Long Distance Relationships

Shenlong

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Posts
48
Media
1
Likes
16
Points
43
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
Yeah I know the likely hood of them succeeding... But I like to think that sometimes, the 'one' really just living a little a ways.

So, if only the ones who were in a successful monogamous long distance relationship could answer; that would be awesome...

So, how did you make them work, how did you keep your frustrations down, the fights not as bad? How did you beat the odds and succeed?

How did the two of you manage?
 

Shenlong

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Posts
48
Media
1
Likes
16
Points
43
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
How do you make the distance make you stronger instead of frustrate you?
 

socalfreak

Superior Member
Joined
Apr 25, 2012
Posts
3,651
Media
107
Likes
6,128
Points
233
Location
Atlanta (Georgia, United States)
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
Although the odds may be against it,.... they can/ do work.
Many of you on this site know that snarkysuccubus & I are a couple. We met here, in the chat room, about a year ago.... and have been inseparable, emotionally, ever since. I love her and can't imagine being without her...
But, our relationship takes a fair amount of work on both of our parts.
LOTS of communication.... thousands of text messages, hundreds and hundreds of hours on the phone, hundreds of pictures exchanged, Skype, etc.
You're gonna have good times and some bad ones. As long as you keep communicating, things will be fine.
We have goals of being together forever and are working toward them.
She's super smart, very pretty, funny, strong, and has a freaking killer body.
I genuinely love spending time with her and hearing what she has to say.

The distance does add a bit of stress..... but, honestly, she is soooo worth it!
 

Prof_X

Sexy Member
Joined
Apr 27, 2012
Posts
27
Media
0
Likes
36
Points
98
Location
California
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
My wife and I met at University. She was an exchange student and needed to return home for 1.5 years to finish her degree.

At that time the phone was $1/min and we were poor. So we send daily e-mail messages to each other. We found that the first 6 weeks after separation were not too bad, but that over 8 weeks separation we ran out of things to write to each other and we lost emotional connection. So I think that the key is maintaining emotional connection.

We were able to visit each other 4 times in 1.5 years. Sex was desperate but not as good as when we were together longer (a sore dick is a sore dick)

Now we are married (13 years) and have 3 kids. The long distance relationship was worth it because she is worth it.

My advice - dont have a long distance relationship unless you are both 100% sure that you found your soulmate.
 

MrGoodDate

Sexy Member
Joined
Jun 27, 2007
Posts
1,238
Media
0
Likes
78
Points
193
Location
near Kansas City
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
Ain't Skype wonderful.
I have a Yahoo and Skype relationship with a special woman, who lives just 60 miles away.
We both work and are involved with other family... So webcam and cyber serve, and they serve us well.
 

paigexox

Sexy Member
Joined
Oct 12, 2010
Posts
1,048
Media
37
Likes
56
Points
83
Age
38
The really weird thing to wrap your head around is that many successful LDRs fail when the partners start living in the same location. People tend to idealize their relationship if they see each other infrequently, which helps keep things alive, but can have negative consequences as contact increases.
 

Wrat

Expert Member
Joined
May 6, 2006
Posts
787
Media
7
Likes
136
Points
173
Location
As mentioned above, in the middle, between the eas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
My wife and I met in 2005. I went to school in a different state from 2007 to 2009. We talked on the phone every night for about 30 minutes. We got married in 2009 before I graduated and I lived away for another 6 months. When we moved in together it was like we were never apart. It's great.
 

nudeyorker

Admired Member
Joined
Nov 6, 2006
Posts
22,744
Media
0
Likes
776
Points
208
Location
NYC/Honolulu
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
They can work... I have spent most of my current relationship traveling and/or living far apart for extended periods of time. You have to make the most of the time you spend together and be open and honest about the frustrations you feel in the time spent apart. I wish Skype had been invented sooner. A mature attitude and a great sense of humor come in very handy too. At the end of the day we both know it's not a permanent situation and deal with it the best way we know how... by loving each other and trying never letting each other down.
 

Shenlong

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Posts
48
Media
1
Likes
16
Points
43
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
A lot of this has been inspiring, especially the successful stories, keep going, more details the better!
 

belowaverage1

Sexy Member
Joined
Apr 19, 2011
Posts
266
Media
0
Likes
35
Points
53
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
If the person is worth it then you should try. I don't so much suggest doing it with someone who you don't feel is "the one" but I mean you have to spend time with them to get to that point and figure it out anyways.

Find a person that's open and willing. Communicative.
Stay positive.
Be there for them in the ways that you can.
Send real mail to each other.
Just try not to argue for any reason.

I'm in Houston and the guys here have ludicrous standards as to what constitutes long distance. (Texas is a HUGE state. You can drive for hours and still be in it.)

A large majority of them have a negative view of long distance and won't do anything that's more than an hour away. Even 30 minutes is pushing it for most of them.

Make sure to find a person whose okay with the time/mile/commitment.

Love them if they are to be loved.