Life without SEX

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by missbec, Jun 23, 2009.

  1. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    Do you think it can be done?

    OR

    Are you one who is celibate?

    I am tired of pushing, begging and pleading with my partner to fuck me at least once a week.

    Now after 5 days of my monthlys my dearest has caught a cold/flu.

    I am becoming agitated in my everyday activities, I feel for the reason of not having intercourse for one and a half weeks (my longest period in YEARS). -(btw, I realise this sounds insane!)

    Sex is not essential for survival, thus I should not NEED sex. I want it.

    I dont know. Maybe it is just me, I love sex. Mind you, I am the younger in the relationship of 17 years difference.

    SO, I am thinking I may try and go without for as long as I can.

    Hence the Q's at the top. Anyone in the same boat for a different reason??

    -nic
     
  2. Enid

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    I am sorry to hear of your troubles. I too love sex and couldn't go without it when I have a regular partner/significant other. I'd HAVE to have similar sexual compatibility (once a day would be ideal...) or I'd go batshit!

    That said, I have gone through periods of celibacy due to not being involved. The longest was 4 years, there was one other period close to that. I can go without sex when there's no one around to have it with. It takes a special person to catch my eye.

    Actually I just remembered, I tend to block it out due to how awful it was, but...I was involved for 4 years with a schizophrenic man. At the midway mark, he had a breakdown and his meds were adjusted. After that, he couldn't stay hard for more than a few minutes and generally lost all interest in sex. So, I ended up not having sex for the last 2 years of that relationship. When it ended I was single for 2 years. So that was the 4 year period of no sex. It was hideous.


    Anyways I feel your pain.
     
    #2 Enid, Jun 23, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2009
  3. Smartalk

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    I can sympathis with your situation, it is difficult when partners have different sexdrive levels. Not an easy situation to resolve, but begging and pleading with your partner can from his side be applying more pressure on him to perform. This can result in not wanting to indulge in sex as it can feel as though it is being done as a sense of duty and not natural mutual arousal. Under these circumstances the chances of one or both of you enjoying the intimacy of the moment is very slim leacing to resentment and a feeling of failure. You being more frustrated and your partner feeling a failure, which will have a devastating effect on his self confidence and esteem.

    I suggest that you do as sex therapists recommend and just start with intimate touching, but not of the sexual organs, explore and get to know each others intimate areas that give pleasure. then move on to kissing, then mutual masturbation. then when you are both read move onto full intercourse. THis must be done over weeks maybe months. Learn to rediscover each other sexually without any expectations or pressures.

    Hope this helps
     
  4. Pendlum

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    Well, I've gone without it my whole life, albeit a short one because of my age. :tongue: Save masturbation and porn, sex isn't really part of my life.
     
  5. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    I've gone without it my whole life, albeit a boring one because of my age! :mad: Save masturbation, porn and lpsg, sex isn't really part of my life! :rolleyes:
     
  6. boerkie

    boerkie New Member

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    became sexually active in standard 5, (7th grade), age 14, and have been that way until age 41.

    a regular cock whore, and doing the bi dance regularly.

    tried to jump anything that moved, if it did not move, i would kick or rub it till it moved and then jump it, or attempt to, at least!! .

    then at 41, had a major catharsis in my life and as part of that, promised myself to unslut (GRIN) me. celibacy came with that. so now i jack the crap outta myself, but leave others alone and its weird at first, but rather satisfying nowadays.satisfying, as i relate to people for who they are inside, not for what they could be with me inside them!!

    the skin-hunger is what could get me roaming the feeding grounds again. but for now, me, myself and i, a threesome! GRIN!!
     
    #6 boerkie, Jun 23, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2009
  7. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    A good choice of username 'smarttalk' !

    You are correct in saying this is causing the relationship to drift apart. I know this. :(

    We are both stubborn people. I have suggested going to a relationship Doc but have not gone through with it. We have never been 'intimate'. We dont say 'i love you' to ea other.

