Lesbians more accepted.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by ChocolateThunder, Mar 12, 2007.

  1. ChocolateThunder

    ChocolateThunder New Member

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    Sorry if this thread was talked about before but i couldnt find it. But why do you all think it is more accepted to be a lesbian than to be a gay male?
     
  2. davidjh7

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    I think it depends on the particular demographic group you are talking to. A great many straight men enjoy the idea of lesbian sex, mostly because the project themselves into the picture, and two women on them is one of the most reported heterosexual male fantasies there is. The stereotypes of both hurt the person, but I suspect there is a tiny marginal acceptance mroe of lesbians, because we are a patriarichol society mostly, and the fantasy aspect has straight men be more accepting of this. Also, since they understand the attraction of women, they can idenitfy with it. The gay stereotype, ufortunately, has become associated with gay= not a man=loss of masculinity. I suspect this is why in some cultures, men can have sex with men, as long as they still do and act in the expected manly ways. As long as they are macho and marry and have children and don;t admit to having any same sex feelings, they are still considered men. If they admit to having any kind of same sex attraction or emotional feelings, then they are no longer men. IN interviews with heterosexual males, about why some of them felt they hated gay men, the most reported reason was the fear that if the gay man did anything to them, or with them, then they would lose masculinity. Very few reported any other reason for invalid hatred. Two women having sex, or expressing feelings towards each other, isn't often associated with loss of femininity, unless the image of the lesbian is her taking on masculin characteristics, i.e., they begin to dress and act like men. IN this case, those lesbians often get strongly abused--not, I suspect, for their sexual preference, but for going outside of their expected roles. This is my hypothesis based on certain studies and information I have correlated. It may be total BS as well...:rolleyes:
     
  3. Bryan_Lyte2

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    Ditto.
    :cool:
     
  4. DC_DEEP

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    More accepted by whom? Generally, straight men find the thought or image of two women having sex to be titillating, but find the thought or image of two men having sex to be disgusting. I don't have any quantitative evidence, but I'm just guessing that men would have more of a tendency to project - that is, imagine themselves as a part of any sexual imagery that they enjoy. So, with two women or with a man and a woman, they imagine themselves as a part of that action with a woman. When the sexual imagery involves only men, that same projection places them in a sexual situation with another man, which they find upsets their own self-sense of sexuality.
     
  5. zaza

    zaza New Member

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    Is it common for women to find the thought of two men having sex arousing? It is rarely mentioned, but I for one find the image of two aroused men a turn on, and that is what two men having sex is.
    I am not attracted to women, although I consider some women to be attractive. I find the thought of two women having sex to be disgusting.
     
  6. D_Garmanswait Glassnads

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    I don't look at two girls having sex and get turned on, more the thought of me having sex with them. I still prefer the idea of straight sex because it dosn't require the energy of imagination.

    The most arousing thing for me is noise, I like the sound a women makes when having sex.

    I don't know any lesbians but I know gay men, are there fewer gay women then gay men?
     
  7. Ethyl

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    Bingo.
    More common than you think. Only recently have women felt comfortable talking about it.
    I don't find it disgusting at all but it doesn't arouse me either.
     
  8. B_horribleperson

    B_horribleperson New Member

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    Lesbians Are Good... Very Good
     
  9. LeeEJ

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    Conversely, I can say that the thought of two women having sex with each other -- but wanting NO participation by me -- isn't very much of a turnon.
     
  10. lightninggirl

    lightninggirl New Member

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    i'm going to "see" your lesbian acceptance theory and "raise" you the look-ist theory:

    it is more generally accepted to see two LIPSTICK lesbians getting it on.

    throw in a butch lesbian, and suddenly society isn't so interested ... or accepting. two butch lesbians, and forget it. generally, people only want to see FEMININE, attractive women go at it. hell, they don't really have to be pretty, but they need to be femme. i was watching "real sex" the other week, and apparently there was such a lack of butch lesbian porn in the industry some butch lesbians had to start their own a few years ago! sad.
     
  11. No_Strings

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    *applause*

    not really much I can add to that, pretty much exactly what needed to be said :smile:

    MB; your gallery? :frown1:
     
  12. DC_DEEP

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    Oh, no, Bliss, please tell me your gallery didn't disappear due to the recently banned troll?
     
