am spanking her with my balls.

What in the fuck?!

 

[open501s]

I use to have this problem; I would just wear out my partners when they would try to get me off. I would often fake orgasm just to quit.

I would joke about it and just say "I'm cum shy". A play off of the "pee shy" problem some have.

 

[Phil Ayesho]

What in the fuck?!

Try it, Kink... you will like it...


The attached pictures are not of me... just for a visual idea of what 3 pounds of stretcher look like... I prefer the softer lead filled leather ones... but could not find a good picture on those being worn.

 

[hypoc8]

OMG! Just when you think you've heard of and seen everything. Who sits around and thinks this kind of shit up? There ain't no way that's happening.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

Try it, Kink... you will like it...


The attached pictures are not of me... just for a visual idea of what 3 pounds of stretcher look like... I prefer the softer lead filled leather ones... but could not find a good picture on those being worn.

Again, what the fuck, ain't no way the OP needs that.

 

[D_Harry_Crax]

I have a bit of an issue that's plagued me now since I lost my virginity a few girls back.. It takes me quite a bit of effort, through sex, masturbation or oral to reach orgasm. In fact I've never reached orgasm simply from head or even the best hand job..it's just not enough.

Usually there are other ways to deal with this but lately it's become an issue for me and my partner. After a while it just becomes very painful for her and I'll have to stop, hardly even close to cumming. It's very frustrating, because except for masturbation sex is the only way I can achieve orgasm. I'm left to find my own way to deal with my blue balls. (uh lets count the ways..)

At any rate, I'd love to find a way to experience an orgasm with my partner. It's the most erotic sex I've had to date, very rough and intensely passionate yet it never comes to a climax for me. I'm open to suggestions and tips...

I think you need to do just cut back on the whacking off, and also maybe not use porn while whacking off. Just enjoy the physical sensations and profoundly understand the sensations and signals from start to finish without focusing on anything or anyone else.

 

[Phil Ayesho]

OMG! Just when you think you've heard of and seen everything. Who sits around and thinks this kind of shit up? There ain't no way that's happening.

Those that do not, know naught.


Really... it may look extreme, but those are pretty mild compared to a lot of stretching that goes on...

Trust me... it is a fantastic feeling... doesn't hurt... and I never had a woman not love the hell out of the way it feels..

 

[D_Pubert Stabbingpain]

I have a bit of an issue that's plagued me now since I lost my virginity a few girls back.. It takes me quite a bit of effort, through sex, masturbation or oral to reach orgasm. In fact I've never reached orgasm simply from head or even the best hand job..it's just not enough.

Usually there are other ways to deal with this but lately it's become an issue for me and my partner. After a while it just becomes very painful for her and I'll have to stop, hardly even close to cumming. It's very frustrating, because except for masturbation sex is the only way I can achieve orgasm. I'm left to find my own way to deal with my blue balls. (uh lets count the ways..)

At any rate, I'd love to find a way to experience an orgasm with my partner. It's the most erotic sex I've had to date, very rough and intensely passionate yet it never comes to a climax for me. I'm open to suggestions and tips...

Ok, don't laugh guys!

cutedorkwho, when is the last time you have sneezed?
histimine is required for you to sneeze and guesss what else? ORGASM!
That is why anti-histimines cause huge problems for guys and fucks up our prostate glands.
Yep, you may want to try a histidine supplement:
Histamine - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
:smile:

 

[Black Guy in EA]

Back to the subject at hand it took me ages to cum when I lost my virginity and a few other times since then. And I have only had one girl with the patience and skill to get me off by hand never came from getting head it feels nice but just not that nice. A lot of depends on the partner a couple of partners ruined it by saying things like have you cum yet 5 minutes into giving her a good pounding I mean christ how bad are your usual lays.

Just lay off the wanking and alcohol and I reckon you should be fine personally. Just glad I am not the only one.