Looking at porn?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by IntoxicatingToxin, Mar 18, 2007.

  1. IntoxicatingToxin

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    Hey! Got a question for all you people out there... I've had discussions with a couple of my female friends lately who have all stated that their husbands/boyfriends look at porn. This bothers them. I admit, it bothers me to an extent, but I think I'm getting over it. Does it mean anything to a guy when he looks at porn? Why would he look at porn if he has a girlfriend? Is this something they should be jealous of if their relationships and sex lives are healthy? And what if their relationships and sex lives are NOT healthy? Do guys WANT what they're fantasizing about in their real life relationships, or is this just a means for them to express occasional sexual fantasies? Any insight would be greatly appreciated. :smile: Thanks!
     
  2. lizardessqueen

    lizardessqueen New Member

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    haha... wow, I'd kind of been wondering the same thing, but never asked. I'd love to know what all of you out there think on this as well.
     
  3. markw

    markw New Member

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    Nowt wrong with looking at porn... would teh gf ban the fella from having fantasies next?
     
  4. dongalong

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    Guys don't prefer porn to their girlfriends/wives!!!!!

    Guys like porn because we get visually turned on by sexual things. (a blowjob with the light on is so much better than in the dark!)
    The images in porn are usually unlike those we see in real life and some of the things shown are remembered by guys and sometimes tried or used in their minds to help orgasm when it is difficult to come.

    Women should be happy to let their man look at porn since it has the potential to make teir sex life much more varied. The women in porn are no threat because they always disappear when the webpage is closed it is the sexual action a guy wants to see and not just the hot pornstars. Sometimes if a woman has too many sexual limits, a guy can find release with porn.

    Only if your man is looking at perverted stuff should you start to become concerned.
     
  5. Big Dreamer

    Big Dreamer New Member

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    Good question Meg. With my wife and I, we most often enjoy the porn together, so there's no feeling of being unwanted or left out on either side. It IS difficult however to find movies that have the following criteria met:

    1) BOTH of the participants are attractive and fit, as opposed to a gorgeous girl and a hideous man with 10 inches hanging off of him.

    2) The girl is treated with respect, and as an equal in the scene, not as some cum-guzzling slut that was put on earth to please egocentric men.

    3) It isn't all flowery, with a ridiculous violin heavy soundtrack, shitty acting, and a dubious stortyline. For some reason, so called "couples porn" usually has the above stated pitfalls.

    Once I weed through the garbage and find something suitable, we have a blast with it. Once we got comfortable watching it, we were able to interject the occasional "That would be fun, huh?" type of conversation without the risk of offending anyone.

    It IS easy to see why a lot of girls find porn objectionable, as 90% of it is 'written' for fuckwads that think degrading women is a normal part of sex. I hope this helps you, Meg. :)
     
  6. PussyWellington

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    I think I have outgrown commercial video-porn, it's too manufactured these days but I can enjoy a good amateur/home video.

    I still love a hot and intense erotic story.

    I will always be aroused by black and white nude photography.

    Porn: thumbs down. Mirrors are much more fun.
     
  7. mrpond

    mrpond New Member

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    looking at porn for a man is like woman who likes chick flicks. different reasons. for a guy porn is purely tits and arse no emotional attachment/ for a woman a chick flick is all about emotions of being in love or finding love etc.
    now if its gay porn he's looking at then thats different ball game
     
  8. Pirate Wench

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    Even though 75% of them have no images......hubby claims the x-rated erotica and sex blogs I read online are just as pornographic as what he looks at.

    I disagree.
    It's not as easy to write it as it is to snap a picture or press a "record" button.

    You can write about sex mechanically......no emotional/psychological content tends to read like a lab report......doesn't turn Me on.....

    But include enough to make the people real... excitement, heated lust, a little fear, exquisite pain, a screaming/gasping/panting good time for all........:wink: ..much better.

    For me - erotica and pornography are Not the same.
     
  9. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    I only watch good porn. Not story wise but angle-wise and girl being well into it.

    Therefore my current favourite series (best ever) is STREET RANGER.
    POV, hot girls, although not that big tits but its okay. The guys have big dicks too and what's good is they always put a condom on and in some episodes you even see the box of Magnum XL's/the condom packet. They blur it out though.

    When I watch it its just for a quick release. I cum in a few mins watching porn. I watch porn maybe once every couple days/5 or so days a week. I have quite a few episodes of Street Ranger that I share with my mate. Its good shit.

    For me, its like a girl having a rabbit. It gets me off quicker, just like a toy does for a woman. I don't think wow I wish my gf was like her or anything. I think, yeah take it :tongue:

    Its a common problem/insecurity with women. If you have a vibrator or other toy though you have no room to talk!:cool:
     
  10. Pirate Wench

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  11. lilpeewee

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    OK here it is straight guys (I can only speak for us) get turned on by the sight of tits, pussy and ass. Porn is the only way unless we are really lucky to see a woman who wants cock and a good hard fucking and all without giving the snuggles afterwards.

