Lies you've told to get laid..

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by GTS, Oct 18, 2007.

  1. GTS

    GTS New Member

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    I was chatting to another guy about this and some of the answers were just ass splittingly hilarious! What limits will you go to in order to hit that ass! :D

    Someone in the wanted ads is already catching hell for claiming to be a virgin even though he just got out a 6yr relationship and whether its true or not i have certainly used that line before and as my answer previously stated it has 3 good benefits:
    1) sympathy fuck
    2) You can be crap and its expected
    3) You can shock the life out of them with your sudden dirty horny mentality

    A rather shamless one i heard was a dude claiming to be in the marines and being sent to iraq the next day. The girl was unsurprisingly suspect when he slept in till the late afternoon at her flat.

    So come on, what have you said :D
     
  2. classyron

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    I have pretended that I was interested in everything that they said, does that count.

    My buddies and I used to do the "visiting college athlete" routine when we hit the bars. It worked sometimes. I was partying with some friends who played pro hockey and they told me that some of the groupies were asking about me. They told them I was a Russian goalie and did not speak English. That was working really well until some of my actual teammates saw me and yelled to me, and I answered in English.
     
  3. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    I don't think I've ever lied to get laid.
     
  4. chesz001

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    hmm..same here..i told 'em i was a virgin but afterwards..theyre like 'are you reallly a virgin?'so i tell 'em am not..hahaha..but at least i fucked 'em..lol
     
  5. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    "I like all that shit you like too" :cool:
     
  6. B_Swimming Lad

    B_Swimming Lad New Member

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    I have. :rolleyes:

    "No I didn't shag your best friend on a bus"
    "You have really nice eyes"
    "No way do I only love you for your body"
    "I totally did not have your sister last weekend"

    ... Are a few examples. :cool:
     
  7. Lito

    Lito New Member

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    "No, I'm not drunk..."
    "I've been considering getting a steady girlfriend (not exactly a lie, but I never told I was considering the person I was speaking to)"
    "Can we go to some place quieter? I'd love the opportunity to ... talk... to you without distractions."

    Some I remembered :D
     
  8. No_Strings

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    I'm not low enough to do that.
     
  9. frizzle

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    Never asked a girl for sex, they've always asked me.
     
  10. GTS

    GTS New Member

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    bullshit! i think your girlfriend is sitting on your knee while you type! we ALL lie at some point to get things in our favour! Sex is no different
     
  11. Mr. Snakey

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    Oh your so beautifull. I love you. Will you Marry me. You should be a model. Ive never felt this way before. In our five minutes of knowing eachother you have changed me forever. I think im going to cry! This wasnt me talking it was the Southeren Comfort................
     
  12. Blocko

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    I don't lie to get girls into bed, apart from your average white lie to make people feel more comfortable about themselves... I have however lied to get out of situations where girls wanted to sleep with me.

    Sometimes you have friendships to maintain and telling a female in your circle of friends you don't want to sleep with her because she's particularly unattractive (physically or mentally) isn't a good way to do that.
     
  13. No_Strings

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    Nope. I respect women - and myself - far too much to lie to someone just so I can get laid. (FYI: my girlfriend is at work. :wink:)
     
  14. lorne

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    The closest to lieing was in collage I said I needed to use her bathroom after walking her home from the bar (classmate). The tension was high already and is I had to acually piss I don't think I could have I was giving my self a stomach ache i was so hard. So i just stood there and than ran the taps. I came out and She was down the hall in another room yelling do you want me to call a cab or do you want to crash here as I walked over to the room I opened the door and she was stripping her tight jeans off in her room. She was like the couch isn't long enough so you can stay here. I was like I see... She pulled her shirt off to reveal her massive breasts in one of those black sheer bras. I was like wow... you look gorgeous. She goes thanks but this is a two way street. If you get to see me in my panties I get get to see you in yours, She said its like rent. I at that time knew I was primed and bursting over my belt so i figured start with the pants reveal the cock last (no hiding it) She just sat on the bed and watched as I undid the belt and dropped them on the floor. She smiled and said I could just leave them where ever. Than I turned as I took off my shirt facing away from her and bent over to set it with my pants. (the bending motion to make sure everything was poking well over the top.) When I turned around she just snorted Holy fuck. and started to laugh. I was like well you said I was to big for th couch. she laugh and said she meant my height. I was like i know. she sat there staring at me for what felt like ever and bit her lip. finally she was like well I won't be able to sleep wit that stabbing into me all night. she reached out and snapped my boxers off. I jumped a little which made her laugh as she started to pull me over by my cock. She played with it for a while even measured it along her face(which I have to say is sooo hot) and sucked on it for a while till I couldn't take it and hoisted her into her bed and tore her panties off. We ended up fucking like 5 times that night and never made it to sleep and showed up late to class. 4 or five people connected the dots and did the ooooooo thing. My teacher was like thats right your late. I was like yes um Im sorry and sat down she laughed just went and sat with her other girlfriends. The whole class this one buddy of mine who sat a cross from me kept smiling with his mouth open and knodding his head yes and every now and than threw in the thumbs up. he was good at drawing attention to what people tried to hide.
     
  15. B_Veronica_Divine

    B_Veronica_Divine New Member

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    "That's the biggest one I"ve ever seen!"

    ((The guy was big... but that almost never a true story with me.))
     
  16. kazooplayer

    kazooplayer New Member

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    "It's a little weird, but it works for you."
     
  17. lorne

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    hahahaha harsh (kind to boost their ego) harsh to secretly smile about it heheh I have accepted there are bigger if Im not the biggest i don't mind. if someone is bigger I know they are big hehe
     
  18. DC_DEEP

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    No, we don't all lie at some point to get things in our favour. Don't project your insecurities on me. I've never - not once - lied to get laid.
     
  19. B_Bonky

    B_Bonky New Member

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    How about "I love you"
     
  20. B_Bonky

    B_Bonky New Member

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    yeah but gay guys don't have to lie to get laid

    straight guys do
     
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