Life without sex

[DevonTexas]

Have you ever gone so long without having sex that you've come to believe it may never happen again? I'm kinda stressed out about it and don't even know if I could initiate it if the chance came up.

 

[cozy_n_quiet]

I have an know what you mean. I would say the best thing to do is not really stress too much about it.

 

[wallyj84]

In my third year without sex. Not stressed about it at all.

I don't think I'll ever have sex or a relationship again, but that's okay. Sex isn't really thay big a deal. I miss casual physical affection like hugs and kisses more than sex, honestly.

If you really want to have sex, why not hire a prostitute?

 

[rtg]

Not exactly, but it's my new goal to see how long I can go without sex. I'm guessing / planning it's going to be awhile.

 

[concupisys]

how long a person goes without sex has a lot of factors to consider.... there's the want/need factor, how active a person looks for it, how often a person is in environments that warrant finding a sex partner, etc, etc.... and of course everyone has standards.... many who 'slut it up' and have a lot of sex will often lower their standards just to get more action.... some may even engage in sex acts they're not comfortable with in order to have more sex.... and then there are those who see sex as part of a relationship, and won't just have casual sex partners or FWBs.... there's the fear factor when it comes to things like STDs and getting someone pregnant, and some people are just plain celibate/abstinent.....

if you want to have more sex, you simply have to put yourself out there and actively look for it.... it's not just going to fall in your lap (or maybe it will if alcohol is involved.... hehehe.....).... but i digress.... unless not having sex is something you have chosen for yourself, then all isn't lost.... you just simply have to have faith that time and circumstance will bring you a person you want to have sex with and who wants to have sex with you, and be in the right place to engage.... but whatever you do: make sure that you don't do something stupid or dangerous/risky just for the sake of getting in to someone;s pants.... i know too many people who have done that, and are literally living with the consequences for the rest of their lives....

 

[wallyj84]

Not exactly, but it's my new goal to see how long I can go without sex. I'm guessing / planning it's going to be awhile.

Why do you think it's going to be a while?

 

[henry777]

I like to have sex very often so if I'm in a relationship and the sex starts to dwindle, for me it's time to get out of that relationship. I don't know if it's shallow of me but sex to me is an important aspect of my relationship. So no matter how much I love the guy, if the sex isn't there, I equate that to a lack of love from the partner.

 

[little10ca]

That sounds horrible... I can't even imagine what life would be like in that kind of mental state.

 

[Greysun]

I have a friend who gave up on sex a long time ago. Nothing bad ever happened to him. He's not an unattractive person. I believe he could get laid if he wanted to. He's just never found the trouble of the chase to be worth the reward. It's hard to understand, even for me, but for some people that's just the way it is.

 

[visorkols]

I think id be content with just jerking off if I wasnt able to get laid from now until I die. Sex itself feels nice but it isnt that important to me im more about having that orgasm.

 

[Exbiker]

I am worried that I have too much sex.

My "stable" of guys I have sex with is only a handful of men. I've cut it down. But still, it's too influential on my life at my age (50).

Will this torment never cease?

 

[deleted15807]

Meh sex is a bit overrated.

 

[rtg]

Why do you think it's going to be a while?

I've just got out of a 2.5yr relationship and unfortunately I have next to no libido these days. Well, that probably is fortunate though... I don't want to go back to my old single ways and sleep with douche bags.

 

[wallyj84]

I've just got out of a 2.5yr relationship and unfortunately I have next to no libido these days. Well, that probably is fortunate though... I don't want to go back to my old single ways and sleep with douche bags.

Ah, I understand.

 

[lapdog2001]

I had a 7 year gap between 2 long term relationships. After the first relationship ended, I had gotten so used to sex a few times a week, that I really started craving some kind of sexual contact with another woman. The Inter-Webs was fairly new at the time, so I used it to explore what kind of casual sex options were out there. In that 7 year gap, I only had sex 2-3 times a year. Not what I wanted, but just enough to keep me from going crazy.

It was depressing to think that I may never be in another relationship, but then one happened!

 

[hvdude]

In my third year without sex. Not stressed about it at all.

I don't think I'll ever have sex or a relationship again, but that's okay. Sex isn't really thay big a deal. I miss casual physical affection like hugs and kisses more than sex, honestly.

If you really want to have sex, why not hire a prostitute?

I agree. Being with another person is more than just sex. Having someone to laugh with, fight with, share jokes with, etc. to me is more important. I've made this statement elsewhere and the pushback has been unreal. Some people define themselves by their sex lives, and that's cool for them. For me I can enjoy a hot porn clip, jerk off, and get on with my day (or go to sleep). It's been years since I've had sex with my partner, and we are both ok with it. I know he j/o's and he knows I do. But we don't miss opportunities to hug and kiss each other, which is more important to me than an orgasm.

 

[wallyj84]

I agree. Being with another person is more than just sex. Having someone to laugh with, fight with, share jokes with, etc. to me is more important. I've made this statement elsewhere and the pushback has been unreal. Some people define themselves by their sex lives, and that's cool for them. For me I can enjoy a hot porn clip, jerk off, and get on with my day (or go to sleep). It's been years since I've had sex with my partner, and we are both ok with it. I know he j/o's and he knows I do. But we don't miss opportunities to hug and kiss each other, which is more important to me than an orgasm.

I'm not going to lie, sex is important to me in a relationship. In fact, if I wasn't getting sex, I would probably end it. I don't know what that makes me a hypocrite or whatnot, but it's how I feel.

 

[185248]

I went 2years without sex after my 2nd separation (divorce). Missed it, yes. But did not dwell on it, I wanted to work out what I wanted in life. Monty Python, the meaning of it. Concentrated on the stuff that was important.

If you have an imagination, you can have sex with Elle McPherson or Nicole Kidman if you want

In order to move 10 steps forward, sometimes you need to take a few back.

 

[ignatius4446z]

I think the longest I've ever been without sex in the last 20 years is about 2 weeks. I also had a mental period between 2012 and 2014 where I gorged myself on casual sex. I had an ever-changing harem of beautiful women and for a while I had a polyamorous thing going on with two bisexual girls. So far, so Hugh Hefner......

But then it all started to get a little routine and a bit "meh" and my libido took a dive, even to the extent of having ED. It got to the point where I would rather masturbate than have sex because I could just concentrate on myself and unlike a human being, you can just switch a laptop off and put it away when you're finished. I really missed intimacy and companionship yet couldn't find that from any of these women because they didn't get into my head or my heart in the same way as the two women I had been in love with and probably wasn't really over.

Even though I'm now with a woman who I am in love with, and who is stunningly beautiful and sexually alluring (pic in profile if you don't believe me), my libido isn't what it was a few years ago and I'm wondering if I've damaged some part of my psyche with my carryings on. We have amazing, wild passionate sex about once a week, which leaves her twitching and us both shocked and awed, but I could honestly do without it for longer periods of time. It's not lack of sexual desire as such, more a feeling sex is a balancing act and this time I might not make it across the tightrope (even though I always do with her.)

Not sure if that makes any sense to anyone but me!

 

[Nosuportneeded]

I like to have sex very often so if I'm in a relationship and the sex starts to dwindle, for me it's time to get out of that relationship. I don't know if it's shallow of me but sex to me is an important aspect of my relationship. So no matter how much I love the guy, if the sex isn't there, I equate that to a lack of love from the partner.

I feel the same way. Lack of sex in an otherwise good relationship strains things for me. Of course we all go through rough patches, but I have to be with a woman that wants to have sex a lot. Shallow? I don't think so. It's just something I look for in a woman.