    Basiclly fantasy
     
  12. tripod

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    Meg... here's the deal...

    Men are hunters by nature... predators if you will...

    They are used to scanning the environment for prey or focusing their attention on the prey through a hunt. This has given men a VERY active visual recognition system...

    Men have been hunting and setting traps for women ever since the beginning... it has made men obsessed with the physical appearance of women. Men are also very physical creatures by nature and are equally obsessed with a woman's genetic physical traits on a subconscious level... in fact all of what I am reffering to is contained in the subconscious. The physical traits are fixated on because they will be passed on in subsequent generations.

    Men are interested in what women ARE, and women are interested in what a man can DO... that's why women are more focused on the way a man treats her, how good of a provider he is, how good he is with the children, etc. and men are more concerned with how good looking their girl is... I am being general here and understand there are plenty of exceptions on either side.

    So, men are obsessed with woman's physical beauty and have brains that highly respond to visual stimuli.

    Hmmmm... makes pornography a no-brainer now doesn't it?

    Coupled with the fact that a woman produces her sex cells once a month and the man produces them on a regular, daily basis... the instances of men on the lookout for still more females to impregnate (because they CAN!) is as old as dirt.

    In short... men are animals! lol!!!!!!!
     
  13. Knockernail

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    At the principle of a relationship i do not use to watch porno. I am too much aroused knowing my partner. Sex and passion are totally up. But when the relationship goes forwards, the sexual encounters become less frequent. This does not mean that i loose interest on her. I think my sexuality turns into a "woman type". Sex has an important piece of love, sharing and care. I want to fuck her because i love her and i want to feel her and touch her. But in my mind i keep on saving a flame of the "male type". I want to watch other girls, other bodies, and fantasize that i am going to be with them all.

    I am not sure. This could be a reason for me to watching porno being with a partner.
     
  14. lizardessqueen

    lizardessqueen New Member

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    I've always been a bit intimidated by the beauty of some of these girls... I mean, I know they're fantasy in the guys minds, but they're still real women, showing their real bodies to my real boyfriend. haha... I try to loosen up about it, but it makes ME feel inadequate. Would it help if I started watching WITH him or do you think this would infringe upon his fantasy time? I think women are attractive as well and it turns me on to see him turned on. So? thoughts?
     
  15. roger7080

    roger7080 New Member

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    My girlfriend and I enjoy porn together, Its better with her I think. She usually just pets my cock while we are watching, then we end up getting really turned on and going at each other.
     
  16. lizardessqueen

    lizardessqueen New Member

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    That's a good idea... :) I'll have to try that one this weekend. Maybe we could go pick out a vid together.
     
  17. stretcher74

    stretcher74 New Member

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    I like porn. My GF likes porn. We have different tastes sometimes. Men generally like the raunchier stuff or at least be more fetishized, but I've found my girlfriends past and present looking at some pretty naughty stuff also.

    I think the idea that you reading erotic stories is somehow less dirty or disloyal than him stroking off to a double-penetration picture in TIGHT ENDS magazine, or web site kind of silly. Both cases you're ultimately fantasizing about sex that involves other people. I don't see why my gender should be penalized for having a visual over a narrative bias.

    The real porn for women is the romance novel/romance novel and I'd argue that there's even less real variation in that kind of book than in Porn.

    Lately I've been more into stories and comics (oh shit). Some of them introduced to me by my GF. Sometimes I don't look at porn much at all, sometimes I binge.

    Men like variety and if they can't have it in real life, well it's nice to have a fantasy about it. Heck women do to, but they call it by different things like adventure/risk, interpersonal drama.

    Sometimes you can work the fantasies into your real life sex play, sometimes you cant. Either way as long as it doesn't interfere with your regular sex life, who cares ?

    He's not going to leave you with for a woman on a TV/Computer Screen and he's not comparing you to those women. In fact if he has any doubts at all or is doing any comparing it's with the what appear to be 10" penises normal to the men in the videos not you.
     
  18. lizardessqueen

    lizardessqueen New Member

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    I do agree there. I not only read, but WRITE erotica. So the sole fact that I've been having fantazies in my stories is pretty similar to the visual fantasizing men do while looking and magazines or watching videos. ok... I don't feel too bad anymore. haha
     
  19. {sharp}

    {sharp} New Member

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    whats wrong with porn.....
    i had a girlfriend who hated it, because whenever we werent sexually active the porn came out. well she assumed i was replacing her and got upset,.. how does that work, its not in front of me ready to touch, its a movie, with hott sex. cumon! porn is alright, and its natural for us to do it, so why cant we watch it aswel?
     
  20. Ethyl

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    Ditto. I prefer to make my own porn and the mirrors in my hallway have proven useful time and again.
     
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