Losing your virginity.

D_Anne_T_Freeze

Account Disabled
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Posts
1,280
Media
0
Likes
25
Points
183
Sexuality
No Response
Ladies, did you tell the guy you were a virgin? I didn't. Although i'm fairly sure he knew after the fact and just didn't give a shit. I didn't tell him because i was embaressed to admit it. Looking back now i know that's stupid. the next guy i slept with it took him ages to get me into bed and i'd told him upfront that i'd only had sex once and hated every minute of it (thankfully there were only 2 of them so it wasn't too traumatic.) So if you did or didn't tell him, would you change that decision now if you could? Do you think it would have made any difference?
 

Twistbarbie

Sexy Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Posts
583
Media
8
Likes
36
Points
263
Location
UK
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
well, I'd sort of selected him to do the deed, I didn't say anything before partly because I was a little embarassed, I'd heard some guys have issues about 'taking' a girls V card, so didn't give him that option and I wanted it to be as natural as possible without any extra pressure on things. I told him a few weeks later. He had no idea and to say surprised is in understatement.

I've heard some horror stories of people's first times and mine wasn't like that at all, so I wouldn't change too much on a technical level. I honestly don't know whether I would change things by telling him prior because I don't know how he would have reacted.
 

Gisella

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Posts
4,822
Media
0
Likes
114
Points
193
Location
USA
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
Ladies, 1) did you tell the guy you were a virgin?..2) So if you did or didn't tell him, would you change that decision now if you could? 3) Do you think it would have made any difference?

1) Nope..I thought he knew it for sure, without a doubt.

2) Yes

3) Yes
 

EllieP

Worshipped Member
Gold
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Posts
9,923
Media
4
Likes
22,052
Points
318
Location
USA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I didn't expressly say anything, but I knew we both were virgins. I would change nothing.
 

Jillang

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 6, 2010
Posts
584
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
53
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
He knew, I think I kind of used it as a defense so I wouldn't be pressured as much or something. I think by the time we did it I was prepared enough emotionally so I don't regret how we handled it too much. For the first time I really don't have many regrets, he was a nice enough boy, it was my decision, it was at least in a bed and not necessarily romantic but close enough, maybe I would have waited longer but out of all my friends I was definitely one of the last so I'm not sure waiting would have made a big difference either.
 

D_Anne_T_Freeze

Account Disabled
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Posts
1,280
Media
0
Likes
25
Points
183
Sexuality
No Response
I'm surprised by the amount of women who told the guy beforehand. My female friends were all the same as myself in that we were too nervous to say anything beforehand. In my case i don't think telling him would have changed anything. He was clearly just out to get laid. But i'm glad that more women had a better first experience than i had! Now i have another question. I only had sex with that guy once. It was just too weird to see him again for me and it took almost a year for me to let anyone have sex with me again. Did you guys have more sex with your first and were you still nervous about your second time?
 

Jillang

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 6, 2010
Posts
584
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
53
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
I'm surprised by the amount of women who told the guy beforehand. My female friends were all the same as myself in that we were too nervous to say anything beforehand. In my case i don't think telling him would have changed anything. He was clearly just out to get laid. But i'm glad that more women had a better first experience than i had! Now i have another question. I only had sex with that guy once. It was just too weird to see him again for me and it took almost a year for me to let anyone have sex with me again. Did you guys have more sex with your first and were you still nervous about your second time?

We dated for about 4 months after our first time and that's all he wanted to do, every time we could be alone :) I was still nervous but definitely not as bad as the first time. There was definitely less stress and less guilt plus I knew what to expect a little better. If he wasn't my bf or a one time situation like you, I can't imagine I would have been able to do it again for a long time either.
 
8

846087

Guest
sure.. i don't see what's wrong with being a virgin, but he was a virgin too so yeah
it would be worse if ur like 30 and still a virgin ;o
 

Twistbarbie

Sexy Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Posts
583
Media
8
Likes
36
Points
263
Location
UK
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I'm surprised by the amount of women who told the guy beforehand. My female friends were all the same as myself in that we were too nervous to say anything beforehand. In my case i don't think telling him would have changed anything. He was clearly just out to get laid. But i'm glad that more women had a better first experience than i had! Now i have another question. I only had sex with that guy once. It was just too weird to see him again for me and it took almost a year for me to let anyone have sex with me again. Did you guys have more sex with your first and were you still nervous about your second time?

we weren't dating but awhile later we did hook up again. It was different second time round.......hard to say exactly what was different, I suppose I was more relaxed and able to be more confident.

I just figured I must have been something right for him to not have a clue first time round. He never asked about it - why I selected him :cool: reckon he didn't much care.
 

LaFemme

Mythical Member
Staff
Moderator
Verified
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Aug 16, 2010
Posts
40,749
Media
2
Likes
38,870
Points
743
Location
Canada
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
I would change everything about the way I lost my virginity. It was with the wrong guy, at the wrong time and for the wrong reasons. But unless someone has a Delorean and knows a professor who can take me back in time, my virginity is still lost in the wheatfield!

That's ok, though. There's been a man or two who make it 'feel like the first time' to quote Foreigner.
 

AlteredEgo

Mythical Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2006
Posts
19,176
Media
37
Likes
26,249
Points
368
Location
Hello (Sud-Ouest, Burkina Faso)
Sexuality
No Response
I'm surprised by the amount of women who told the guy beforehand. My female friends were all the same as myself in that we were too nervous to say anything beforehand. In my case i don't think telling him would have changed anything. He was clearly just out to get laid. But i'm glad that more women had a better first experience than i had! Now i have another question. I only had sex with that guy once. It was just too weird to see him again for me and it took almost a year for me to let anyone have sex with me again. Did you guys have more sex with your first and were you still nervous about your second time?

We had as much sexual contact as we possibly could, any time and any place we thought we could get away with it. There are places all over NYC which still make me smile when I pass through.
 

lottie

1st Like
Joined
Feb 11, 2012
Posts
114
Media
0
Likes
1
Points
53
Location
South East, UK
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
We had been going out for at least 6 months, he was older and so no pressure and just waited until I was ready. I'm not sure we discussed me being a virgin, it was just a given, but certainly nothing I felt embarrassed about. I jumped him when I was ready, I was just in the right place emotionally in the relatonship and then I could never get enough, lol. We were together another 2 years and got engaged, but I called it off when I knew I wouldn't want to be with him in 20 years time.

The experience was fine and I wouldn't have done anything different, I was drawn to an older guy because I didn't like the immature and pushy show-offs boys my own age. However as I got a older (2.5 years) I found him immature in many ways, which could be why he was with a younger girl. So I out grew him and ended up moving away for a new job, which helped me, as he'd hang around like a wounded puppy, hoping we'd get back together. He even took me to the train station to wave me off, but him being all drippy only confirmed I'd made the right decision.
 

CaliGrl

Sexy Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jan 24, 2010
Posts
10
Media
1
Likes
39
Points
248
Location
DFW
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I told mine. But the only reason I told him is because on our first date, he was trying to make something happen in the back of my car. So I told him that I was a virgin and that I was not going to be a cliche. Though losing it 3 months later in a barracks room probably isn't a whole lot better. If I could change it, I don't think I would. I was 18 and kinda just wanted to see what the big deal was. I never saw him again afterwards. He got back with his ex a week later and deployed a month after that.