  13. Ethyl

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    Oh, hell no. I'm taking a little time off to mostly lurk and immerse myself completely in real life for a while. I'll have new ones when I return to regularly scheduled posting. :smile:
     
  14. Mr. Snakey

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    Oh the baby jesus! Praise the lord!!:smile: :tongue: :wink:
     
  15. MattBrick

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    It's true that more men identify themselves as lesbian than men identify themselves as gay.

    It's true that lots of men like the idea of women having sex, yes, but we're talking good looking young women, not your construction boot types.

    This brings us to my next point. Why is lesbianism more acceptable?
    1)Fewer lesbians act gay. You see lots of gay guys around acting like steriotypical gays, that is flamboyantly.
    It's not fair, but that isn't socially acceptable
    2)It's a mans world. If a lesbian acts dykey a man gets it. A woman of today calls it empowerment
    3) There is a high turnover in gay life, that's just how it seems to be. Statistically though, lesbians a) tend to be less promiscuous than gay men, and b) tend to form more stable relationships c)lesbians form families more often and this contributes to a and b. People feel like they are less of a sexually immoral counter culture.
    4) The whole HIV issue. We know that this disease spreads can spread a number of ways. People still think that just gay men spread aids though.
    This is especially true among african americans. Lesbians never spread HIV if they only have sex with other lesbians.
    5) Men are the problem in society. Women are the builders of society. Or wasn't that what you learned in your feminist study requirement class?
    Gay men are perceived as shirking their role in society- not doing manly things like being fathers, firefighters and army men, and buying women stuff. Lesbians are good at spinning this to help their cause, and don't stand in much to stand in solidarity with gays on this - quite the opposits
     
  16. Matthew

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    Yeah, why don't gay men fulfill their role in the army??? LOL

    My experience has been the polar opposite of this. For example, lesbians played a huge and critical role in the battle against AIDS. They played leadership roles in the fight for research, fundraising, education, and not least of all, they were there in the streets when activism was necessary to combat the disease and the ignorance and neglect that allowed it to flourish. If anything, I'd say gay men have been missing in action during struggles specific to lesbians.
     
  17. DC_DEEP

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    Don't worry Matthew, MattBrick has been misled. I'm guessing he got most of his information from Beverly LaHaye and Fred Phelps. They both have tons of "useful" information on their respective websites.
     
  18. SomeGuyOverThere

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    Thats due to the different acceptable practices between men and women I think.

    Women (in my experience) are very comfortable with complimenting one another and talking about everythign and anything. Most female friends of mine are very open about their sex lives between one another, and very open about what they think is attractive in men and women.

    The reverse is true about my male friends, they all keep their sex lives totally private, they don't compliment one another (that's "gay") and son't talk about how men look.

    This seems to be common to males and females in the area in which I live (which is a fairly big city).

    What I think the result is, is that women are more comfortasble with themselves sexually, and don't feel threatened by it, while men are more closeted, so sexuality is more threatening (or perhaps are more closeted because they find sexuality more threatening), in either case, it means that women who are lesbians are more comfortable with themselves and their friends probably are aswell, so they are more widley accepted.

    Gay men on thee other hand have to deal with the insecurities of their peers, so it's mroe difficult to be accepted.

    On an overall society level, it seems to me like male sexuality is something that is completely repressed, and female sexuality more liberated.

    I'm sort of rambling here, but I think it's all to do with how comfortable everyone is with their sexuality, and I think mena re on the whole far less comfortable with their sexuality than women, which I think translates into less social acceptence of gay men because men are afraid of being labelled gay.
     
  19. MidusCo.

    MidusCo. New Member

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    Lesbians are actually less accepted around where I live. Its rare to even see a true lesbian with another lesbian as a couple. Mostly to me I dont care but a lot of people around here are highly against lesbians and for the oddest part gay males dont bother them at all.

    So in some aspects I could see that lesbians would be more accepted because in other places Ive lived every girl is either bi or lesbian its not realy rare anymore to see it. Even gay guys are getting more accepted but not as highly as people accept lesbians.
     
  20. vibratingfinger

    vibratingfinger New Member

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    With regards to some of the posts above a friend of mine is a supervisor at the customer service department of one of the largest of payment processing companies for adult oriented websites. I was talking to him yesterdy and I asked him what percentage of the customers were generally female. He said about 10-15%. I wondered among females what kind of porn was more popular, he said amateur porn. I asked him whether lesbian porn was also popular, he said "hell yes." He said about half of the female suscribers are watching lesbian porn(including amateur lesbian porn). I asked him about gay porn, he said he's rarely ever come across that with female customers. He's been with this company for many years so I trust his estimates.
     
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