    He is a wonderful, kind, caring and generous guy who is not the sexual partner I long for. ( i guses you cant have everything in life) I shoudl tone myself down a bit, however, when he does decide to fuck me it is always when HE is ready to go to sleep. Thus no spontinuity.

    TOday is the day ill be booking that appt.

    Thank you for all of your advice,


    Nic
     
  8. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    Oh boerkie you make me laugh. LOL if only I was able to kick my darling till he moved!

    Suprised your member hasnt fallen off yet :/

    Oh, ever thought of entering a cuckold situation? Would be interesting, esp. in your situation (grins) CB-3000 maybe?? ;)

    -nic
     
  9. Deno

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    I think the phrase "periods of celibacy" is funny. I know this is a womens issue but it basically describes my life for like 20 years. A week and a half come on now!!!
     
  10. B_FruitFly

    B_FruitFly New Member

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    I havent had sex in years and in am fijne with it. Its overrated in my book.
     
  11. got_lost

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    Oh I'm glad you said it cos I wouldn't have been so polite!

    A week and a half and it's time to see a councillor?!!?!? :wtf1:

    Plus the poor guy has a cold and is feeling unwell!
    Maybe he wants to ensure he can breathe through his nose during sex!


    Also bloody insulting to those with much bigger problems!
     
  12. ghostycrow

    ghostycrow New Member

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    Councillor...? o_O
    You say it insults those with worse problems? Well "bigger" is a relative term.
    Answering the question:
    Although I do admit it seems trivial in my eyes, you have my sympathy.
     
  13. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    Thats not V. nice now is it?

    And why, dear K8, did you waste your time in replying to this post?

    Maybe i should have mentioned this is an ONGOING prob 4 both of us.

    Just needed some SIMPLE advice/ experiences.

    BUT hey, there's always someone else in the world who has outdone another. Im sure there are people who have died virgins.

    -nic
     
  14. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    Thats not V. nice now is it?

    And why, dear K8, did you waste your time in replying to this post?

    Maybe i should have mentioned this is an ONGOING prob 4 both of us.

    Just needed some SIMPLE advice/ experiences.

    BUT hey, there's always someone else in the world who has outdone another. Im sure there are people who have died virgins.

    -nic

    ps/
     
  15. missbec

    missbec New Member

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    Thats not V. nice now is it?

    And why, dear K8, did you waste your time in replying to this post?

    Maybe i should have mentioned this is an ONGOING prob 4 both of us.

    Just needed some SIMPLE advice/ experiences.

    BUT hey, there's always someone else in the world who has outdone another. Im sure there are people who have died virgins.

    -nic

    ps/ If only i could make it 2 years w.out having probs!
     
  16. B_Stronzo

    B_Stronzo New Member

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    I can only address this OP from a personal standpoint. For me no. It cannot be done. Sex is ... well sex. It's great.

    However I believe many people (I know several) do not sexualize the way I do ... they're not all that interested. Good for them I say.

    I've been having some form of sex since I was seven.

    It's been great.

    Of course this brings up the whole topic of female sexuality being a very different thing than male sexuality. I have to think your ability to abstain comes from your being female.

    Males (in my own experience and generally) detach from their sexual beings when having sex to a much greater degree than the women I've engaged in sexual contact.
     
  17. MagicJohnsonFan

    MagicJohnsonFan New Member

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    I started having sex at 16 and with 2 exceptions have rarely gone more than a couple months without. However, toward the end of my marriage I actually went about 2 years. Difficult to believe now - and it would have been difficult to believe prior! It started out in such a way that I didn't really notice at first, then eventually I just didn't care. I actually thought at the time that maybe I had "used up" all my sex drive in the preceding years and didn't have any left! Thank goodness I got over it. :wink:
     
    #17 MagicJohnsonFan, Jun 26, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2009
  18. D_Aston Asstonne

    D_Aston Asstonne Account Disabled

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    There would be NO life without sex as its the sole reason for my existance! What a horrid thought.
     
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