Learning to bottom

[deleted15951801]

Hey

Sorry if this has been discussed before. I did search…

I have always been a top. Quite a selfish one, and mainly into just lying back and getting sucked, or when it comes to fucking just interested in my own needs - although it’s very hot to make a bottom cum from my cock.

I have bottomed once and it hurt like hell and hurt for days. But I did like the sensation of making him cum and the actual cumming inside me.

I would love to explore this more. I generally fancy “straight” looking guys and I think being more versatile would increase my options.

HOWEVER whenever I have tried to learn to bottom eg with a toy it’s been painful or frustrating or not that wild.

So what I’m asking is how can I learn to enjoy being a bottom?

Thanks!

 

[MNpervert]

If it's painful every time even with lube and taking it slow you may want to see your doctor.

Lot's of lube and take it slow. You need time for your sphincters to relax and let it in.

 

[briacon429]

If it's painful every time even with lube and taking it slow you may want to see your doctor.

Lot's of lube and take it slow. You need time for your sphincters to relax and let it in.

Agreed. I always recommend anal trainers: they’re a set of butt plugs in different sizes, so you can start with a small one and work your way to the bigger ones. They definitely worked for me, since my ass tends to cramp up too, at least at first.

Hopefully these techniques work (along with other stuff you can try) but if not, listen to your body! Some holes aren’t meant to bottom, so don’t force yourself if you don’t genuinely enjoy it.

 

[Brodie888]

Your problem is most likely not enough lube or not reapplying lube. This is especially a problem with waterbased lube.

Second most like likely is going too girthy too quickly. When you are new to anal, you need to progressively increase the girth as your hole relaxes during your session.

 

[Brodie888]

One suggestion for learning to enjoy anal play is to get a vibrator. One that has the vibration in the tip such as a Lelo Loki. Don't get the lelo billy unless your ass is a tight as a fish's hole.

Locating your prostate and pressing down on it as you orgasm is a rite of passage for any card carrying bottom.

 

[LPSG Simon]

Sometimes its finding the right lube.

A friend recently tried j-lube. It's used for fisting and comes in a powder you have to mix. It really did the trick for them.

 

[deleted20588921]

I’ve started bottoming and so far it has been an eye opening experience. First guy it was painful with but then a guy really took his time with me and rimmed me a lot first and used lube going slow. Now I am much better at taking it and loving the feeling of taking a guy deep and cum inside me. Feels very masculine to me

 

[cedarizzo]

Lots of great replies. I would like to add, RELAX! I think sometimes guys try to hard, you really concentrate and try to force it to happen. (I know I am guilty of this sometimes.) Just relax, control your breathing and try to open your hole. It takes some training to be able to do that without concentrating on that.

 

[deleted7488261]

Tips: find a comfortable position that relaxes the anus (knees to the chest).
+ lots of lube + find a top that understands you. In this case you might wanna avoid random horny strangers.

 

[bravesoldier]

My experience in a nutshell, breaking in the anal muscles. They are quite tight for a good reason, lol. My first time I had not imagined the pain I'd feel. It felt like he was trying to punch a new hole in me, almost like he thought he was on my hole but really wasn't. I thought of what I'd heard him say earlier, that he was NOT cut out to be a bottom. So, without every detail of my experience I will say it takes nothing more than a continuing desire, a ton of patience, proper lube internally and externally and a mental state of mind that you're going to have to endure some pain until you are broken in. Its like you have to get to the point where your asshole becomes an entrance as well as an exit, and that time will come with patience. The experience that left me conditioned and hot for more was when I reluctantly allowed a guy with 6.5" of girth to have my butthole. Once he got in it was like my anus knew it had been totally invaded and it simply surrendered. It was totally passionate and hot. The next time with him it was like my hole remembered that intense of a stretch and immediately went back to that level of stretch. I still see the guy every chance I get and now I'm not even using poppers, which dilate the anal sphincter. Last night he took me three or four times on my side, and it was sexual bliss. I came hard with him fucking me; his hand barely gripping my hard-on. Then after about the fourth insertion he seeded his boy and we were done for the night.

Key phrase though, break-in.

 

[lance-ryder]

Silicone toys of varying sizes, stretching with a plug, and patience have helped me a ton

 

[scottycocksucker]

I think it's important to have an experienced top... especially in the beginning. If they know what they are doing, they can teach you some good breathing tools for relaxing your hole and letting him go deep.

 

[chrisrobin]

I’ve started bottoming and so far it has been an eye opening experience. First guy it was painful with but then a guy really took his time with me and rimmed me a lot first and used lube going slow. Now I am much better at taking it and loving the feeling of taking a guy deep and cum inside me. Feels very masculine to me

Guys who think they just have to poke a cock up your ass are jerks. Sorry your first fucking was painful and left you feeling uncomfortable. My first was painful but he took his time, shot his load, remained in me and then fucked me a second time and wow, that was good. It's all about being taken slowly, worked up into a state of sexual awareness and being relaxed about what going on, rimming is a great way to get a new boy willing to take cock and it's not a sin to be very well-lubed. Glad you are enjoying being fucked bareback, yep, masculine with a load in you, I know, been there, enjoyed it enormously